Bump watch begins
The bump at 12 weeks:
Before you get all skritchy and start yelling that this is not at a bump by any stretch of the imagination, let's compare this to the bump at 15 weeks from my pregnancy with Leta:
Could someone please tell the woman in that photo to put some sunscreen on?
Also, some of you have suggested that I might be pregnant with twins, and believe me when I tell you that I lived with the nightmare of that possibility for ten and a half weeks. And no, I'm not going to apologize for referring to it as a nightmare, I'm sure your twins are lovely people. But I am not the type of person who can handle that type of chaos and readily admit that you are a better person than I am. We had the doctor check for twins during my sonogram, and she promises me that there was only one swimming around in there. Look:
I asked her if the sneaky twin could be hiding somewhere in a corner? Maybe it had dressed itself in an invisibility cloak? And she was all YOU'RE SO SILLY! And I was all, hmm, I don't think "silly" is the clinical term for it, do yourself a favor and REFRAIN FROM GOOGLING MY NAME.
Now, on to a burning question that's sort of sitting out there making a few people uncomfortable or at least a little more curious than they are used to being: I am still taking Prozac. Last year when I found out I was pregnant (the one that ended in miscarriage) we found the phone number for the doctor who treated me for postpartum depression in the hospital in 2004 and left a desperate message. He does not treat anyone outside of the hospital but was generous enough to return our call and answer our questions about medication during pregnancy, and his advice was to remain on Prozac (although he did suggest that I stop taking Neurontin and Valium). Prozac has a half-life so long that even if I had stopped taking it when I found out I was pregnant it would have remained in my system for several weeks. He's been treating postpartum depression for over 30 years and has seen hundreds of pregnant women who have continued taking Prozac go on to have perfectly healthy babies. My OBGYN agrees with him.
I do not know about any other medications, and if you have questions or concerns about your own you should call your doctor. I do know that I feel good about this decision, and so far things are really good. Am I physically miserable? Absolutely, but I'm really hopeful and coping like I should be. And this time I know exactly what signs and symptoms to look for in my mood and what tools I can turn to. I feel so much more prepared, like I know I'm about to jump into a pond full of crocodiles, and this time instead of throwing in my naked body head first I'm climbing into an armored Humvee that will be slowly lowered into the water, machine guns first.
Will people accuse me of putting my baby in danger by continuing to take Prozac? I expect that email or comment to hit within minutes. This wouldn't be the Internet without those lovely little cutie pies. Smooches! The reason I bring this up is because someone is out there right now trying to make the decision about whether or not to stay on her medication, and even if her doctor is telling her that she needs to, that it's perfectly okay, she knows that if she does she'll have to listen to some dickwad condemn her for trying to kill her baby. I want that woman to know that I am surrounded by those dickwads, they have my email address, my mailing address, their own websites where they go on and on about how sad it's going to be for my children to grow up with such a crazy mother (Hi, guys! Thanks for the traffic!), that I shouldn't be allowed to have another baby. IT'S ALL BEEN SAID ABOUT ME. All of it, the same things over and over again. I want you to know that all of those people are dealing with their own issues, it has absolutely nothing to do with you, and that I'm willing stand up for me and for you and say, hey, thanks for your concern, but I'm perfectly capable of making decisions for me and my baby.
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Heather talks about public tantrums (from kids) on today's Momversation.
- RIP Louis Mortimer Armstrong: http://bit.ly/1R4tv6
- Hugs and kisses to you, too! RT: @Monkey_Tree: @dooce he probably committed suicide because he was tired of LISTENING TO YOU WHINE.
- Our fish just died. And I'm sitting here crying. And it wasn't even my fault!
574. julie harris said:
Heather,
I also stayed on my depression medicine while carrying both my children.
My mother was dying of cancer at the time while I was raising my then 2 1/2 year old, and I was pregnant with my second.
It was so important that I had to function.. and my boys are healthy..
Good for you for speaking your mind about everything. I love your blog, you make me laugh daily.
575. Real Julie said:
Heather, if your doctors approve, and you need "mommy's little helper," then don't feel guilty. But if you were just relying on the meds and not really needing them, then it would be time to give them up.
Happy moms make happy babies. Don't fret, enjoy your bump!
576. Meg said:
Thank you for this post. I took antidepressants all through my first pregnancy (and she came out with all 10 toes and fingers...spread out over 3 hands!....just kidding). Everything went fine. And now that I'm pregnant again, I'm opting to stay on my meds. My new doc wanted me to try weaning off of them, but I was contemplating how to kill my fetus within 3 days of a REDUCED dose, so I'm back on the meds. It's a hard decision to make, but I am applauding you for so publicly making it.
577. Sandy said:
YEY! I'm so excited for you!! CONGRATS
578. Lizzie said:
I've taken antidepressants through two pregnancies so far without any problems. I'm still on Zoloft with my fourth pregnancy and so far so good. Nothing but healthy babies here. :)
579. Lo said:
I struggled with whether or not to stay on medication this time around. PPD blindsided me after my first (meaning, having never dealt with depression before, I thought I would be "immune"...HA!) and I've been off and on Zoloft ever since. When I found out I was pregnant I made the decision to try to get off meds and so far so good (other than that I've turned into a royal bitch). But that is absolutely NOT to say that I wouldn't go right back on the medication if things started going downhill. Every single doctor I spoke to (which has been a lot because I'm *gasp* 35 so I'm considered a geriatric) told me that Zoloft was safe to be on. It's such a hard decision to make and you have to do what you think is best for you and your family. It's funny how most of those "dickwads" you mention probably have never had to deal with the madness before. Believe me, if I make it to the end unmedicated, I'm going to delivery this baby with my prescription in hand ready to be filled.
And your bump is lovely. We have the same due date and I look like I've eaten way too many tacos. Sigh.
580. Mothering Two said:
I lurv your honesty and willingness to share stuff about your life. I wish more bloggers had the same courage to be as raw and honest as you. Yes, I realize everyone has their limit to how much they are comfy with sharing with strangers, I just love when I come across a person who ain't afraid to let some of her realities hang out openly! You are just absolutely beautiful, Heather. Your kids are lucky to have you for their mama, too. :)
I'm excited to watch your bump grow! Though, after having two children and nipping my husbands nuts off (The Big V), I am happy to say there's no more bump envy here. And I loved being pregnant... just so OVER IT. ;)
581. adena said:
you sure those aren't BALLS you're carrying around? cause, man, you've sure got big ones.
all of this meant in a GOOD WAY. you're too cool for school armstrong.
