Family portrait
Thank you, Emily, for putting down the puppies long enough to take this photo.
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Heather talks about public tantrums (from kids) on today's Momversation.
- Bedtime, Leta lingering defiantly in the hallway. Jon: "If you want fart stories, you better get in bed RIGHT NOW."
- RIP Louis Mortimer Armstrong: http://bit.ly/1R4tv6
- Hugs and kisses to you, too! RT: @Monkey_Tree: @dooce he probably committed suicide because he was tired of LISTENING TO YOU WHINE.
1. Jason said:
First
2. Shlee said:
Lovely!
3. H in Chicago said:
So cute! I love your highlights! :)
4. Jonna said:
That is a sweet, sweet photo. Love Leta's hair!
5. Dee said:
Third! See Emily is good for something!
6. Jason said:
huh, first to post for the day with my first comment on dooce.com.
It is a very cute picture.
7. minxlj said:
Aw bless. Mischief in the making.
8. Badger said:
Aw. AAWWW! Just aw.
9. gwen said:
Cute photo. Where's all the snow?
10. Marcia said:
what a great photo
11. Cheryl said:
I love this picture... Your mommie-ness is showing and it's awesome! Thanks Emily!
12. Scott said:
I like Chuck standing stoically in the background. He looks like he is on guard duty.
13. Bucky Four-Eyes said:
Leta's tiny fist in the thumbnail says only one thing to me:
"Mama said knock you OUT!"
14. Em said:
Oh, cuteness! You all look great. And you look happy!
15. maura said:
great picture! Her hair is really getting long!
16. Honey Bunny said:
OH!
17. Chloe said:
Ugh! So *not* cute.
Yeah, totally obvious that was a lie, huh?
Is that Chuck in the background or some other dog? Does his tail do that?
18. Circus Kelli said:
Oh! That is the bestest family portrait evah! Lovely! Sweet! Just plain wonderful and heart-warming!
Happy Monday, Armstrongs!
19. Mojo said:
Nuzzle!
20. Jennifer said:
What a cute picture! You look truly happy!
21. Tiger said:
Hmmm... was browsing backward to the "Help Me Name this Photo" and... had to smirk at the
"Burning Bush" and then "The Burning OF Bush."
...I kind of liked *those*...
(& this photo is very sweet)
22. red said:
awe, i love this!! you guys are so precious.
23. Wicked H said:
Great pic but where is Chuck?
He is part of the family too?
Thanks for sharing!
24. Visvoice said:
Oh, the power of an image to bring a smile to the face!
25. becca said:
I love the maternal aspect of this photo, too... We almost never see you and Leta together (usually because you're the photographer). Totally adorable.
26. Danielle said:
um... scott, I don't think that is chuck. too yellow and too big.
When I saw this photo I said "Awww, that's nice."
Then I looked lower and about bust a gut at the ads for
"Louis Armstrong doll" and
"Armstrong books"
HA!
Louis Armstrong doll, indeed.
27. shaunacat said:
I am so glad I am pregnant already, because if I weren't my ovaries would be screaming for mercy right now.
I love the pictures of the three of you together. :)
28. Tabbie said:
I'm kind of mad right now that when its cold men can grow beards to keep themselves warm. Where was I when they were handing out beards!?!?!
29. MyChelle said:
Almost all smiles on the Armstrong family...how luurrrrvvvleeee!
30. Smark! said:
Love it when we get a pic of *almost* everyone together.
31. SaraJane said:
Great pic!!! Makes me smile!
32. Mir said:
Wow, you have such a beautiful smile, Heather. Love the photo!
33. e said:
happy happy joy joy!
34. mouse said:
Thess peeshir iss 1 gud metiforr 4 Shuck's shrenkeeng rul en yor 1 famlee. Thatt bebe iss tikin up 1-therd ef thi furgrand. Por Shuck iss berly vissibil. Andd luk haw yew R miking hem 2 walkk outsad en thatt skirry beeg yardd wit nu lish!! I wul haf 1 hart attick iff thatt happin 2 mi. My hart briks 4 hem.
35. Geremy F said:
Where's Chuck??
Oh... there he is.
36. Taya said:
Dooce, she has your eyebrows.
37. gordon said:
Leta: "Ok mom, I did my part...I acted cute for the picture...now wheres my bottle...per contract."
38. Sarah said:
You are SMILING!! What a beautiful picture of your family (helps that you are all so beautiful, too).
39. andrea said:
Yeah, what kind of dog is Chuck anyway? Just curious.
40. Laura C. said:
Dooce, I love your chin. It looks...elegant.
41. maxigumee said:
OH MY GOSH. This is like the cutest picture EVER!
42. kari g said:
great - very cute. Chuck watching over his happy, healthy, beautiful family!!
43. Moxie said:
Leta: " Mother, could stand back a bit...you are blocking my light."
44. BerryGirl said:
Sooo cute!! News Flash:
Boobah's are on sale at Target for $6!! Collect them all.
45. closet metro said:
Perfect Picture. Or you could call it "Fred II"
46. Colleen from NJ said:
Does anyone remember "Where's Waldo?" books?
Where's Chuck?
You should definitely frame this one. Definitely.
