Bus Shelter
Jon took this one of me on what has to be one of the best days of my life.
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Heather talks about public tantrums (from kids) on today's Momversation.
- RIP Louis Mortimer Armstrong: http://bit.ly/1R4tv6
- Hugs and kisses to you, too! RT: @Monkey_Tree: @dooce he probably committed suicide because he was tired of LISTENING TO YOU WHINE.
- Our fish just died. And I'm sitting here crying. And it wasn't even my fault!
1. Jeni said:
Okay, and you're not going to elaborate on that story?
P.S. Cute hair.
2. Lisa said:
Ah, yes, the "procedure" and the reconvening of! How well do I remember those days! Here's how the conversation went at OUR house:
D: But the doctor said six weeks! I asked him! He said you'd be back to normal in six weeks! It's six weeks TODAY!
Me: Go to hell.
3. Todd said:
you look good in stripes
4. trudie said:
yippee--i'm number one!!! for some reason, this reminds me of those super big Express or Limited ads they have in their windows at the mall. (or that they did the last time i went to the mall ages ago...) isn't it great to look back at photos from a certain day and have those feelings come back to you? oh, i just love it.
5. trudie said:
or maybe not... sorry about that! :)
6. Jimmy said:
Maybe my procedure will reconvene; I could use a good day too!!! Best wishes!
7. Lisa said:
On my son's six week birthday, my husband asked if we were going to "reconvene" later on that night. I said, "Sure, if you don't mind me screaming bloody murder during the entire 'procedure.'"
8. Emily said:
Pretty happy lady! The best kind.
9. Todd said:
Don't feel bad Trudie....I thought I was number one too. But having seen others in the past proclaim "YES! NUMBER ONE!!" And then having their post be, say, number FOUR, I decided to refrain from exuberant celebration and be humble...lo and behold, sure enough, I was number 3. Someday, Trudie, someday....:)
10. red said:
oooh pretty! love the hair...
11. beachgal said:
Nice! Are you going to explain why that was the best day? Or at least which day it was?! And if not, that's cool, we can all use our imagination! That might be a bit dangerous, though.
12. Kris said:
Maybe it was the day she came home, finally *feeling better* for the first time in many months. That's the first thing that comes to mind when I use my imagination. Having cried over dooce posts for three days, I, too, was ecstatic on the day she came home.
13. MelissaS said:
I didn't want to say anything about it but I've been patiently waiting for the story of this great day ever since the hellish story of the food poisoning on the plane.
14. Carrs said:
I am still patiently waiting for the Chuck aquisition story. So glad you are feeling better all over.
15. Gavinator said:
And they said diagonal stripes were out this season.... hogwash.
Still waiting on the rest of the story. The best days in my life rarely involve public transportation. Things must be different in Utah.
16. maxigumee said:
I thouht it was one of your taken-in-front-of-a-mirror photos, but then I saw that Jon took it. What's going on there?
17. maxigumee said:
Ah. It's a bus shelter..... as the title of the post says. [Stupid Max.]
18. Jazzy said:
I am guessing this best day of your life might have something to do with the reconvening of the procedure?
19. stinkerbell said:
proceedure reconvened (I need to find me someone to convene with ASAP) and a good hair day!! yes it looks like you are one happy chick. No one deserves it more!
20. sanelurker said:
Congrats to reconvening the procedure! I didn't know it was common to be out of order for that long - I guess I was very lucky!
P.S. Current favorite phrase of my daughters and I - "bottom system" teehee
21. Shiz said:
That photo has snazz!
Congratulations on reconvening the procedure! I try not too worry that I/we may have to endure something like that one day. Sucks. Leta, why did you have to be so big? (But we LOVE you, Leta!)
And calling it the procedure was awfully damn sharp of you. I envy your cleverness, Heather Armstong.
22. Heather said:
My neighbor reconvened the procedure a little too soon...she was pregnant again before she even went back for her six week check up!! She's 20, so her stuff must not only be able to fold sheets, but it must be on steroids too.