582. Heather J said:
you look fantastic.. and no matter how many people tell you that, you'll never believe it, but...
and the decision to stay on prozac? ummm...YEAH!?!?! DOCTORS said it was ok. Are the crazy emailers doctors? nope. Screw 'em.. probably the same type of people that wanted to only eat organic food, do yoga all the time, hug trees and dodge soap and are perfectly back down to their original weight immediately after pregnancy... we don't believe that these are real people here in MI... (we even had an occasional glass of wine or BEER during our pregnancy.. we weren't throwing back jagerbombs and dancing on tables in all our pregnified glory). I had to continue certain migraine , depression and pain meds, and my punkin is AWESOME.
583. Domestic Goddess (in training) said:
Ok, how come my bump is way bigger than yours and I had my baby almost four months ago?!?!?!?
NOT FAIR!
Maybe my son's twin is still hiding in there!!!!
584. andrea said:
My guess is that you are showing more out front because you are having a boy? My friend who lives 500 miles away was the only one to guess correctly that I was having a boy purely based on where I was showing (way out front). How would Leta like a little brother?
585. Lyndsay said:
Take your meds, everything will be fine. Fuck the haters.
586. shannon said:
Screw the negative nellies! Do what's right for you and don't give the asshats a second thought, as they do not deserve it!
587. Andrea said:
I have to admit that when I saw Chuck with the pee stick on his nose I did think back to what a hard time you had after Leta was born. I wasn't worried for the baby as much as I was worried for you. I'm so glad you're doing what you need to do to preserve your sanity, and I'm so thrilled for you all.
And please, I beg you, if you eat placenta like one reader suggested, can you NOT tell us about it? I don't think I could handle that...
588. Anonymous said:
Screw the haters.
You look fabulous. Best wishes for an uneventful pregnancy and a happy arrival.
589. Anonymous said:
My god you are ugly.
590. aimee said:
I think it's kind of sad that you had to actually consider that whether or not you are taking prozac is weighing on the minds of those reading your blog. Perhaps people should read blogs from the context of, "I enjoy this person's writing and would like to keep reading more" and less of "OMG this person is someone I must be friends with and connect with and I wonder if they know this or this and I'm so worried about them (or judgey about them)"
People are weird.
591. anonymous said:
Thank you so much for talking about taking your meds, Heather. I've been dreading pregnancy, ONLY because I've been dreading the thought of having to go off my antidepressants. I needed to hear that other women grapple with this decision and choose good mental health over unfounded "evidence."
592. momomatic said:
Do you read all of these comments? I scrolled through 300 and feel all jello-y from the love.
Keep on keepin' on, Heather.
243655. Laura said:
...another example of why 12-year-olds shouldn't have unsupervised access to computers.
593. tb said:
i remained on prozac for both my pregnancies. as a result, i have two healthy, cute, smart, well-dressed sons. and i didn't lose my mind.
594. Allison said:
You help so many people with what you say. Thank you for that.
And I am going to being working skritchy into my conversations.
595. Tammy said:
I have been reading your blog for a couple of years now. I have never commented but when I read this I wanted to jump up and scream "hell yeah". It is your decision to stay on your meds and you have made an informed decision to do so. The dickheads can all just go jump off a bridge. Congrats and the pregnancy.
596. Dawn said:
Wow, I know the website supports your family, at least in part, but the trade off of having people make such crappy comments and judgments about your decisions must really suck. You obviously know that the decision about medication (or whatever) is something for you and your doctor to make, but I hope you know that there are loads of people who completely support that. Best wishes for a healthy pregnancy and for a better postpartum experience than you had with Leta.
597. Regina said:
I just want to thank you for your strength and honesty. I would not have the courage to do what you do and I know that this post helped many women. It also possibly helped those who are so quick to judge, to start to chip away at their certainty that the way they do things is the ONLY RIGHT WAY. People make the best choices they can and you are going to have a very happy, healthy baby. I am sure of it.
- Regina
598. Stacey said:
Dooce,
First, congratulations!
Second, wishing you all the best, and a safe and healthy pregnancy / baby # 2.
Third, kudos to you for standing up and saying, *I* will make the decisions that I feel are best for me and my baby.
No one can tell you differently. You kick ass.
LOVE reading your website.
599. Tanya said:
Even if there was any danger from the Prozac (and I've never heard that there is), I think you'd be putting the baby more at risk by getting off of it. The withdrawal is supposed to be a real, deep blue ass-kicker, and if you became a danger to yourself, how would the baby be safe?
I hope that isn't too blunt. What I'm trying to say is that I think you're doing the right thing. You're an awesome mom, and proving it again by doing the research.
Don't let the bastards get you down.
600. kmira said:
I spoke with a Pediatric Psychiatrist before conceiving and she said the most researched drug for anxiety/depression was Prozac and it was highly recommended during pregnancy over anything else. I came off of my meds when I became pregnant, and I felt fine...until I was 8 months along and was CONVINCED that the mailroom guy at our office was going to kill me. I spoke to my nurse who told me to go upstairs (psych dept) immediately. We decided on a low dose of medication. She said my stress would be more harmful to the baby than the med. It helped me so much, but I couldn't breastfeed. That stung a little, but I wanted to be a healthy, stable Mom. And that's what I am today, after 5 years, 3 of which as a Single Mom. We have a great relationship, which is so much more than my non-medicated Mom could give me at that age.
601. BOSSY said:
Bossy has a similar bump, but it's a Food Baby. Preferably one conceived with a piece of Strawberry rhubarb pie.
602. H said:
Last night my husband asked me if I wanted a baby, I thought of your blog and how I love reading about Leta and the funny things she does and says, although I'm sure at the time it's a nightmare and I think yeah as long as it's like Leta!
H
603. Just the Girl said:
I have had two healthy babies while on depression meds. It can be done and believe me the end result is so great!
604. dre said:
You GO girl! You look beautiful.
Thanks for sharing, as always. Those said dickwads should understand that this is strictly an issue between you, Jon and your doctors.
And as for the idiot "love hating dooce" #188 - F*ck off. Really.
605. Robyn said:
You look great, and your last paragraph is a total keeper!
606. Mickie said:
I only WISH I had known how to control my depression after my first child. I would have enjoyed my 2nd pregnancy so much more. I was miserable and sad and dark. I almost died after my 2nd child and I will not allow anyone to judge me for making the decision to take medication to help save me. I live with depression. Deal with it. I am a fantastic Mom and my kids are going to grow up with a woman who has enough sense to know she needs help.
It sounds like a few of your critics could use a few prozac crammed up their nether regions.