47. Mary said:
Obviously you all look cute in this photo, but Heather, I think you take the cake for the cutest in this photo--which is hard to do, considering that your daughter is so adorable. Nice work.
48. kim said:
it makes me really happy to see you three so happy..
49. JuJuBee said:
This would look great in black and white...beautiful.
50. jules said:
"Look, we can't ALL do big arms."
51. Stephanie from Tennessee said:
Aww..Very cute!
52. Girl.A said:
It's the family unit.
53. Tori said:
What a beautious family!
54. Amber said:
Beautiful, all of you. The smile on your face is so heartwarming. :)
55. courtney said:
Is that the former Congressman in the background?
56. Mrs.Strizzay said:
Is she pushing you away or reaching for your coat?
57. Peggasus said:
Hey! George and I have the same birthday! Happy Birthday to us (yesterday)!
58. sworp said:
Gorgeous grins! Good work, Emily (way to suck-up to Chuck's mom).
59. Anonymous said:
You do realize that the photo in "On the Way to Grandma's" is going to spur hate mail about how she is not yet one year old and you have her carseat facing FORWARD! Tsk Tsk
Only kidding, of course, our little girl is one year old, but not quite the required 20lbs. We have her facing forward...sshh, don't tell anyone.
60. Amy said:
That picture needs to be in the dictionary, right beside the word "Love"!!
61. jm said:
Print it. Frame it 'cause that's a lovely shot.
(psst. Go vote for Dooce at the Bloggies when they are able to get their site back up. I think they were a bit overwhelmed today. She was nominated in 4 categories. And at least one of those prizes has to have Dooce written all over it.
http://2005.bloggies.com/)
62. kEma said:
I cant believe you are smiling. Doocalina you are so beautiful as you play with the cutest child in the Universe (and not to mention the unearth happiness your man is glowing :}) BUT WHERE'S THE DOG!?
chuckles... THEY had a pic without you << traitors!
63. Southern Fried Girl said:
Love the pics where Dooce is smiling. How cute Leta looks. Love it.
64. 01234 said:
Is that a Lunar Landing Vehicle in the background? Over on the left up the hill? Why do Heather and Leta's hair look alike? What is the dog in the background thinking? Who is Joey Spampinato?
65. jess said:
so cute! You're smiling too! But where's chuck!?
66. Lisa said:
Great photo! I just came back from a short vacation trip and had to get my Dooce fix.
In the elevator of my hotel in Las Vegas, I heard a young girl, probably about age 13, tell her father that she would never get married in Las Vegas because she had begun dreaming about her Temple wedding on the beach in Hawaii. He said he didn't think there were satellite Temples beachside in HI. She said, oh yes, she'd been doing the research.
I found this conversation almost entirely odd. But maybe I missed something as I was trying too intently to notice whether she was wearing Temple garments. Couldn't see any Temple pantylines and then I figured I shouldn't be staring at a 13 yr. old girl anyway. Manners!
67. Home Detention Lady said:
Love it. And Leta isn't screaming!
68. Ehle said:
Happiness all around.
69. Jennifer in Kansas City said:
Awwwww. Too sweet! You should get one of those snugli carry thingies for Chuck, too. I bet he'd LOVE IT.
70. LadyBug said:
Lovely, lovely family picture. You look so happy there, Dooce.
71. christilee said:
If given the chance to taste human flesh,(WTF American Idol?) I think I would pass...Tempting however it is.
72. song said:
for a second there I thought Chuck took the photo
Heather, you look absolutely stunning in this pic - definately one for the wall.
Happy Birthday George.
73. Chaos Creator said:
YEAH its a good day when we see Black Beard the Ass Pirate!
74. Kittie said:
GO George its your birthday...we are going to party like its your birthday! Who needs a birthday Hummer? GEORGE GEORGE!
75. Mary said:
Regarding the carseat comment from Anonymous: I hate it that people assume that age, not size, is what should govern when a child switches car seat positions or moves up to a booster or whatever. It is size that is the determining factor in car seat safety, not the number of months or years they've been on the planet. And besides, I'm sure Heather and Jon have done all the proper research to insure that Leta is safe in the car.
76. the niffer said:
First she stole the heart of your dog and now she's taking great photos. Look out - Emily's trying to steal your family.
77. Torrie said:
You should frame it.
78. Ariel said:
Hope that one was taken hi-res because it really deserves to be printed and framed. This is one of those shots that Leta can look at when she's 50 and have a smile over -- FANTASTIC! Bravo to Emily.
Also: Love John's hat.
79. Kimi said:
Where's Chuck?
80. Laurie said:
Very nice.
And Chuck is the one taking the photograph. :)
81. Library Girl said:
I love this photo, one of my favorites for sure! Heather and Jon look so happy and you can just tell Leta is thinking: "Mom come a little bit closer, I just want to grab that thing out of your pocket..."
82. leen said:
you look so happy.
83. Cristin said:
beautiful picture, Heather. Absolutely frameworthy.
84. Melanie S said:
Such a sweet family!
Leta is going to be so punk rock!
85. A N N A said:
sweetness :)
p.s. as eagle-eyed, fellow-typepadder Scott pointed out early on, the former congressman IS in the picture. ;)
86. karen said:
Picture perfect!!!
lovely!
