Merry Christmas Eve... FROM MY BUTT!
Friday, December 24 2004
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Tis the season to be immature!
- Pull a chair up with the hyrup
Thursday, 14 August 2008 - Short stack
Tuesday, 12 August 2008 - Doppelgänger
Monday, 11 August 2008 - Four years
Friday, 08 August 2008 - The girl in the window
Wednesday, 06 August 2008
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1. elli said:
hooray!
2. Jess from Buffalo said:
Looks like Santa got his Christmas present early!
3. Mary said:
perhaps first :-)
cutely clenched cheeks, Heather, and Merry Christmas !
4. Zak said:
Does this qualify as naughty or nice?
5. the husband said:
Actually, I got my christmas present early. I knew the millisecond after I took this, that it would be seen by the world.
I'm gonna say it, because it's true: You have a great butt!
I love you, Heather!
6. ali said:
wow im here early.
anyway... LOL
7. Lele said:
I'm first??!!
8. Sasha said:
Ran out of pictures?
9. Girl.A said:
dooce - I like your ass!
I mean I like your miniature donkey! No, I mean I like your ass!
Danielle! Re: your comment yesterday.
Black bows come on nice packages. Err, you can find black bows tied on packages. Umm, Good things come in black bows. I can't make this sound like I am not a perv.
How bout these presents with black bows on?
*There, I did it*
http://cub.wsu.edu/beta/functions/chippendale.jpg
10. pickle said:
heh. that cracked me up.
oh wait. bad pun.
11. Alex said:
I wonder if I am 9th.... lol.... I agree husband.... nice but!!!... rrrrrrrr!
12. R said:
Merry Christmas Dooce and Family
13. kEma said:
Merry Christmas, Dooce's BUTT, Leta's scrumptious cheeks, Jon's scruptious beard, and CHUCK'S ASS!
14. Chessy said:
Ha! My husband has the same fixation, only with my ass, not yours. Half of our photos from our honeymoon are of my ass. (We each had a camera and he was most compelled by my bum.)
15. Sheryl said:
" Say it to my ass, bitch! "
Merry Christmas Dooce et al!
16. maxigumee said:
I hope your butt has a very merry Christmas, too! :)
17. leigh said:
most excellent! :o)
Merry Christmas
18. Karen Rani said:
Merry Christmas Eve to your butt too! LOL!
Okay, my hubby does the same thing. I opened up the folder to my son's 6th birthday party and there, smack dab in the middle of the innocent faces of little boys, was my ass. Nice.
19. chickenflicken said:
My god, I wish my ass looked that great doing a bendy/squatty thing in jeans.
I'm jealous.
Merry Christmas, Armstrongs!
20. Beth said:
Bad pun time, but as it's Christmas, my comment on this pic will be:
CHEEKY!
Merry Christmas, Blurbodoocery!!!
21. Sarah said:
Great laugh this morning, thank you!
You totally look like you are doing something completely perverted to Santa. And I know I'm not the only one who thinks that because this is one sick group. ;-)
Merry Christmas to the Dooce family and I hope everyone has a wonderful, relaxing, beautiful time!
22. LintHuman said:
As we say in the UK, "Christmas, my arse!"
23. closet metrosexual said:
From this side I would definitely say that Jon is a very blessed man.
Merry (or Mary, for Big Gay Sam) Christmas to all the butts in Dooceland.
24. The Mighty Jimbo said:
jon i SWEAR i'm not being creepy here, but heather, i have girlfriends who would have sold their first born to have stayed that thin after having their first born.
25. Ashik said:
It does look a bit like you're going to hop right on top of Santa and show him a grand ole time - you wild thang!
Motherhood is having an interesting effect, eh?
26. Courtney said:
Merry Christmas Heather, Jon, Leta and Chuck! I hope the next year brings you nothing but happiness and love. Your family deserves nothing but the best. You are beautiful in every way. Apparently, even your ass is!
27. sab said:
nice butt....you guys are awesome...merry christmas eve!
28. sam said:
Woo hoo! Dooce butt!
29. Girl.A said:
Metro,
" Merry Big Gay Sam " I like it!
But " Your husband is a blessed man " is a major contender.
Been looking for just the right catch phrase to use instead of the boring but classy " Merry Christmas "
30. Danielle said:
Girl.A : maybe the one on the right...
I got all excited with chippendale in the url, and thought "Oh yeah, gotta get me some of _those_ presents in black bows."
click
bummer. but funny.
;)
31. Danielle said:
oh, and when I saw the picture I thought of yesterday's discussion of the reindeer that poops jelly beans and the ass pennies...
Changing the subject:
what will tomorrow's pic be?
we still haven't seen the ceramic santas...