607. ReamORama said:
Yay Dooce! Glad to hear you are rolling with it-
608. Anonymous said:
You look great! And that goodness there is a drug out there that's safe during pregnancy! PS. you're second kid, twelve week bump makes my first kid, fifteen week bump look huge! :O
609. Kathy said:
oh man,I sure hope Tom Cruise doesn't troll Dooce!
He would have a field day with this ! ha
Heather--- it is beyond commendable that you are using this time to clear the air on this issue, tastefully and with caution. With all of those that read your site, I am sure that thought has crossed more minds than you care to entertain... but you are a medium and you are using your gift very well!
Rock on that baby-bump!
610. jessica said:
I suffer from depression myself. Before I was pregnant I was on effexor, neurotin and wellbutrin. Lots of meds I know. I had to go off all of them during my pregnancy. My pregnancy was hell and I had to go back on my medication ASAP after I gave birth. Because of this, I was unable to breastfeed.
I commend you for wanting to stay on top of your mental health. Keeping your mental health in check; is the only way that you are going to be able to be 100% in toon with your baby. I am also glad that Prozac works for you. It didn't do a damn thing for me. LOL.
611. Sonya said:
You are smart. You asked a medical professional you trust and that's the best thing to do! Any assholes who tell you you're doing something wrong are most likely NOT medical professionals. I'm pregnant too and I trust my doctors to give me the best advice and trust that they have much more experience with this than I do! Good luck and I can't wait to see more bump photos. I am 8.5 months pregnant and I sort of wish I had taken bump photos, but I started out chubby, so I would feel like I was just taking pictures of growing chub. Now that I am getting closer, I feel much better about my belly and have taken more photos!
612. Melissa K. said:
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!
I appreciate you posting this information on your meds your continuing struggle. I too take prozac for depression. My doctor has had to remind me not to stop taking it since I used to feel guilty about the stigma. Your website makes me feel normal and now I know, if I ever get lucky and blessed enough to get pregnant, I don't have to sacrafice my sanity to bring a new life into this world. Thank you! Bless you and your family!
613. LP in OK said:
Yay for the bump! So, curiosity got the better of me and I had to do some investigating to see what people were criticizing you for. I have to say, I'm not what I consider to be the most blog-savvy person, but I read several highly trafficked blogs and I'd never heard of most of these Dooce-hater people. These catty, catty, juvenile people! I had to laugh at some of them for sounding like such idiots.
So, all this to say, don't even give them a second thought. I'm sure it's easy to get somewhat caught up in the world o' bloggers and the drama they try to bring upon you, but just remind yourself that the negative trash they spew really doesn't matter, and they really ARE just dealing with their own issues. There's a reason you get an incredible amount of hits, and that's because you ROCK.
Congrats, again!
614. James Donald said:
Just come across your blog site through the Observer Magazine. I am based in Edinburgh Scotland and have a wee retail space called Concrete Wardrobe, I think you would like it! I am drawing inspiration from your blogging and trying to get into the same mindset for our one ... tricky but not impossible! (www.concretewardrobe.co.uk)
Look forward to reading more about your ongoing pregnancy!
Best Wishes
James D @ concrete wardrobe.
615. lynn said:
Full confession: one of the first things I was curious about after reading about the pregnancy was: will she be allowed to stay on medication? You've written so often about how it has helped you, and I'm so glad you can keep on it. What I'd love to see is a study showing that the babies of mothers taking antidepressants turn out to be really chill, laid-back kids!
616. Laura said:
Thank you for caring enough about your unborn child, Leta, your husband and yourself to continue your meds. Screw people who say you are only thinking of yourself. You are giving everyone the gift of a healthy, strong mother who can be an active part of the growing family.
And kudos for standing up for yourself!
I am so jealous of your baby bump!
617. Kim from NY said:
That was so refreshing. You just put me in a "I am woman hear me roar" type of mood. That is why I love you! Thank you:)
618. jax said:
FYI, all my doctors (obgyn, fertility specialist, rheumatologist, primary care, neurologist and therapist) have assured me that there is little risk involved with taking Prozac while being pregnant. If it assure YOUR mental health and reduces your stress, then by all means continue to take it. Congrats and blessings and hope for an easy pregnancy heather!~
619. Sherri said:
After 6 months of pregnancy and non-stop crying and unbelievable stress, my doc put me on prozac. I have a history of depression and felt that if I had to deal with ONE MORE THING I would waddle my pregnant self in front of a fast-moving bus. What's worse? Death or Prozac? And yeah, I felt all that guilt and thought people would reprimand me for taking medication while I was preggers. I cried when I took my first pill, unsure of what it would do to my little unborn baby. It kept her, and me, alive. That's what it did. So you know what? FUCK EVERYONE ELSE.
I commend you on doing what's right for you and your baby. And thank you for having the guts to talk about it publicly.
620. Wix said:
You're beautiful and you're building a beautiful family. Thank you for sharing at least a little bit of your lives with us, otherwise we'd think it was easy! Its not easy - it can be really hard, but despite it all still so totally worth it.
Shine on, Dooce.
621. Anonymous said:
If you WERE having twins, you'd probably abort it just so that your life could be spared from "chaos". Nice.
622. Rachel said:
Good for you Heather. All that matters is your health, the health of your baby, and what your doctor tells you. I am happy for you and your family!
623. Nikki said:
As the mother of 6 children.....yes SIX, I can say that I took Paxil with my 3rd child, and Prozac with the last 3. The ages of my children are 18, 14, 12, 9, 8 & 6.
They are all beautiful happy, healthy well adjusted, children with absolutely no behavior problems, no adhd/add etc. In fact, my 8yr old is a gifted student and my other children are all making me proud with their performance at school..
My point here is not to brag about my children, but to say that I did take those medications before, and throughout my pregnancies, and I did have those same fears while doing so, yet it seems the doctor was right, and my fears were unwarranted.
Me? I'm still batshit crazy. lol
624. erica said:
Congratulations on making a healthy decision for yourself and your baby. I work for a community mental health center and we always advise pregnant women to continue taking their meds (particularly anti-depressants) throughout pregnancy. It can help prevent symptom relapses in postpartum women. Congratulations on your new baby and good for you for continuing to take care of yourself. If you take care of yourself you will be better able to care for your babies!!
804816. Sherri said:
#621. Anonymous....you're an idiot.
625. Brenda Kidman said:
When my daughter was pregnant with my six year old granddaughter I went to all her doctor appointments. My daughter quit going to work (where she had health insurance) and quit getting out of bed.... just all the classic symptoms of depression.