87. Mrs.Strizzay said:
Yet another Blog award. Questions : What does she win? If it isn't a new Honda or a big watch does it matter? Why are there 20 different blog awards? Does anyone actually even "care" about those things? Like is it just some schmuck in his basement making up shit? How do I get nominated. Heh.
88. Elizabeth said:
What a beautiful family!
89. Jeff said:
Those cheeks! Gobble, gobble, gobble...
90. Gooooder said:
so cute!
91. Evil Stepmother said:
Aw, how pretty. Her little right hand looks so dainty and aristocratic somehow.
92. Rachel said:
Very cute picture!
Rear facing before a year or 20lbs is unsafe and against the law in most states. About the person that said shhh don't tell because her child is rear facing before 20lbs. The reason for the 20lbs is becasue a child less than that could fly out of the car seat in a crash and would be killed. Since 9 out of 10 car seats are not installed correctly, there is a good chance yours is not, I hope for your sake you do not crash, I could never live with the guilt of killing my child.
93. Jme said:
Go Emm! :)
Dooce, love your hair and the lovey look you're giving Leta, whom I see couldn't care less that a photo was being taken (AGAIN!) of her. And Jon could make quite a good jolly ol' St. Nick.. :)
94. Sarcomical said:
awww, what a pretty family. but what's with chuck's obvious snubbing of the family picture in the background? he's all "hmmpph, you just go stand over there and take your dumbass 'family' picture, you baby-lovers. i shall not grace you with my presence."
love your hair color, btw.
95. victoria said:
And no pics of Chuck's pee-pee?
96. Mrs.Strizzay said:
Some children are more than 20 lbs and less than a year old. They don't FIT in a rear facing seat. I have NEVER once heard of a 17 lb child flrying from it's carseat while strapped in. *eye roll*
97. Stacy said:
Rachel, I could totally be confused, but isn't a child supposed to be rear facing before 1 yr/ 20lbs? Thataway they don't fly out the windshield? So isn't your comment bass ackwards?
98. JP said:
I love that your hair color matches Leta's...
Someone else who dies their hair to make strangers believe that their children really do belong to them...I personally know four other people who do this. Including myself.
99. the other Paula said:
What a nice looking family. Is that Chuck in the background?
Sorry if someone already mentioned it or answered that question, I havent had time to read the comments.
100. bb said:
I love how she's looking at you like, what the hell are you giving me that expression for?
lol
SO cute
101. Super Turtle Girl said:
I can't believe people are arguing about CAR SEAT...Inward until 20 lbs...you are technically allowed to face outward after 20 lbs. but really the American Society of Pediatrics says you should face inward until 1 year.
TAKE THAT!
Car seats are IMPOSSIBLE to install. If anyone is reading this, be sure and check to see if your local police have a car seat program. Without them, we actually could not install the car seat--and this is in several cars--our parents and ours.
I have a booklet here that says what is what. And no parent will be dumb enough to go on what a comment on someone's blog said, I'm sure. So why do I even bother?
Baby Bjorns are the best thing. The only expensive baby thing that is actually worth the money.
102. Hereyago said:
http://www.utcodes.org/TrafficSafety/Safety_Restraint.htm
Beautiful, beautiful family!
103. Danielle said:
I'm going to repeat myself here.... I really do Not think that is Chuck in the background. Although it would be nice if it were.
Not only is the dog in the background too yellow and too big with a chest that is wider than Chuck's, but I looked up the pic from Jan 12, and Chuck's collar is a chain. You can also see that his collar is a chain it in the dogpark pics. (1,3 etc etc) Now, I don't have the greatest monitor on my computer, but I really don't think that the dog in the background has on a chain collar.
The dog in the background looks like a lab.
Plus, would the Armstrongs and Emily really let Chuck wander that far away while taking pics?
104. butterstar said:
Mary: actually, there is a reason it's 20 lbs and one year old for children to be rear-facing--the child's skeletal structure is not developed enough before 1 yr and can be damaged worse when facing forward during a crash.
Rachel: I doubt anyone would deliberately putting their child at risk (if they were gonna do that, why use a car seat at all?). Some kids just don't fit in the rear-facing seats anymore, no matter their weight or age. And guess what? The safety people say to put kids in seats that fit them, rather than in one they have outgrown, regardless of direction. There are differing degrees of safety, and forward facing at less than 20 lbs or less than a year is better than backward facing in a too-small seat. Of course, rear-facing would be perfect, but until they start to make custom car seats for every child, that's just not gonna happen.
And besides, Leta being a week or two shy of her birthday is probably close enough, dontcha think? It's an arbitrary number because all kids are well-enough developed by then to sit forward.
ok, of my ramblin' soapbox now. :)
105. Rachel said:
I have never seen or heard of a kid under 20 lbs that does not fit in a rear facing seat. Maybe the infant seats but not a convertable seat like Leta is in.
My comment earlier was wrong, I said rear facing instead of forward, thats what I get for typing with a 2 year old climbing on me.
106. Lori said:
Sheesh, I'm sorry I had to READ the car seat sheezat.