23. Judy said:
My friend was a single mom, so not being able to reconvene the procedure right away wasn't an issue, but the thing that helped you be ready to reconvene the procedure? That thing Jon wrote a letter about? She couldn't use that thing for *years* after her daughter was born. Her procedure didn't reconvene for about 6 years.
24. Dana said:
Wow. I had to read the post and each and every comment before I finally understood what the hell "reconvening the procedure" meant. Then, I had to go back and read the post and replace "reconvene the procedure" with the proper word in order to understand it.
I don't have children, obviously, since at first I thought you were referring to some post-delivery surgery that all women must have.
25. Lori said:
I'm only 21 weeks and the procedure is pretty much uninteresting to me now. Pass the cheese curls.
I'm starting to feel sorry for my husband. Oh no, wait... he's not going to have the PAIN, so I guess he gets the suffering...
26. nicole said:
you never did tell us about that glorious day in San Francisco . . .
27. Moxie said:
My guess coming from personal experience.....one of your best days has something to do with the words...UTI....Cipro...relief.
28. sarcastic journalist said:
umm.....I'll let you borrow my sick baby and my sick husband if you'll tell us about that happy day in SF.
29. Mir said:
Cool pic. And congrats on the reconvening. ;)
30. woman lover said:
Here is a hint. Why wait for the vagina to "reconvene"? There is a reason why God gave women an asshole and mouth. Sorry to sound crude, but since dooce likes to talk about that part of her anatomy, I thought I'd chime in.
31. WindyLou said:
I think it was the day you cut off all your hair, listened to the Bee Gee's at full blast and really enjoyed the procedure, just because you could.
32. Jen said:
God Heather, you look fantastic. I LUV your hair. No, seriously. I love it.
33. reenie said:
While I try to drag my jaw off the ground over "woman lover"'s post I'll just say that reconvening the procedure took about 8 or 9 weeks for us and hurt like labor never did. It scared me off for awhile and when we re-reconvened the procedure I was horrendously relieved to not feel a thing (until awhile later);o)
34. coolbeans said:
I agree with Todd.
Hi, Todd.
35. Nobody said:
There is a reason God gave you a brain and a delete key.
This picture was obviously taken the day Heather interviewed Blur.
36. Jaap said:
Over here the reconvening thing is called 'celebrating the re-opening'. I guess in most cases it's not much of a celebration ;)
grz Jaap
37. Regan said:
best because of the reconvening? hooray for the reconvening!
38. beachgal said:
I'm gonna go on a limb and say we were given a mouth so we could tell jerks like you off, 'womanlover'. And assholes are for poop. Exit only, thank you very much.
39. Dee said:
I see a door with hours on it ..... hmmmm, I'd say leaving the hospital not reconvening --- although could both have been the same day? No reconvening here in a long time!!!!!
40. Jujubee said:
So the part about scaring the shit out of some guy? We're not pregnant, but we're trying, and I don't think I've seen my husband look so hesitant about having a baby as when I told him about today's post.
41. woman lover said:
beachgal, you must be a member of the Mormon Church.
42. Bored at Work said:
First of all, Woman Lover, I am delighted that you called yourself WOMAN lover. Wink wink, nudge nudge. Nice bit of insurance there.
Second of all, the "sorry to be crude" part sounded much the same as "No offense, but..." followed by "...you are a fucking moron." Disclaimer + crude STILL equals crude, so why apologize? Huh, WOMAN lover?
Thirdly...Dooce, your site just makes me happy. My job pretty much sucks, but your Leta pictures and your ass stories and your fearless vulnerability, your trash talking and your wicked wicked mouth makes it all bearable. Thank you.
43. beachgal said:
Actually I've never been remotely close to the Mormon Church. Try again, better yet, don't!
44. Michael said:
Why all the hostility? We're here to celebrate that which is the happy dooce.
Dooce, getting back to business, glad you were happy.
God, that comment sucks!