I told the doctor about her not going to work (before she had actually lost her job) and I BEGGED the doctor to put her on antidepressants. I was so scared for her.
The doctor (a complete bitch) didn't ask her about antidepressants, she left the office and came back with information on welfare, medicade, food stamps and WIC. Yeah. I wanted to report her to the AMA.
When my daughter got pregnant this time with my grandson that is almost seventeen months old, the first thing she did was go on antidepressants. She makes the prettiest, healthiest babies and HATES being pregnant. Silly girl.
My grandson could not be more perfect and after being on the antidepressants while pregnant with him my daughter was able to breastfeed and really enjoy his time as a newborn instead of having to go to formula and being so sad she cried all the time. It made such a difference.
Good for you and your doctors.
626. DateWithKate said:
Your bump is awesome! It is not so awesome when you have the same one and are not pregnant, like myself. ( :
Your decision to stay on medication is the right thing to do. You've consulted with the right people about this and with yourself. You need to be healthy, physically and mentally, in order to welcome your baby into the world. Anyone who criticizes you can just fuck off. Happy Pregnancy, lady!
627. spacemom said:
You're skinny. I think we already knew that. Your pregnant body will be what it will. Congrats!
Anyway, stay on your meds. It is so worth it. I went off for my second child and let me tell you IT WAS FUCKING HELL! I was put back on them at 13 weeks because I was unaware I was happily playing with knives. There is a condition known as ante-partum depression that 20% of pregnant women go through.
628. Valerie said:
You look beautiful and content. Congratulations on your pregnancy!
629. Scargosun said:
Yea! You guys look so great! I am very interested to hear how everything goes with the Prozac b/c if we have kids, I will probably need to be on it as well. The reason we don't have kids is because it is something I am nervous about and also I have a 35 year old husband with the brain of a 12 year old. ;)
630. Anonymous said:
I am so proud of you. Not only do you think of your children but you consider yourself so you can be there for your children, Jon, CoCo and most importantly Chuck. I hope you have the most beautiful and healthy baby in the entire state of Utah. You deserve it.
631. Victoria Crupe said:
Heather-
First off you are a true inspiration to me!! You ROCK and I love how you tell it like it is and don't give the dickwads a chance to make you feel bad!! Keep it up, Motherhood suits you and I am a reader of your blog for life!! Best Wishes for the new little one growing in that beautiful bump, yourself and your family!
To the Dickwads-
LEAVE HEATHER ALONE!!!! PREGNANCY IS HARD ENOUGH WITHOUT YOU JUDGING EVERY MOVE SHE MAKES!!!
632. Heather Angele said:
Right on, Heather! I'm so perturbed by how society treats pregnant women, as if everything they do or don't do deserves to be judged. Please. I know my mom smoked and drank through all three of her pregnancies and then continued to smoke around us all throughout childhood we all turned out just fine - no major health problems. We're totally normal (well, that's subjective, I guess), intelligent, self-sufficient human beings. But it worries me the way women are treated when they're pregnant, especially when pregnant women's behavior becomes criminalized. Right now it's just for stuff like drug abuse, but seriously, I feel it could be used as a tool to further control and subjugate women if we don't stand up to it. And no, I'm not some paranoid freak. It's about reproductive rights, which includes when and how to reproduce. A good organization to look at - which can express these arguments far more eloquently than I - is the National Advocates for Pregnant Women. http://www.advocatesforpregnantwomen.org/ They're awesome!
633. Sarah said:
Heather, I am not that woman yet. But very soon I might be. Thanks for the encouragement to all of us, hopefully-soon first-time moms.
634. Laura said:
Perfectly lovely lil bump.
Stay healthy, stay happy.
635. Christina said:
Thanks for sharing the bump! I'm glad that your doing what you need to do to be the best MOM out there. Who gives a f*** what all those other people are saying. I'm sure their the one's who don't know how stressful it is to be a working mother. Just keep doing what your doing!
216433. Anonymous said:
You really, really need to keep your thoughts to yourself.
YOU are not Heather, and YOU are not a doctor.
You achieved rehabilitation without drugs. Good for you. No, seriously, that's a great accomplishment -- and for the record, I achieved mental health without drugs, too, after clinical depression (and I'm American).
BUT.
We are not Heather, and it doesn't matter what our treatment was. This is what Heather and her doctors have decided is the best treatment for Heather, her unborn child, and her family (because this affects Leta and Jon, too).
You at least managed to be reasonably civil, but really -- it's not your call, and no one actually asked for your opinion.
By the way -- I am now living in Europe, and so far have been happy with the healthcare we've received, even though it is sometimes different than the US.
Just because it's different doesn't mean it's wrong...it just means it's not the same.
636. alex said:
Yay Dooce! Keep rockin' the confident mom mojo... you're the boss of you and your babies! Can't wait to see more bump pics. Will show them to my husband so he'll get off my ass about procreating. Yeah, sorry to tell you this, but in my house, pregnancy pics are a cautionary tale. YOU look beautiful, tho!
637. Wetpaint said:
Aww...lookit your cute little bump...BUT I bet you can still do up your pants, am I right?? This is my first pregnancy and I suddenly POPPED out of my pants on some day between week 12 and week 13. There I was, minding my business, wearing my pants like normal, when suddenly the button wouldn't do up anymore! Aw well. hazards of the job.
So I think it's our place as "internet" to read your blog if we want to, and if we think you're some fetus abusing cow we can stop reading your blog.
I don't dig on the people who make comments like, I think on the last thread some lady said, "Oh thank goodness you're pregnant! That explains why you were so CRAZY insane lunatic maniacal during the elections!" or something like that. Because when you're pregnant you're not able to form a thoughtful, eloquently and modestly expressed opinion. Ever. On your own blog. But, maybe she was being tongue in cheek and I just didn't get it. Because I'm pregnant.
Take what you've gotta take! But if I see you smoking and tequila partying, the gloves are off... ;)
Good luck with the puking! and the heartburn and constipation to come! Joyful Joyful...
638. Courtney said:
*major cheer squad cheers* for you being smart enough to stay on the Prozac and being willing to be open about it for other women struggling with the decision....
639. Riddler said:
So what's wrong with dickwads. The provide us the with checks and balances in the world opinion poll.
My question: How would you feel if you stopped taking your meds right now?? Deep down do you need them??
640. Angela said:
As I was contemplating a similar decision, my best friend told me that few things were better for a baby than a healthy mom. You go, girl.