But I will say - police department car seat safety program ROCKS!! I did not have to read the instructions or try to figure the stupid belts and latches out. It took them less than 5 minutes, what would have taken me half an hour and had me swearing.
107. Shiz said:
Yaaaay! Happy Family!
Strangely, that's a combo at a Grandview, Missouri Chinese Restaurant.
The Armstrongs are yummier.
108. stephanie said:
Um... Is it still okay to post a comment that doesn't involve car seat safety?
Nice pic, Dooce.
109. mg2 said:
Wonderful! Happy, lovely family.
110. copy_kitty said:
Speaking of car seats. Here in Texas they want to pass a law that requires kids up to the age of eight ride in car seats. Well, my eight-year-old wears a women's size six shoe and it almost as tall as her teacher.
And I'm supposed to strap he into a car seat?!
111. Cristin said:
copy-kitty:
in NJ the law is now eight years old *or* 80 lbs, whichever comes first.
My eldest was quite ticked off about this, there was never enough room in the Brownie troop leaders van for her booster, I had to drive because she is a WAIF, and is now only eighty pounds at 10 years old.
sigh
112. Mrs.Strizzay said:
All I know is Dooce can strap her kid into a laundry basket with some speaker wire if she chooses to and not a damn thing any one of us can do about it. So there. :0P
113. Gretchen C. said:
Mmmm, wintry.
114. ella's ma said:
That photo makes my heart smile.
115. Deenzadrine said:
NUBBIN!!!!
:sigh:
116. Laura C. said:
That's right, Mrs.Strizzay! :)
117. butternut said:
Now that GEORGE! has his own blog, does this mean Dooce already has a spinoff?
118. jelene said:
i love how chuckie is posing in the background. he's like, "i'm back here peoples!"
119. H.E.R. said:
Smiling! A new Dooce photo fave.
120. Kristine said:
Hee hee, dooce spin off. THATS good.
I'm home today. Sinus headache. So I am doing some blog hopping before the medication kicks in...whoa, there it is...and I was reading about American Idol...if Dooce got on that show, she would win. She has us to vote her to the top 3 AT LEAST.
Next year, she should try out...what is the name of the song she sings?
121. Mrs.Strizzay said:
Aah push it by Salt N Peppa?
122. Cammie said:
Jelene; I don't think thats Chuck in the background. That dog is yellow.
123. Colleen from NJ said:
regarding car seats:
My husband has 8 other brothers and sisters (every sperm being sacred and all) and he sat on the floor.
I come from a family of six. I got to sit on the HUMP. Kind of explains a lot about us. Mybey too much. I'll go now.
124. LadyBug said:
Love the Valectric Avenue post.
I used to sing (with GREAT feeling) a popular song by Bonnie Tyler. Sing it with me, now...
It's a HOT EGG!
Nothin' but a HOT EGG!
Gitcha-gitcha GOOD EGG
Gitcha-gitcha doooooowwwwwn.
That's how I sang it, anyway.
But I do know most of the real words to "You Light Up My Life." So there.
125. dooce said:
alas, that is not Chuck in the background. he was most likely humping Emily's leg as she took the picture.
calm down about the car seat people. I've already got about 100 emails in my inbox telling me that by putting her in the forward-facing position that I'm going to kill her. thanks.
she's over 20lbs, extremely tall, and her 1st birthday is in less than two weeks. i distinctly remember standing up in the backseat of my father's GTO when I was three-years-old. he hasn't yet been arrested.
126. Andrea said:
My girlfriends and I always thought it was "Electric Carbonute."
127. Kristine said:
Yes, but are you going to try out for American Idol next year is the REAL question?
128. Tori said:
YEAH DOOCE! Get 'em. I used to sleep in the REAR WINDOW of my parents hooptie when I was little. And I also used to ride in the back of his pickup without, GASP, any restraining device. I clearly remember standing up and looking over the top of the cab while he rode into town too.
129. Kristine said:
Commonly fucked up lyrics by Kristine:
Hotel California:
"My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim...I had to stop for the night."
Kristine's version:
"My hydro-heady and my Cyclo Den...I had to stop for the night."
130. Circus Kelli said:
Dooce,
You tell 'em, girl! My sis and I would stand through the sunroof of my grandpa's Audi Fox WHILE IT WAS MOVING and we lived to tell about it.
Honesty, y'all... you KNOW how much Heather and Jon and Chuck love their Leta... think about it. You KNOW they wouldn't do anything to put her in any danger.
All of our kids were built bigger than the average baby, and all were "flipped forward" within weeks of their first birthday, at the blessing of the pediatrician, no less.
131. Tori said:
My GOD HEATHER, WHERE IS CHUCKS SAFETY SEAT BELTING DEVICE. YOU HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PERSON!????
Sheesh. He should clearly be wearing a helmet as should Leta, considering how much you like to go off-roading with your most precious people in tow.
132. VenusManTrap said:
What I really want to know is now that Ive LOST 20 lbs. should I be forward or rear-facing in my car??!! The boyfriend votes for for rear.
133. Mrs.Strizzay said:
I swear it is ELECTRIC BOOGALOO
134. Mrs.Strizzay said:
LMAO @ Tori and Venus. I far exceed 20 Lbs but I am only 3 foot 6. Should I be restrained?
