How to Charm Me
Crawl all over the living room like a raccoon foraging through trash, and when the dog gets in your way just reach up, poke him in the butthole, and exclaim, "Wowee!"
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Heather talks about Valentine's Day on today's Momversation.
- MORONS!
(This outburst brought to you by Utah drivers. NOTE: I parked to bring you this message.)
- I know zero about sports, but my entire heart is screaming, "Go Saints! Go Saints!" I am a stereotypical woman. TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE, JON!
- Marlo has a tooth! So says the blood that she drew when she grabbed my hand and tried to gnaw off my thumb!