And then there is the desire expressed by many for a pic that has in one frame:
Leta, Chuck, _and_ George!
or will it be Leta playing with wrapping paper?
hmmmmm?
what if it were dooce, Jon, Leta, Chuck and George? with the ceramic santas around them? I think I'd pass out.
32. eddo said:
Santa Baby... Hurry down the chimney tonight...
Merry Christmas Heather, Jon, Leta, Chuck, and of course George.
33. Dr. Johnny Fever said:
That pic reminds me of my favorite Christmas song: A-holey Night.
34. Amber said:
lol
35. Julie said:
Just the best!
36. gardens grey said:
ha ha ha ha!
37. Lindsey said:
Niiiiice
38. maryse said:
my butt says merry christmas right back at you.
39. Mrs.Stray said:
The kid must be heavy if a full on sqaut is required to lift her from Santas lap.
40. me? I'm a nobody said:
whoa!
in response to Zak, comment #4: it depends which side of the Santa you're on.
41. Julia said:
Way to bend with your knees!
42. closet metrosexual said:
Dr Fever, thanks for the giggle. You never let us down. (As I was typing "let us", I fat-fingered "lust" instead. Freudian fat fingers?)
43. pretendingsanity said:
THAT is the only way to say it!!
44. Lisa said:
Wish I had a butt that looked that good in jeans...Merry Christmas Dooce and Family.....
45. Kiki in Wisco' said:
What kind of jeans are those? They look great.
46. Littlehoney said:
Moms'll do anything to make sure their kids are on the nice list - even free lapdances!
Merry Merry all.
47. Girl.A said:
Ha, me too Dr. Fevah.
Everything I came up with was way too pervy and stalkerish.
" I want to bend Mommy over Santa Claus " is the only one printable here.
48. dänika said:
That's what you had to do in order to get Leta out of the hostage situation?
That bad santa.
49. LadyBug said:
Heather, you look great. No kidding.
And that is one freakin' HUGE Santa chair.
Merry Christmas Dooce, Jon, Leta, Chuck, and all the Dooce fans.
God bless,
LadyBug
50. August95 said:
Merry Christmas Eve, Heather's Butt.
51. ginger said:
It is so hard for any girl to resist a good beard!
52. JulieT said:
Yet another one from the Santa Series.
53. sara said:
thank you! for making me laugh when I am having a major meltdown!
54. andrea said:
doocebooty! Wooo!
55. ash said:
Thank you for making my christmas eve so much better!!
56. 80 said:
Happy Schmolidays Dooce & Blurb!
57. Kristine said:
Now THAT is not your average clenched-cheek sprint to see Santa!
58. Cora's mommy said:
DOOCE! This is in reference to your fart smell. Cora is the same age as Leta...I noticed that my farts smelled like Cora's poops. Weird. Merry Christmas!
Sara
59. Fran said:
Leta: I saw mommy kissing?? Santa Claus.
60. Dazed & Confused said:
Merry (and Mary) Christmas to all you Dooce-kateers. http://home.comcast.net/~abba92/12%20Daze%20of%20Christmas.mp3
61. Amanda B. said:
Happy Christmas Eve everyone.
Wow Heather, nice ass. I'm fairly certain you could take Heidi Klum- she's all silicone and big talk.
For some reason I'm imagining Santa as the Ladies Man..."Well! Hello there Lady..."
62. RazDreams said:
(dooce, is "the husband" above really Jon, or is it someone impersonating him? methinks it's your wannabe-hubby.)
63. Chris from Ohio said:
I saw a movie like this once but the lighting was much worse...
64. Shiz said:
Heather, I've shouted both, "YOU'RE A NOSY BASTARD!" and "SHUT UP!" to my husband, RIGHT in his face while we were sleeping, "speaking" to someone in a dream each time. But it was never Heidi Klume.
65. Ali said:
BEST PICTURE EVER.
66. patricia said:
Am I the only one who only cares what brand of jeans those are?
67. Shiz said:
Also? I'm with Sarah (21): "You totally look like you are doing something completely perverted to Santa."
Am gutterhead.
68. Cammie said:
I'm excited to see Leta's Christmas morning face. Excited to see what Santa brings for her. I hope Santa brings her pink frilly dresses! *chuckles*
69. ling said:
hehehe MERRY CHRISTMAS !
70. Cammie said:
And I thought it was a lap dance picture at first then I thought... nah she's rescuing Leta.
71. TracyDee said:
Wonderful and appropriate picture :) Merry Christmas to you and yours!!!!
72. Becky said:
There you go, multitasking again. Giving us a funny Christmas greeting AND providing evidence of the mission to rescue Leta from the sca-wy Santa man.
Merry Christmas to the entire Armstrong clan!