135. Circus Kelli said:
Valectric Avenue -- HA!
My Mom heard the lyrics to the song "Fame" as "Take your pants off and make it happen". She used that as an explanation of why she really didn't want us to listen to that song.
As a young adult (I was somewhere between 12-14 years old), I felt awkward telling her the real lyrics "Take your passion and make it happen" and the "real" meaning behind the song and that is was not just a "sex thing"... I did explain the facts to her, though. After all, I was pretty into the whole "Fame" thing I couldn't just sit back and let her tell me I couldn't listen to the song/watch the show any more.
136. Melanie S said:
The law here in Texas states that the child must be 20 pounds OR 1 year of age. I'm sure if it WAS wrong, she'd get pulled over and they'd tell her.
Jesus people, Leta probably gets more love and more attention than any of your own children.
Lay off of Heather!
137. Sarah said:
You all look extremely safe in that photo.
Oh thank the lord amen.
;-)
138. Kristine said:
Yeah, what Melanie said!
My kids think that Leta is their cousin because they see her picture more often than my own relatives.
"Is there a new picture of cousin Leta on the 'puter?"
Maybe I should spend more time with my kids...and dog.
139. Anonymous said:
Settle down with the car seat business,people! I clearly stated that I was JOKING. My daughter lacks a whole 3 ounces from being 20lbs. I think we can all agree that we love our kids and do what we think is best.
Sorry, dooce, if my comment was misinterpreted.
140. Carrie Jo said:
What a cute pic! I saw you mentioned in our news paper this morning, The San Francisco Chronicle in a stroy about getting fired for your blog. I was very excited.
141. La Pixiatrix said:
My nephew used to sing that Right Said Fred song "264". He was 6 and he would go around singing "I'm 264 my car, 264 my car, 260 by far!"
Funny I was just commenting with friends about how a memory is something that may or may not be true with a capital T, but its validity comes from something real on some level.
I just googled *valetric* and even tho it came up with two lame hits the top of the page said:
" Did you mean *electric* ? "
142. BJT said:
Cutest. Picture. Ever. I hope that when my husband and I decide to have kids that we are half as happy and attractive a family as you seem to be.
143. Shelli said:
now THAT'S happiness!
144. Mark said:
Isn't it annoying getting about 50 emails a day that consist of some variation of "Am I First?!"
145. butterstar said:
Rachel: my daughter was too tall to fit into the convertible seat rear-facing, because you have to use the straps in the lowest position only when it is in that way. Don't know if they make 'em different now, but that's how it was a couple of years ago.
So now you can say you've heard of at least one kid under 20 lbs who didn't fit in a rear-facing. Cruise any of the baby boards about car seats, and you'll probably hear of more. The problem is not common, but it's not non-existent, either.
146. Shiz said:
I once saw a diaper-only clad baby sitting between the front seats on the plastic hump above the parking brake. At that I *was* upset.
Also, one of my friends was brought home from the hospital in a CARDBOARD BOX.
147. LadyBug said:
Shiz, did they at least mark the box "Fra-geee-lay"?
148. tickled said:
All this talk 'bout hearing things the way they ain't reminds me of a neighbor kid who thought
"Silent Night" had a line that went "Mind your business, Mother and Child."
And of course we all know the hymn "Sadly, the Cross-Eyed Bear."
149. Cristin said:
I remeber when Alanis Morisette's first hit was hitting the charts, and a girl called the radio while we were listening. After "You oughta know" was on for the millionth time in three days, this ditz (lol) wanted to know what the "cross-eyed bear" looked like!
150. Brian Ford said:
You... people... scare me.
151. Wendy said:
My friend thought the lyrics to "Dead Man's Party" included:
"Leave your body, asshole, at the door..."
Bwa!
152. LesleyMW said:
I remember my sister hitting the brakes really hard so my other unbelted sleeping sister would fall off the back seat and get wedged in the foot space. It worked-we laughed and laughed! (Hi Lisa!) Yeah, she was 14-not a baby!
153. Rachel said:
Actually the top slots are only for forwards so the rest are for rear facing, only a few seats can be used forward or rear using any of the slots. I do hang out on the car seat boards, I am a Tech, one of the people that works at car seat checks and teaches parents how to use their car seats.
How much a parent loves their child has nothing to do with them using the car seat correctly. People just do not know and do not research. I am not saying Heather does not love Leta, I know she loves her more than anything in the world. I am just saying that she is not as safe as she would be if she was rear facing. I think every parent needs to do the research to make their child as safe as possible but if you don't know its not safe then that does not mean you do not love your kids.
154. Tracy said:
There's actually a term for misheard song lyrics; they're called "mondegreens".
Remember the disco song "Le Freak", by Chic? We always thought that was a dirty song inciting us to do bad things, because we heard the chorus not as "Le Freak! C'est Chic!", but as "Let's freak! Say 'shit'!"
Also, the Cal Worthington Dodge commercials with the jingle chorus, "Go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal"? My 7-year-old brain heard that line as "Pussy Cow" - I thought it was Cal's affectionate term for his customers. "Buy a new car for your wife, she will love you all her life, pussy cow, pussy cow, pussy cow..."