641. CDP said:
Good for you, and I'm glad you posted this, not just for the women who need the encouragement, but for your fans (like me) who are happy for your pregnancy but were a little worried about how you'd handle the depression. Stay in that Humvee and keep those machine guns blazing.
642. Nicole said:
Heh. I hear you.
I'm about 16 weeks pregnant and I catch hell for not giving up coffee. My response? "I gave up nicotine, I haven't had a drink since I found out. I am not giving up caffeine." My theory on antidepressants? If it makes for a happier, healthier mom, then it can't be all bad. Do what works for you.
And thanks for your post where you said you didn't like being pregnant; I don't like it either.
643. Anonymous said:
Crap. #216433 was actually in response to #168 or so, who was commenting about how it's just not done in Europe. (to be fair, he/she is at least a polite hater.)
Whatever. didn't realize that 'reply' tacks it onto the end, instead of stuffing it right up behind the dork who said it in the beginning.
Yes, I'm slightly neurotic, because I just couldn't keep from clarifying that so people aren't reading this page going WTF?
644. Beth said:
You have to take care of yourself before you can even begin to take care of anyone else. Those who have never had to make such a decision are usually the ones to throw stones first.
LOVE your sense of humor!
645. Cee said:
Prozac is breastfeeding friendly too, I believe. :)
646. Sarcastica said:
People are asshats, and chances are those people emailing and ranting about you "killing your baby" are just talking out of their asses. They don't have the medical degree, so their opinion doesn't matter...I know you already know this, but still lol. It's something I had to face too - although not about meds, about "natural birth". Apparently I'm a horrible person for not getting a midwife, meanwhile my medical condition requires me to have a full team of doctors near by to ensure that all goes smoothly.
647. Anonymous said:
Thank you Heather, for being so brave and honest. It means a lot to a lot of people.
648. Natalie said:
What gets me is that the authors of those vile, hateful websites actually believe that it's perfectly acceptable to be a complete asshole and still throw stones.
Congratulations on the pregnancy, you appear to have "the glow", unless it was photoshop. Your bump is smaller than the bump I had while I was still thin and not pregnant. Now, I could carry three babies in my 'bump'. hehe.
649. Cee said:
Forgot to mention, there is a fantastic reference guide by Dr. Hale about safe medication for pregnancy and breastfeeding.
650. Anonymous said:
Awesome entry for all those women out there who think they are crazy for wanting to do-away with their own offspring...hey... wait... maybe, just maybe, a nice little pill will help you out.
I know it did for me! And those two rugrats are running around in the dungeon still, thanks to prozac.
651. Lazarus said:
Dooce, I love you and your honesty. I can relate to you so well, as I'm sure so many of us can! I even love the fact that you were once mormon even more! YOU ROCK and you need to take care of yourself as well, it's obvious you are a wonderful mother. Screw all those judgemental people, I find the people who are the most judgemental are usually the ones with the worst secrets!
652. Talon said:
*giggle*
Also, I have to say I find Leta's constant assertion that the new baby is a girl and she will be a little sister funny.
Because I SO NEVER WANTED a sister, so much to the degree that my mother pregnant with my last sibling worried that it would be a girl and I would kill it. Um...almost kinda sorta literally.
I don't do the whole sharing the spotlight well it seems.
But Bryce William was born on May 25...the DAY OF MY PRESCHOOL GRADUATION for which I have never forgiven him.
Leta...welcome to the world of being the big sister. It is the job that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on my friend.
And it is all your mother's fault. And if she ever tries to get you to fire her, (mine pulls that all the time) just add years to her mothering sentence. My mother can't die until roughly the year 3000 now, and it MUST work because she's had two brain aneurysms and breast cancer and just had her gall bladder out.
*hands out sage, big sisterly advice because my morning sickness advice is to just puke*
653. JP said:
Good for you...
It feels so strange to be so happy for someone I don't know in "real life" but can't help it. Very excited for your family. Congrats!
654. mommyknows said:
You look fabulous!
Ah, who cares what all those nuts have to say? Then again, just by commenting here, I AM one of those nuts, who just have to give you my opinion.
Stay well.
655. Sandy said:
I love the pic of your lil baby swimming! ;-)
Anyway, I'll see your bump and raise you about 15 inches! You're so nice and slim!
Congrats on everything and here's to a smooth pregnancy and a girl for Leta.
656. soukii said:
Hi Heather. I'm 27 weeks pregnant and also on prozac. It was a difficult decision to make, but I was barely functioning and that was even less healthy for me and my family. I just want to wish you lots of luck and thank you for being brave enough to take one for TEAM PROZAC! I admire your strength and courage.
657. Sarah said:
wow Heather, you are seriously TAMING THE INTERNETS!! Not a malicious comment to be seen! woo hoo!!!
And Amen to your post, you do what you have to do girl. And ya, I'd kill for your tummy without being 12 wks preggo.. seriously!!!!!
658. stella from vancouver said:
Rock on, Heather. You are such an inspiration to human kind and I love that you just kill those high-n-mighty freaks with kindness (or loosely veiled sarcasm). I have also heard from my friends that 2nd pregnancies show way more. You look gorgeous and congrats on the fact that you are not having twins.
It is comforting to know that you also experienced a miscarriage in your journey to get pregnant. I am still trying and am trying to stay positive and trust that it will happen eventually. Keep sharing your wonderful wisdom with all of us. It is greatly appreciated.
659. GPS said:
Anyone who posts nasty comments on other people's personal websites (especially the majority who remain anonymous) has his/her own problems. Oh, and it also means you're huge (not you -- your site!)
Your story helped convince me to remain on Zoloft for my entire pregnancy and afterward (also, I'm highly irritable off meds). Good luck!
660. Liz said:
I just wanted to say that you and your bump look absolutely adorable and I am completely thrilled for all of you. :)
661. flybigd said:
quote:
"she knows that if she does she'll have to listen to some dickwad condemn her for trying to kill her baby. I want that woman to know that I am surrounded by those dickwads, they have my email address, my mailing address, their own websites where they go on and on about how sad it's going to be for my children to grow up with such a crazy mother (Hi, guys! Thanks for the traffic!), that I shouldn't be allowed to have another baby."
There was a link on MSN a day or two ago to an article about 6 women bloggers and I was struck by how many of them talked about their blogs a "safe" place to express themselves. How naive. The Internet has never been "safe" as you well know. Haters aren't welcome anywhere but they are all over the place anyway. I guess those bloggers will be surprised someday.
Congratulations on the pregnancy and take good care of yourself.
662. Photography By Shay said:
Congrats - I luv ya Heather.