73. wheezer345 said:
nice picture! Have a merry christmas!
74. closet metrosexual said:
Scott, come out of the woodwork. We've found the true pervos: Shiz, Sarah, Cammie, Amanda B. (Duh), Girl.A (double-duh), Dr. Fever, Danika, LittleHoney, Ashik, and Jess. (And we love them dearly for it!)
75. becca said:
Merry Christmas-- and cute jeans.
76. christy said:
Yes, but is it the butt OF FRANCE?!
Someone had to say it.
77. Shiz said:
Okay, I'm working today, and one of my co-workers just came by and wished me a very heartfelt Merry Chistmas.
During which he called me by the WRONG NAME. I feel so loved.
78. Mir said:
Well that is the nicest Christmas greeting I've ever received from a derriere. Merry Christmas to you and yours, Heather. :)
79. Stan said:
Dazed and Confuzed... that's Soooo funny. Who's singing that? Any idea?
80. Dazed & Confused said:
Stan - that was Fay McKay and it was recorded (I think) in the late 60's. I nearly peed when I heard it.
81. Danika said:
Perfect merry christmas greeting!!! Thanks ONCE AGAIN for the laugh!!!
And I just love reading all the comments.
I must admit when I saw the thumbnail I thought to myself "I hope thats a pic of her ass".
82. Bacon said:
Hate to tell you, but I think he asked for a hand, not a hand-job. Nonetheless, I'm sure he's quite happy with the result.
Kidding aside...
Get it? *Ass*ide...
Ha ha ha... eh... bah-humbug.
83. donnaly said:
I must admit when I saw the thumbnail I thought to myself “I hope thats a pic of her assâ€.
I think Danika wins the prize so far as the biggest prev...or at least the one most likey to use their 'aloud' voice.
The picture does make one think of lots of 'giving' , I must admit
Happy holidays and enjoy that first Christmas, dooce.
84. Regan said:
and what a lovely butt it is, indeed.
God bless us, everyone!!!
85. amy said:
Well you can tell what Jon considers picture worthy ;) Nice butt Dooce!
86. flovie said:
Check out this site to track Santa. It is quite clever. The kids obsessively check this all day long.
http://www.noradsanta.org/english/
87. Shiz said:
I saw mommy shtooping Santa Claus ...
Am crass.
And I'm normally such a good girl.
88. Danika said:
I'm not a perv I swear.. I uhh just can't get enough of Dooce. Um. Really was mostly meaning that I hope it was her ass in the pic because then it would be another pic of Dooce. I swear. Not because I really wanted to see her ass. (but what a nice ass it is) :)
89. Shiz said:
It's also very interesting who they consisder to be a celebrity.
Eric Estrada, the Gaither Vocal Band, ... and they have the WORST photograph ever of Paul Gross.
90. Karen said:
Merry Christmas from my butt...OF FRANCE!
91. Amanda B. said:
Awwww Metro...you bring a tear to my eye.
Shiz- you said Eric Estrada. I heart you.
92. honestyrain said:
I LIKE THE RECKLESS USE OF CAPS HERE.
it is so fucking liberating.
like the butt shot because i am in a liking the butt shot kind of mood.
happy christmas dooceland!
93. Stephanie said:
Are you trying to hump Santa?
94. Heather said:
That is one ridiculously huge chair!
95. Laurel 825 said:
Funny pic! Great jeans, though. Brand?
96. closet metrosexual said:
Amanda B. - A tear to your eye? Wow, I usually don't bring out emotion in women. I'm lucky to get a half-hearted shrug.
97. closet metrosexual said:
Shit - my x-mas present to Dooce is going to be late. Fukkin' UPS.
"Your package is in the UPS system and has a rescheduled delivery date of Dec 27, 2004."
98. Girl.A said:
Danika, don't be retracting anything on my account.
I for one wanna see all your asses.
99. Shiz said:
What's in my head? That damned Old Navy commercial where they sing, "Your son's coming home from college with his girlfriend; he'll be so embarrassed if you re-gift."
Thank YOU, Old Fucking Navy.
100. John Sloas said:
Right back at you.
101. Danika said:
Well you know I just didn't want to come across as creepy waiting for shots of her ass. Thought I'd explain a bit.
If I had a pic or as nice an ass as Dooce I'd totally send it to you.
102. AYEnDeeAreEeAyAitch said:
Gah! I'll spank dat ass!
103. The "other" Ninotchka said:
I love it. ha ha ha Thanks for the laugh. And the comment from Jon was just precious. You guys are too cute!
104. pismire said:
"I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus . . . ."
Bad Santa. Very bad Santa, taking advantage of Dooce like that. Oh wait. Bad Dooce. Very bad Dooce, taking advantage of Santa like that.