155. Marie said:
I found my mom at the computer one day listening to all my brother's cds and writing down all the stuff she didn't think was appropriate. The problem is that she ALWAYS gets the words wrong to every song and what she thinks she hears is always something "offensive". So when she got to the song "Sixteen" on No Doubt's Tragic Kingdom she had mistaken the line "you poor little thing" for "porn queen," which she wrote down in bold with a dozen exclamation points and question marks, like she just could not believe it. I had to gently set her straight before she got to my brother.
156. Tammy said:
I love the dog way off in the distance. Is he going through that weird teenage rebellion thing where he doesn't want to be in family photos? Joke's on him, I guess ;)
157. Mrs.Strizzay said:
Rachel, I guess it falls under the category of "If I don't fucking ask your opinion then shut the hell up". :0)
158. Marti said:
ELO "Strange Magic"
I thought it was "Gotta change my chick."
OR how about this one: Toto "Hold the Line"
"Or the lies."
I love messed up songs. A very funny day!
159. Fish said:
I always make sure to strap my kid into the rear-facing position when I put him into the carseat I nailed to the top of the car.
He fucking loves it up there, and you can hardly hear him cry when its raining.
160. Cristin said:
bwah hah hah
good answer lady!
161. Cristin said:
lol fish
162. koof said:
you look *so* happy, dooce. i have envy. lots of envy. but i am so happy for you.
163. RazDreams said:
dooce, just explain to all the busybodies that leta IS facing the back of the car and that chuck's actually up there driving in the front. he's looking over his shoulder, watching you in the backseat, taking a picture of leta.
duh.
164. Heather 2 said:
For the longest time, I thought it was:
"We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue, and then we'll take your tire."
165. Tori said:
Last comment:
I used to think that Fleetwood Mac song "just like a one-winged dove", went more like this,"just like a wandering dog".
Someone finally pointed that out to me LAST YEAR, as I was singing about a wandering dog at the top of my lungs.
166. butterstar said:
Rachel, if you do all that then you should know that it does indeed happen. Not all babies fit into carseats the way you would prefer them to.
AND, if you were'n t paying attention, Dooce already mentioned that Leta is over 20 lbs and will be a year old in just another week or two. She's perfectly safe facing forward.
LadyBug, you slay me! Fra-geee-lay, indeed.
Fish, I hope you'll remember to use one of those mosquito netting things over his seat once summer rolls around. Must remember to be a responsible parent.
167. Melis said:
What no one ever tells you is that if you plan to use the Baby Bjorn in winter, buy a bigger coat. I cannot get my 4 month old to sit still in the thing if he's got his sherpa snowsuit on!
168. A N N A said:
Also, the Cal Worthington Dodge commercials with the jingle chorus, “Go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Calâ€? My 7-year-old brain heard that line as “Pussy Cow†- I thought it was Cal’s affectionate term for his customers.â€
OMG!
i can come out of the closet now-- as a little kid, i thought the SAME THING!
"pussy cow, pussy cow, pussy cow!"
my father didn't have the heart to correct me because he thought it was cute. so cute he trotted it out at family gatherings, etc. sigh. ;)
169. Danielle said:
Tori, Wait!
You mean it isn't
"just like a light-wing bird"
??
WTF?
guess no one ever pointed that out to me. hurmpf.
170. A N N A said:
fyi for probably no one, my last comment quoted Tracy, but my html didn't show. dagnabit.
171. Susie said:
Tori and Danielle (and Wandering Dog), it's "white-winged dove..."
For more misheard song lyrics, check out amiright.com
Very entertaining.
172. Fish said:
"I was on the Muppets."
for nine inch nails
"I was up above it."
173. Danielle said:
There can be kind of a bad moment in karaoke when you finally realize what the words are _after all these years_ and start laughing so hard that you can't sing for a couple lines.
Not that it has happened to me.
Nope. Never.
174. annakay said:
from comments la dooce has made in the past, and papa jon too, i get the impression that they do their research. (i'm not going to say they do-do their research, although that would be okay to say here, huh?)
175. Danielle said:
Well, I'm glad it isn't one-winged dove. That is kinda gross.
What I learned at dooce today:
mondegreens
Glad I'm gettin' me edge-geh-ma-kated here at dooce.com.
176. Shiz said:
Um, isn't *karaoke* a bad moment?
I always thought, until my mid 20's, that the lyrics to Manic Monday were, "Just another man ain't monday." I didn't know the name of the song; I was just plain confused.
177. GEORGE! said:
I fixed the bandwith issue with my photos, so you can all see me as a little boy again, enjoy.
Oh yea, I love this photo.
178. Tracy said:
A N N A - really?? That rocks. =)
Loving all the misheard lyrics comments - even though my mental jukebox is on a seriously weird loop now... I'm a wandering dog, 264 the Muppets down on Valetric Carbonute - my hydro-heady and my Cyclo Den; gotta change my chick, cuz' it's nothing but a hot egg!
179. the original kp said:
okay, so this is a bit late, but i just read the comments and i laughed out loud to #50 (jules i think?) eddie izzard! fantastic!
happy dooce! yay!