Hey - I'm in Utah; can I come over and shoot your maternity and newborn pics? :)
663. Wendy from NJ said:
SHUT UP!
Can I just say my "bump" is waaaaaaaay bigger than yours and I am NOT pregnant and gave birth to my third and last child MORE THAN FIVE YEARS AGO!!!
Skinny people!!! I swear!!!!
;-)
664. liz said:
You are adorable with your little bump and I am glad you are healthy. Congratulations again!
665. Jeanne said:
Dooce - congrats! And, on the twin thing, I'm with you. That sounds too much like a pre-school and my lack of patience is the reason I am NOT a teacher!!!!
666. Heather M. said:
From one Heather to another...you rock! Tell them all to go to hell. Do what is right for you. It is that easy and that simple. Love your bump and hope you start feeling better soon.
667. Lisa said:
Some of us aren't pregnant and have bigger bumps that you Heather! :) You have to remember at 12 weeks the baby is the size of a peanut. I used to be more obsessed with how I look and with both my babies I really didn't show until month #5 All of a sudden it looked like I had eaten a beach ball. You know when your arms get big that it is time to cut it out with the Doritos! Good luck to all!
668. Michelle said:
Congratulations on your pregancy! you will do fine. Your intuition which has gotten you this far will let you know the rest of way of your new baby journey.
Depression runs in my Fathers side of the family and missed my sister but not me. In my early years I took prozac but had to quit because it made me gain weight which in turn made me feel worse about myself.
Then I found this book called "Potatoes NOT Prozac" It summed me up to a "T" and changed my life.
You can find it on amazon, 'used' - for pennies...
http://www.amazon.com/Potatoes-Seven-Step-Stabilize-Cravings-Recognize/d...
669. southerngirl said:
You are woman, hear you roar! You go, girl! Standing up for yourself, and others, is an example we can all learn from.
I know we need to be concerned about the health of the unborn baby, but let's not go overboard, ok, people? I mean my generation's parents smoked, drank, and wife swapped while pregnant and we all turned all all right (more or less).
670. d3 voiceworks said:
The main thing your baby is saying is : Keep those potato chips coming. I mean, if you can, Mom.
671. MS said:
I have no idea if you actually read all these comments but I had the best explanation when I was pregnant with my second child of why you get bigger faster with subsequent pregnancies. My midwife told me to think of it like a balloon, you blow it up once or twice, the next time you try and blow it up it's a little bit "stretched" already. Think of your uterus like that balloon :).
As for the Prozac. I am a complete granola hippie and I medicated my child from age 7 with SSRI's. She's getting ready to start college and still takes them daily. I am certainly not going to be throwing any stones.
672. MiaLexie said:
I would a million times rather be yelled at about my meds than have someone suggest I eat my own placenta. Especially while suffering from morning sickness. Aagh.
Congrats Heather!
673. Penny said:
Damnit, I looked bigger on day 1 of my pregnancy than you do now. It's impossible to fathom there was a 15 week old fetus hiding in that stomach of yours last time either. Hrmmph.
Loved the prozac. Not on it now, but the side effects were awesome.
674. achrisash said:
I'm so happy for you! Thank you for putting it all out there- you don't know how often I read your blog with tears of gratitude in my eyes. Over the next months I will be here cheering for you, John, Leta, and baby!
675. Dawn said:
Good for you and Screw all those Dickwads! Congratulations and beautiful baby bump, which btw is what I look like every day and I'm a thin, physically active 40 yr old. You look great.
676. Addie said:
Good for you. Kick their ass, sea bass.
Or something.
I think it's very brave of you to continually open yourself up to the dickwads of the world... and very wise to print off their opinions and drive over them forcefully.
677. Anonymous said:
Not pregnant, never was, and am now too old (mid 50's), but my mom was on tranquilizers the entire time she was pregnant with me (due to some extraneous issues) and I turned out okay.
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I wish you good health throughout (both mental and physical).
804817. Caitlin said:
Ivan? Lol.
678. Heather B. said:
Congrats!!
Have you decided to find out what you are having?
What about names...it is hard to come up with something
original. Especially after Leta.
I have four girls and have managed to stay away from the trends of Olivia,Sophia, and Grace.
Fancy that!
Babies are great.
679. Keri said:
Heather, thank you so much for your honesty about depression during and after pregnancy. It has been a great comfort to read about your experience.
I have been taking Prozac now for almost 6 years, through two pregnancies and years of breastfeeding, and my children (now aged 3 and 5) are happy, healthy, and thriving. After a few awful months of trying to taper off this year, I fully admit that I can't function without Prozac. And, like you, I'll be damned if I let anyone judge me for that. I will stay on this medication for the rest of my life, if it means I can be here to love and take care of my family. Whatever it takes!
Good luck, and stay strong, knowing you have the support and understanding--and admiration--of many, many women just like you.
680. Anonymous said:
Heather.....
I know you're bigger person than that Chicken Little over on Poops on Peeps but, still, you should go over there and raise a little hell with that idiot C.L.. And for the record, I can't believe that she can slander you and your family without any repercussions. Of course she's jealous of your popularity and the money you generate from this blog. Still, what she does is wrong and she should not be allowed to continue on with what I consider abuse towards your daughter, leta.
681. Kim said:
Women always show earlier with their second (and third and so on) babies. They also tend to gain more weight overall.
682. shannon said:
HEATHER-
yay for baby bumps and YAY for salt and vinegar potato chips! when i was preggo with my cooper-douper i ate like a bag of those a day! and always for breakfast!
blessings
shannon
683. Cranky said:
I spent the summer witnessing the daily agony of a co-worker who went off her anti-depressant medication so she could get pregnant with no meds on board. I don't have any words to descrive the anxiety, depression and self-doubt that ensued when the meds were out of her system; she was almost non-functional for three months. Now she is pregnant, back on meds, and doing well. I wouldn't wish her summer of hell on my worst enemy.
684. Kimberly said:
I have that bump, but it's pumpkin pie. You look fabulous!
685. Elizabeth said:
Becky at number 65 made me tear up. I feel the exact same way. Thank you and congrats. Standing and clapping for you and your (growing) family.
686. Chantal said:
You are one of the bravest women on the internet and I applaud you!
36288. Anonymous said:
I too have Crohn's disease and was on Imuran during both of my pregnancies and I now have two beautiful children. Hope this helps.
687. Matin said:
Wow, that is a real bump, I am so happy for you Heather. even thogh I dont have any kids yet and never been pregnant, i found your post very reassuring, in fact i find most of your posts reassuring, inspiring and very brave. Now i feel all broody and can't wait to have a little one of my own:-)i am looking forward to read all about your experiences with pregnancy just the same as with your beautiful Leta.