45. newmomfromtucson said:
Hey Heather,
Been reading since a friend passed along your Blog site to me many months ago after having my baby (she is almost 7 months now) and haven't posted until now. I just wanted to say that last night I DREAMT that my husband alluded to happily paying for getting "the procedure" from somewhere else (3 places in fact running between $400-$700 a pop!). I was so distraught (mostly becuase he seemed so matter-of-fact about it) that upon waking I told him my dream and initiated the act. I'm telling this story because of its coincidental nature and because if this dream hadn't occured I may never have felt like reconvening...ever... and I had a c-section! For some of us it just must take a long time before our bodies are ready to even think about making another baby, Perhaps a survival mechanism is at work.
46. JuJuBee said:
I saw JuJuBee up there and thought," What the hell? I didn't comment yet!" Who are you, Other JuJuBee??? I have your same issues, Dooce with UTI's. They are so awful.
47. Jujubee said:
Hi Other JuJuBee! I'm just another huge, huge fan of dooce. I use this name on other boards so I didn't think twice about using it here. Strangely, I also am very prone to bad UTI's. I once had one so bad that it spread and caused a kidney infection. That surprised the heck out of my doctor.
They've toned down in the past year or so, but as I stated above my husband and I are trying to have a baby, so I'm a little concerned about the aftermath... well, at least I've been warned.
48. Mari said:
Nice hair, and pretty top :)
Reconvening of the procedure will not be taking place anytime soon in my household. I am 9 months pregnant with my third child, and even though I am getting my tubes tied, he made me go through this for the THIRD time and therefore, reconvening of the procedure will be held like a hostage.
49. woman lover said:
beachgal, what you need is a massive bowel movement. You sound like you haven't had one in years.
Well, as Michael said, why all the hostility. dooce, you ought to consider writing for Saturday Night Live or Jay Leno. Those shows just aren't funny any more. They haven't been in years.
50. christine said:
Was the photo taken in San Francisco?
51. robin said:
You should be a mystery writer...you totally left us hanging! :)
52. Amy said:
I was able to reconvene the procedure with no pain at two weeks. (Of course, I didn't have an epidural, just a tiny tear that only needed one stitch, so that probably helped a lot.) I am going to make my husband read all this just so he understands how totally lucky he really is. And I have got to try the sheet folding thing!
53. Natasha said:
This is one of my favorite pictures so far. You and Jon are both very talented photographers.
54. beachgal said:
Sorry, I don't suffer from constipation like our lovely dooce. You posted a, "sorry to be crude" comment, did you honestly think noone was going to dislike the comment? I just stated MY opinion. Sorry you don't like it. I didn't think I was getting hostile. Oh. well.
55. Tisiphone Erynes said:
dooce: You were able to reconvene the procedure in ONLY 7 months? Hah! You must have had an easy delivery.
I think that's about all I can say without sounding bitter.
56. aic said:
there is definitely a reason why we got clitorises and fingers - so we can ignore self-proclaimed woman lovers whose words bely their chosen titles and proceed in any fashion we wish.
57. you can put it in mine if i can put it in yours said:
beachgal, i didn't think you were hostile at all. the misogynist deserved far more negativity than he actually got, which is a testament to how sweet dooce's readership is.
great picture, btw.
58. tracy said:
Since I had a c-section, I was surprised (and dismayed) at how painful it was to finally reconvene the procedure. I thought I'd get to skip all that, since the procedural area remained unused. Who knew?
59. Liz said:
YOU GIVE ME SUCH GREAT HOPE!
The list of problems I have w/ the procedure and my vagina ALONE are endless. It is comforting to hear someone else has issues.
Kinda shitty that mine didn't need the birthing of a child to enduce them... but whatever. I feel your pain on the lack of the procedure.
60. tracy said:
Oh, and get an exersaucer. Much better than a high chair for those "I need you to stay here for a while while Mommy goes through living hell" times.
61. Nes said:
I totally agree Tisiphone Erynes it's been more than 16 months since the birth of my child and only tried "the procedure" three times and have completely stopped trying since last summer (wow that makes it a year of nothing) I feel it for my husband.
62. kim said:
okay- i have to tell the other side. i'm sorry but i had one hell of an episiotomy but had a BM the day after my son was born- no prob-and reconvened after about 7 weeks. the scar itched for quite a while but i didn't have any pain. i'm sure with my next one, i'll have no reconvening for months and probably will use my other orifices like that asshole womanlover said.