180. Meggan said:
I second #179 about the Eddie Izzard reference. Wonderful.
This is such an adorable photo!
181. Heather 2 said:
Tracy Chapman, Fast Car:
"Speed so fast 'cause that guy was drunk."
Just realized that wasn't right my sophomore year in college...
182. Danika said:
I thought it was one winged dove too!!!
Love the family pic!!!
183. Bucky Four-Eyes said:
This uber-stoner commissioned a painting from my brother: a speaker cover adorned with a dove, minus a wing. My brother thought it odd but didn't question a paying job, and painted as requested.
His curiosity got the better of him when he delivered the cover, and he asked him what the painting meant.
"You know, that Stevie Nicks song, man, just like a one-wing dove," stoner replied.
My brother said the guy's face just fell when he was informed of the correct lyrics. One tiny bubble, *burst*!
184. R said:
my roommate thinks that the lyrics to Alanis Morrisette's You Outta Know song go "the cross-eyed bear that you gave to me." oh, and she thought Elton John's Tiny Dancer went "lay me down in sheets of gladness." we do like to change it to "hold me close now Tony Danza"
185. Ashly said:
What with the carseat bickering and the hilarious mis-heard lyrics (Pussy-Cow) this is the funniest set of comments EVER!!!
186. closet metro said:
Fish, you floored me.
187. Aliesha said:
Wonderful photo!
188. Fluit said:
I absolutely HATED "You Light Up My Life" when I was a kid, but I have already told my fiancee that we're inviting you to our wedding if it means a drunken, Southern, bona-fide Boone rendition of that song sung entirely from memory. We'll ensure that plenty of bourbon is available.
189. tickled said:
Cristin--
Whaddya mean, "good answer lady!"? Fish is a BOY. I busted out laughing at that comment too, rare for me. A little giggle's usually all I can muster.
190. Nicole said:
What the fuck kind of angle is that photo taken at? Did Jon take the BOY into the bathroom to take that? Hoo boy.
191. Graygirl said:
My all time favorite pick-up story:
Was girls night out, went to a male strip show since one of the girl's sister was going out with one of the dancers. I was 8 months pregnant....yes 8 MONTHS! (And no I wasn't drinking!) This "boy" (barely 21) walks up to me, in all seriousness and says "So what's your sign?" I had my mouth hanging open in disbelief and he persisted to follow me around. I finally had to tell him my husband was outside waiting for me and I was going to have him kick his ass if he didn't leave me alone!
192. U.B. said:
I know it's not the lyrics, but every time I hear Beck's first song "Loser", it sure sounds like the chorus is:
Sores, on my genitals!!!
Cuz, I'm a loser baybeee
so why don'tcha kill meeee
193. TORI said:
JUST LIKE A WHITE-WING DOVE???!!!!!!!!! JESUS! Now I am officially the idiot of the day for stating my version of the song THEN correcting it with yet another WRONG VERSE. Holy hells bells.
I think I'll stick with wandering dog.
194. Karen Rani said:
“No one knows about your website? How come?â€
I think I just peed my pants.
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead...
195. Michelle in San Diego said:
Holy Shit
Dooce is up for a bunch of awards.
Go here and vote.
http://2005.bloggies.com/
196. JessicaRabbit said:
Well these are not quite misheard lyrics but, when my son was little he thought the local Menards hardware store jingle, instead of Save big money when you shop Menards, was Same big Mommy with the Knives. I don't know how his mind took it there but he really thought that was the song.
And once my xhusband was trying to fix our car radio that had been having some bad static problems, and I had a cd in the player, and he was really mad because no matter what he did all he got was static, so finally he tried the cd and just let it play while he was working on some wires and then he hears this guy start laughing and say " I hope you enjoyed our little joke" and he came in the house raving mad, I forgot the cd in the player was Type O Negative and the first song on the cd is a track called Bad Ground and its a joke, the whole song is just static feedback for about a minute, and all the time he was working on the radio it was playing that track because he would just go damn its still not working and turn it off. I was very amused, he was really not. heh.
197. Colleen from NJ said:
yo, what's wrong wit Hoboken?
198. 01234 said:
This sounds like Married Woman Blues, where any conversatin with unattached males generates a Pavlovian panic reaction. Poor kid. He sounded like he was worth following for a couple of minutes, if only to wind him up a bit.
Re: Bloggies:
they're even stealing Dooce lines, like *Learn About the Procedure*. Go ahead Heather, tell 'em about the procedure!
199. Cristin said:
hey tickled, I was saying that to MRS STRIZZAY, then fish's comment came up right after, so I said lol to him, really!
200. Alaska Danielle said:
01234 - wasn't it "reconvene the procedure"?
201. emdot said:
Wait. It doesn't sound like that guy was trying to pick you up. It sounds like he was just being friendly. I begin conversations all the time with married strangers and ohmigod I surely hope they do not think I was trying to pick them up.
Meanwhile, and I kid you not: I sang You Light Up My Life WITH Debbie Boone on TV with my church choir when I was 12. My one and only claim to fame. Or ... I guess fame is not the appropriate word in this instance. Supermegamonsterfame, more like it.