Lots of love
X M
688. Craig said:
I think its great your preggers again and more power to the prozac. I am the Dad of twins girls (11 months old) and I can tell you its not so bad however they were our first kids so I dont know any different anyway.
--ck
689. Leslie said:
Hi Heather,
I worked at a Children's Research Hospital for years. We had a number (at least 10) studies (peer reviewed, published in top ten journals, meaning real studies) on pregnant women remaining/going off of anti-depresants through our Motherisk program. I can tell you unequivocally that those who remained on the anti-depressants had much MUCH better outcomes for both the mother and child...EVERY single time.
Congrats and good luck!
L.
690. Writefromthe heart said:
I recently lost a baby - it was very, very early in the pregnancy- but let me tell you, while there was no nausea, there was absolutely intolerable heartburn. From day one. I swear it. I knew I was pregnant before I missed my period, because before my breasts were even sore the entire lining of my insides felt like it had been lit ON FIRE.
Imagine eating chilli peppers, or the spiciest Indian Vindaloo you have ever tasted (or not tasted seeing as your tastebuds had been singed off on the way down). It's like that only the burn does not subside.
I think I might prefer contemplating the taste of cornbread stuffing mixed with stomach acid. Or curling up in the fetal position and not moving.
691. deb said:
its very nice that you have an army of supporters here to back up your decision, but if you don't think that taking a brain altering medication while pregnant will affect your baby, you are simply selfish, and quite possibly crazy, but hey, you've already admitted to that!
i personally cannot believe that with your medical history and an already challenging child, you would willingly put yourself in a position to make your life even more challenging. how much medication do you think you can take to make/keep your life "normal"?
wheres the breaking point? you don't know do you? so you'll just keep forging ahead and medicate that problem when you come to it.
159408. Tracylea said:
You sure ;p I took lexapro as well and my daughter is also three and a bit of an ass herself :)
692. Katie said:
It is my opinion that one should listen to one's doctors and heed their medical advice and not the advice of the internet peanut gallery.
693. Anonymous said:
What a cute bump! Mine is about four times that size, and my "baby" will be four in a week. Congrats on this pregnancy. You are adorable.
I really wish you hadn't referenced the idiot with the craptastic blog. It's exactly the "proof" she needed to fuel her. You really read her blog! She's said all along you do! She's validated! Ugh. I think she may bother me more than she does you. I have a dream that you and the other A-list blogger that she loves to rip will come together and expose her. Do it! Please!
694. RobinM said:
Whenever those people start with their unsolicited and stupid advice please think of all your readers who are 100% behind you. That support you and wish they could crap in the cornflakes of those dolts for you.
Carry on ma'am.
695. Starr said:
I took Lexapro during my first pregnancy, and nursed for a year. I was on Prozac during my second pregnancy, and continue to take it while I nurse. My children are doing just fine. Both are happy and healthy. You are totally making the right decision. It's best for everyone. And when the baby is here, you may enjoy it more this time around.
696. Mandy said:
Seriously, that's what I looked like at 5 weeks. HA! I commend you for keeping on with your Prozac. Pregnancy is way to hard on us physically to be dealing with a weak mentality. Good luck!
697. Mary said:
Re "hidden" twins, no, you are NOT silly. My husband's friend had one baby show up on her 12-week ultrasound and -- whoops! -- at 18 weeks, there were two in there.
698. Rachel said:
Heather, thanks for speaking out about taking your meds while pregnant! A healthy baby needs a happy mom. I admire you for putting yourself out there! Eff the bashers!
699. Pregnant lady said:
Girl, I'm two weeks behind you and my pants stopped fitting weeks ago. Bah. I'm going to be HUGE.
700. Aimee Greeblemonkey said:
As someone on Lexapro and not pregnant, never going to be pregnant again, and freaks when they Diet Sprite on the carpet, I say do what works for you, Jon, Leta, the baby and your doctor.
P.S. Congrats, lady.
701. Kati said:
I am one of those women. One who has been struggling with the decision of whether or not to stay on my medication. After 10 years of being on Zoloft (since I was 17), this last spring I was finally able to admit that it hadn't been helping me for a long time. Plus, I just couldn't deal with the side effects anymore, namely the fact that unless there was an immaculate conception in my future, I wouldn't ever be having a baby unless I actually WANTED to have sex. So my doctor switched me to Wellbutrin and it has been like the difference between night & day for me. But now my husband and I have decided to try and have a baby soon and I have spent the last few months being terrified at the thought of going off the medication, so much so that I have come up with all kinds of excuses for "not being ready" to have a baby yet. When I found out you were pregnant again, I so selfishly hoped that you would discuss your decision about whether or not you would be staying on your meds. When I read your words today, I started crying. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you for having the courage to share your decision with your readers. You are such an amazingly kick-ass woman.
702. April said:
Heather, just wanted to add to the voices saying, "Only you know what is best for you." With your past I can see why you'd be nervous and take preventative measures and I hope that everything goes as smoothly as it can this time around. Keep posting bump pics---you know we love them! Take care and try not to barf too much!
703. Michelle said:
Congratulations on the baby (and it's nice of them to reassure you that there's no possible way that it could be twins - I have no clue how parents of multiple newborns ever handle it and stay remotely sane).
Anyone who criticizes you for continuing on your medication is whacked on the head, to be perfectly honest. After all, you spoke to a doctor who actually knows about the drug and the circumstances so it's all good.
704. Julie said:
That's not a bump, that's a gas bubble, lol. I'm 18 weeks (with girl #2)and I look about 9 months in comparison to that. Rock on skinny bitch. LOL.
705. Scott-5x5 said:
Someone has probably already said this here (I don't have time to read the 9 MILLION comments), but I think the biggest difference is in the photography! Love a good white balance. :-) That's one thing that burns me about you guys. You're all that and damn good photographers too. (Are you going to get the Mark II?)
Excellent post, as always.
Scott
706. Anonymous said:
Hi Heather!
I give you SO MUCH CREDIT for taking control of your illness! My mother suicided as a result of post partem and it (and other things) has frightened me away from giving birth. I think that you are very brave to do it again. Screw anyone who tries to tell you what to do! It's your life and your body. I can't wait to see your new little one! Hang in there! You're the best!
36289. Anonymous said:
Until your family has taken all 28 or 29 pills and three meds and shot methotrexate into their own butts, you're the authority on CD.