63. tank said:
Dooce. You make me smile more than anyone I know! I sit at my computer with this big, stupid grin on my face. And my teenagers ask me what in the world I'm reading. I just say Dooce. And they roll their eyes. ;) Congrats on your reconvenication.
And to womanlover -- gee dude. It's not like we were born to service you. If we can't reconvene, why do you think you were born with hands? Have at it. ;)
64. ella's ma said:
I had my daughter by C-section 15 months ago, and I can count on one hand the number of times my husband & I have reconvened. Those people who start back up after 6 weeks, I applaud your vaginas!!!
65. the husband said:
Heather, you are HOTTTT.
I love you.
66. again said:
when i was 20wks pregnant my doctor said we could no longer have the procedure because of a placenta previa. after the bebe was born we waited the 6wks and tried very unsucessfully. my baby is now almost 8 months old and we have tried only 3 times - all with horrible outcomes. i feel bad for my husband.... on the flip side I know a woman who showed up at her 6 week appointment already pregnant again...
67. KellyH said:
I cringed at my 6 week postpartum checkup when the doc said I was cleared to do regular activities, including reconvening. That nice man said, "If you want to tell your husband I said to wait longer, I'll back you up." Such a nice man. We didn't even attempt it until 12 weeks and I had to ask hubby to stop because it hurt too badly. Finally at 14 weeks we tried again, with lots of lube, and got all the way through it. My epis. scar still twinges every so often during the reconvening, and my daughter's 22 months old.
68. Sara said:
Phew. And I thought I was the only one having trouble reconvening. I did have a substantial tear and an 'easy' labor and delivery, but I guess I thought since it didn't hurt anymore, I'd be good to go. 4 months and I'm still not quite there. Kind of worried about getting pregnant again and the baby is still sleeping in our room. Condoms are so not helpful with the procedure, either. Love the site, keep it up.
69. Sara said:
Still curious about what was so great about the day the photo was taken, as mentioned earlier..
70. Amy said:
Wait, I DID have an epidural. What I didn't have is an EPISIOTOMY. If you need any further proof that I'm a dumbass, I *also* let my baby chew paper towels.
71. Shiz said:
By the way, Heather, thank you SO MUCH for preparing my husband for pregnancy, fatherhood, birth, and the aftermath. He learned about labour poo from dooce.com, and now he'll learn about reconvening, too.
YOU ARE A GODSEND!
72. stella said:
I have so much to learn. I'm not even dating, let alone married or pregnant (or having regular intercourse) and now I rethinking it all.
73. eco2geek said:
Sometimes, when I read Dooce, and the comments section, I think I'm attending a course in the Secret Lives of Exremely Intelligent, Funny Women With Babies (or "SLEIFWWB," for short).
As a guy who's chosen not to have kids, I had no idea how long, or why it took so long, to "reconvene the procedure" after having a baby. Or what you could do with certain feminine products in order to aid in "reconvening the procedure."
In today's "SLEIFWWB" lesson, I also learned that your husband is not only very, very patient, he's also completely unselfish. Even given that one must be completely uninterested in the "procedure" after staying up for many nights dealing with a baby, that's a long time to wait! Wow.
Looking forward to the next "SLEIFWWB" lesson. :-)
74. Carrie said:
What a pretty picture of you! And, your hair is fabulous. Work it, Heather....
75. Shmee said:
Ya, what is with the painful reconvening of the procedure after a c-section? I had one four months ago and ouch, I won't be doing any recon again anytime soon. Thanks for bringing this painful topic out into the open Dooce :)
76. Stacey said:
I will not allow myself to reconvene with anyone else for a long long time.(Not after seeing that baby come out of me that's for sure)
Worse comes to worse, I'll test the waters and uhh, "reconvene" with myself first. ha!
77. djmofo said:
what procedure????!!!
78. Miel said:
This is going to sound stupid but it doesn't look like you. Even as you would look with stripes on your face. It's a very cool photo.