105. closet metrosexual said:
Girl.A - I'll show mine if you show yours. One, two, three...
106. Holy Schmidt said:
Cute ass Heather! Now if we can figure out a way to get you to post one of the Scrumptious Bearded One's shit mister!
Merry Christmas Eve BlurboDoocery!
Melanie S
107. Nils said:
"Lady, ain'tcha got nuttin' smaller ...?"
108. Angie M said:
Heather B. Armstrong; putting the ass into Christmas(s)!
109. Fran said:
I feel bad...I didn't even see Leta in the picture getting rescued. My mind was in the gutter. Sorry, Dooce. Or is this you PUTTING Leta on Santa's lap in the first place?
110. shauny said:
that is one foxy arse. merry xmas to you and the gang!
111. LauraD said:
HAHAHA!!
112. Big Gay Sam said:
So THAT'S what straight sex looks like. :op
113. Carly said:
Hi Heather, Jon & Leta,
I hope your family has a fabulous Christmas and a very Happy New Year, can't wait to see what you have in store for next year's blogs (already!)... Alright Dooce! So when do we get to see Leta's first reaction to Santa??!!
114. carly said:
oh wait, i just went back one! cute as all heck, of course!
115. Plish said:
Am I first?
116. Big Gay Sam said:
Plish said at 02:15PM, 12.24.2004:
Am I first?
no, and you're not original either. :op
117. NICE said:
NICE BUTTS.
118. grass said:
And a very nice butt it is.
119. Girl From Ipanema said:
MERRY CHRISTMAS DOOCE AND FAMILY! Thank you for another year of great stories!
120. coskel said:
ok, I didnt know who most of the "celebs" were on the NORAD site - and just for the record, who named that blond child after cheese? That disturbed me greatly.
Happy Holidays to everyone - kel
121. Bec said:
Merry Christmas :)
122. Zach said:
I'll agree with your husband on this one - nice butt.
123. Denise said:
You have a nice butt and all...but I still can't get over how big that chair is.
124. Trance said:
Merry Christmas Doocerbootery! Or BootyDoocery! Or BlurboDoocery. Yeah.
125. Amanda B. said:
Big Gay Sam- hetero sex ain't pretty. Lots of grunting and quite often on mismatched bedding. :)
126. Badger said:
Heather, I wish you, your ass, Jon and Leta the best Christmas ever! Christmas is so much more fun with kids, I have to say. Thanks so much for all the humor and inspiration, and I wish the Hamilton-Armstrong clan nothing but the best in the coming year!
(And the same to alla youse Dooce/Blurb reader types, too. I am all hopped up on bloody marys and feeling all generous and festive and shit.)
127. Gia said:
Merry ChristmASS to you Dooce!
;)
I hope Leta had a blast with the bows and ribbons!
128. RandyRambunctious said:
Merry Christmas Armstrongs....!
And to all the Doocers out there..
Ho Ho Ho
(Don't that sound like hooker Santa?)
129. ILoveDooce said:
I cannot believe that poop and farts come out of such a cute ass.
130. Fahrvergugen said:
Funniest Christmas picture I have seen all year!
131. juli said:
Merry Christmas from my house to yours. Thanks for sharing your life with us and inspiring some of the rest of us to share ours in return.
132. Girl.A said:
Silent night, holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round young Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace
133. Chloe (is here, goddammit! Why can't I remember?) said:
Thoughts about the picture:
I love your jeans!
Ah, so _that's_ why Santa was so happy in the previous picture!
Thoughts about the comments:
Hee! Cheeky! Crack! Potty humor never goes out of style. (Old prissy lady: "Why, I say!")
Happy Christmas, and a merry new butt to all, and to all a great ass. It is officially Christmas here. So have a merry one! (Oh, like I won't be here tomorrow).
134. Scott said:
That pictures explains why perverted old men become mall santas. I'm totally going to start growing my beard for next year right now! I'm also starting my all bacon diet to gain about 100 extra lbs.
Merry Christmas all!
135. Mariposa said:
Merry First Christmas Leta and Fam!!!!
136. Girl.A said:
Santa's been to my house already!
http://www.specialweb.com/xmas2002/toilet_santa.jpg
137. Rachel said:
Merry Christmas to you, Jon, Leta and Chuck. Hope your day is wonderful.
138. Ashe said:
Hmmm-mmm. What a yummy mummy! Pardon me Jon. I just couldn't help it. Btw..to every one in Dooceland, Merry Christmas, goodwill to all mankind, peace on earth and all that jazz...
139. lauragayle said:
Merry Christmas to the Dooces!
Although Jon probably made the naughty list just because of that pic...