202. Fran said:
I thought Kenny Rogers was singing, "You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille. Four HUNDRED children and a crop in the field." But it's actually four HUNGRY children. I just found that out Tuesday last week. Who knew?
203. Amanda B. said:
That is a really sweet picture.
I was telling Mir the other day how traumatic it was for me the first time a teenage boy called me, "Mam". I went from "Hot single gal", to "That Lady" in 4.7 seconds.
I need chocolate.
204. La Pixiatrix said:
Fran, I always thought it was four hundred children too. I thought Lucille was a big cow. No, a really big BOVINE cow. And the kids had no milk for their cereal...
Hey, Manda. You're still a hot gal in my book.
205. Scott said:
Who says that kids even need to be in car seats? I strap little kids on my windsheild wipers because "onesies" and footy PJ's work better than the rubber blade at whisking away the water. Nightime visibility is very important to me.
206. acb said:
I'm sure I'm way off topic by now, but since I can't read all 205 comments before me, I will just add my two cents. You know the Mr. Mister song 'Kyrie Eleison'? Well, my boyfriend thought the words were 'Give me a laser where I'm going would you travel... give me a laser in the darkness of the night.' Apparently he doesn't know his church latin ;-)
207. Dr. Johnny Fever said:
"Hi, I'm from Simi Valley, CA -- proud home of the Rodney King trial. Where are you from?"
208. BeastlySum said:
oh...sigh. just finished laughing out-loud at your post. many thanks.
209. Emmylou said:
You car seat people are nutjobs. I really mean that.
210. christine said:
tempanyaki
no no no, bad Heather...it's Teppanyaki
211. Amanda B. said:
Thanks Pix. ;)
*throws back hair dramatically*
212. Kristine said:
See, all the more reason *I* need the Nikon D70.
Use the flash to ward off all the young guys hitting on me.
HA!
213. Gooooder said:
ahahahaa amazing.
i hope the flash blinded him for a few minutes.
214. Michelle said:
Hilarious - hilarious post. So great, so great!
215. jenn said:
Can we work it out? Can we be a family? I promise I'll be better...
216. DeAnn said:
Heather's smiling! Smiling!!
And you all are adorable.
Also, Chuck looks plastic or stuffed in the picture on the way to grandma's.
217. moose said:
...so...i'm still confused...
is it "blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche, you know the roller in the night"... or "revved up like the Dooce, another rumor in the night"...???
and yeah, my kid was too tall for the dang straps. still is. at 9, over 5 feet tall and over 90 lbs. ain't sittin in no goldang car seat now, that's for sure. scuse me...
218. minxlj said:
JessicaRabbit: (comment #196)
Good taste in music! My fiance did the EXACT same thing with that very track, and luckily discovered his own stupidity before he took the car into the garage...the daft thing was, it's HIS CD and he's had it for years. Doh.
219. tickled said:
Cristin--
Let's see if I have this straight: Your comment 169 was a response to Strizzay's comment 157, not Fish's 159, right, and since Strizzay IS a lady--. Okay, gottit. Sorry.
It behooves us to remember to address ppl by name when commenting on earlier comments, does it not? Things move, like, SWIFTLY on this site.
220. Sarah said:
Why were you so mean to that boy? I didn't think you were like that.
221. Peter Hentges said:
My friend K, who is pushing 50, I'd guess (she has a son that just turned something like 28), was recently the object of some poor soul's affection at a local pub. She was there to see some mutual friends play and sat down front with the rest of the groupies, family members and general hangers on. Right behind them sat a bachelor party. One of the fellows in said party, having had quite enough to drink (it being an Irish bar and all), tried his very best pick-up lines on my friend. These included the gems, "I just can't stop staring at your tits." and, "What's your favorite position." To these, K responded, "Yeah, I like them too." and "Standing up," respectively. On further profferings of a supposed good time, K demurred, particularly after finding out the fellow's age was exactly that of her son, making her demonstratably old enough to be his mother. She eventually had the other fellows in the bachelor party take their inebriated friend home. Once they had left, she did a little Snoopy dance.
222. Bucky Four-Eyes said:
Moose (#217) -- don't know if you were funnin' but in Manfred Mann's version, it's:
"Blinded by the light
Wrapped up like a dooce
Another runner in the night"
(I believe in the original, Springsteen said "Cut loose like a dooce, another runner in the night")
I use the preferred spelling of "deuce" of course.
223. AlbionJessica said:
I always thought the lyrics to Layla went: "Gay love... got me on my knees... gay love..."
My father just corrected me last year.
224. Circus Kelli said:
Oh man... y'all crack me up! Fish! RazDreams!
Hey, where can I find the lyrics to "Louie, Louie"?
225. :) said:
First time ever that I see you smile at Leta on a photo!
226. Tips for findin shite said:
Circus Kelli
Go to Google.com, Click on groups.
Navigate or search for one of several lyrics groups (exm alt.lyrics)
Then type: "louie louie" lyrics
In the search box and press enter.
Or search Google.com with the same terms.
I just prefer the Google groups because there are no pop-ups or spybot attacks through Google groups.
227. Circus Kelli said:
Tips for findin shite -- thanks! I diddin thin there were actually words to Louie Louie.
I heart Google muchly.