79. Bibbly-Bobbly said:
Bjmofo. I think you're refering to the 'procedure' performed in order to reproduce.
80. Bibbly-Bobbly said:
Oh, dear. Do I look silly? I mean Djmofo.
81. aleta said:
my baby is over 9 months and i can count on one hand the number of times i have undergone the procedure. it's kind of okay now, but it used to bring on tremendous labour flashbacks. i had an unmedicated birth and it was not one of those fabulous orgasmic natural births you hear about (ahem. on the internet).
and you know what? BIG DEAL! i'd rather have sex that i enjoyed (oops - i mean, i'd rather enjoy the procedure) than do it because it's my wifely duty. fuck that shit. and fuck that 'mouth & asshole' comment. if we're not going there at the begining of the relationship, at the height of infatuation, i am certainly not offering my tender ass as a consolation prize.
82. bunny said:
The stupidist moment was using a mirror to look at the aftermath of my third degree tear. "Honey", I wept, "I think they sewed me up crooked". To which my DH replied "Don't worry, bun, we'll get it fixed." Could well be one of the sweetest things he has ever said, but still didn't buy him a reconvening ticket.
83. RandyRambunctious said:
Hey Dooce.....great pic...lookin awesome there. Must be the post-recomvention-of-the-procedure glow! :)
84. Mark said:
You look amazingly like the lead singer of Bettie Serveert, here.
85. RandyRambunctious said:
Ok that was enough of a mouthful without me going and making silly spelling mistakes. Thats of course a post-recoNvention-of-procedure-glow that i was talking about. Ruined that moment now haven't I?
Yay! I'm 83rd and 84th....!
86. RandyRambunctious said:
Doh!
Damn you Mark.....!
:)
87. jen said:
geez. I feel even worse now.
I've only been married for four months and we can't get our procedural timings to coincide correctly. wait until we have kids.
or wait, maybe we won't.
I miss the procedure.
88. avey said:
Wow...
I have been coming here now and again the lst fews months and after this latest post I find myself a little scared. I am 3 weeks away from baby 1.
I have little interest in the procedure right now and was looking forward to finding that lost interest again. I do miss the days... *sigh*
Soo... how do you know when you are ready to start again?
89. amy said:
The joy of twins... the beauty of that situation is that you are BOTH too exhausted to even contemplate the act :)
90. Amanda B. said:
Assholes?? I thought those were fer poopin??!! (or not poopin' as the case may be) Kids these days...sigh...
Awesome pic!
91. Amanda B. said:
and yes, that was sarcasm. It's just not a giant feat of genius to figure out that if a woman is in too much pain to engage in vaginal intercourse, she PROBABLY doesn't feel like being pounded in the ass either.
I'm just sayin...
92. woman lover said:
I was only trying to be helpful. Sigh... all I can say is, I feel bad for your husbands.
93. DeAnn said:
Is it a good day because of reconvening the procedure?
Or because you are behind bars?
94. aleta said:
sorry for my husband? uh, aren't we all grown-ups here, in charge of our own sexuality? just because vaginal/anal/oral sex isn't on the agenda doesn't mean that my husband is walking around with a hangdog expression & a huge case of blueballs. couple life is a varied, complex thing and it does not guarantee hot v/a/o sex all the time. i refuse to roll over & take it, labour flashbacks and all, just because some bullshit sex-obsessed culture says i should.
95. Michele R said:
Love the stripes in the picture!
Reading all your stories about Leta had started to make me think that having a kid someday might not be so bad . . . you have changed my mind back! SEVEN MONTHS AND TWELVE DAYS?? Congrats on reconvening though.
96. Tracy said:
I think it's interesting that "woman lover" feels bad NOT for the women who are unable to enjoy something that used to bring great pleasure but is now too physically painful to endure, but for their husbands. I suppose if you were unable to dance with your husband because you had a painfully shattered ankle, he would deserve the sympathy as well. Or if you couldn't hug him because both of your arms were broken - poor guy!
97. Brooke said:
I have an answer to womanlover's question. God gave women mouths and assholes to spit and.. do other icky things to people like him.