707. Anonymous said:
eep, that was for the Crohn's sufferer pages back.
708. Anonymous said:
Your face is so jacked. WTF is wrong w. your nose? You are beyond ugly. I am glad you found somebody to procrate with. Sorry your kid is ugly and has issues. I hope this baby isn't an ugly retard like that other creature.
709. Nyssa said:
Of course complete strangers are going to tell you how wrong you are but at the end of the day....only you know what is best for you (and your doctor).
http://nyssasdream.blogspot.com/
710. Mary said:
Oh, how I remember the days when my abdomen looked like yours. Relish it, enjoy it.......for one day you will be 54 years old with an old lady's abdomen.
And I swear to God it happens overnight.
Congrats on the bump. Looking forward to following along!
711. Tracy said:
Way to go, Heather! My depression hit after my second pregnancy, so we were blind-sided. I literally had both kids and the car packed and ready to leave while my husband desperately held onto me in every way he could. Thank God for him, and I'm not saying that lightly. THANK GOD. But, I'm also thankful for the drugs that helped lift me out of that dark place. I know exactly what you mean when you talk about the signs to watch for and the tools to help. We live with that every day. I expect that people will trust me to take care of me and my family. I congratulate you and look forward to reading the journal of this magnificent pregnancy. Yay for you guys!
712. Katie said:
Congratulations, Heather!! I think my daughter is about Leta's age (a little older) and now we're pregnant "together" again. :) I am so glad you can stay on your medicine- pregnancy hormones and morning sickness are quite enough of a ride without other complicating factors, amen? God bless this pregnancy and baby and all of it for you!
713. Deborah said:
Bravo Dooce! Thanks once again for being a voice for many, many of us. And you look beautiful!
714. Janet said:
I love the assertive pregnant Heather! Bravo for speaking up; I think you've made an excellent informed decision! Isn't it too bad that because of all the hate blogs out there (or is there just that one?), you have to defend your decisions to do what is best for you and your baby?
162000. Debbie said:
Riiiiight! So *that's* why there are so few babies being born in parts of India, South East Asia, China, etc. Uh, huh.
Good grief.
Sorry about your mother-in-law.
715. Georgia said:
I have a question for other dooce readers: what other blogs do you read/recommend? I noticed that Heather doesn't post a list of blogs she reads/enjoys, and as a 30-year old female who has struggled with depression most of her adult life, I have yet to find another blog that resonates the way that dooce does. I'm esepcially interested in blogs dealing with mental illness (and coping with life in general). I can't seem to find any that aren't totally clinical -- or morose!
Thanks!
716. Diana said:
#708 Shut the fuck up you 'tard.
Heather, Jon and Leta,
Congrats!
I don't want to jump the gun...but I want to put my two cents in for the name before you start getting too many to read!
Girl: Lyric ( I have always loved the name, and it goes well with Leta)
Boy: No Junior!!
Can't wait to hear more about the new baby on the way,
Diana
717. Katie said:
You have a beautiful bump! And I think each pregnancy it's earlier that you see the bump, as things have been "pre-stretched" if you know what I mean.
Glad you are doing what you need to for your own wellbeing. Screw those who think they need to think for you!
718. Sol said:
YOU GLOW!
719. catherine said:
Exactly. You are perfectly capable of making decisions about your body, your life, your baby. Me and all the other women on the planet say Amen to that.
720. Val said:
This time, you and Jon will be prepared for the post-baby craziness and will hopefully be prepared. They say kids are sometime opposites - maybe baby #2 will like Coco!
Ha Ha!
721. Kristen from MA said:
Fuck all the haters, Heather! Just fuck 'em all! And fuck Tom Cruise, too!
722. TXMatt said:
I was curious...what does that say about me? A healthy baby needs a healthy mother first and foremost, you should do whatever that means for you and screw the unsolicited advice. Congratualtions, and good luck. BTW highly reccomend Trumpette baby socks, they don't come off and avoids those stares when you have a one socked baby:)
723. Amy J said:
Heather,
I too am a diagnosed crazy mama, I too take medication and have with my last 2 children. They are perfectly wonderful and healthy, and even better they are still alive because I stayed medicated and was able to care for them, and still do as a matter of fact. I'm so happy for you, and I loved your analogy of the Humvee, and it's totally true, I think after number 1, my 2 and 3 were much easier to deal with. However, I'm not glutten for punishment, and even though I live in UT I'm not having anymore babies, I don't feel the need to multiply and replenish the earth on my own.
724. Lindsey @ iruninheels.com said:
Congratulations Heather! It was such a privilege to meet you and Jon in L.A. at your meet and greet. I think Leta's blessed to have you as parents and this new little one will be too.
725. Jana said:
G-d bless SSRI's!
And are you sure that bump is not Chuck's pup? I'm seeing a resemblance ;)
726. C.A.R. said:
Oh my goodness! This is great news. I am 13 weeks today!! It's our first and we're so excited. When is your due date? Our babies will be best friends. I just know it!! ;)
727. Bre said:
I just wanted to add a positive comment to help drown out the jerks:
Congratulations. I know (well, I guess I don't technically KNOW, because I don't know you personally or anything, but I'm pretty sure anyway) that this baby is long-hoped for and much-wanted and much-loved, and I wish for you an easy pregnancy, both mentally and physically.
728. Anonymous said:
I have 3 kids. All were concieved whilst on Prozac. I'd rather be a medicated mom that a suicidal/homicidal mom.
729. smokeyJoe said:
lovely lady humps!
730. Meredith - Atlanta said:
"...someone is out there right now trying to make the decision about whether or not to stay on her medication".
I am one of the women you are talking about, and I thank you.
731. Lyndsey said:
Congrats on the pregnancy! Love your blog and I so enjoy reading it on a daily basis. Screw the haters, they are just freaking jealous of you and your family, they need to get a life (which is why they are bashing you on your blog - they don't have a life!). Keep on blogging. Smooches!
732. Anonymous said:
You are an enormous whiner.You are pregnant, not terminally ill. And oh, by the way, you are NOT the first person to ever be pregnant or to have some discomfort while pregnant.
Obviously you are obsessed with yourself and I actually feel for your children. And on a happier note, your daughter is quite cute despite the nasty comments to the contrary.
733. Pink said:
Couple of things:
A. Dooce has made a nice entreprenurial/capitalistic living off of this blog.
B. Dooce has "put herself out there," much like the Duggars, Little People, Big World, et al, and as a result puts herself and her family out in the world to be scrutinized. It's that little cause/effect thingie.
C. As a result of B, people know she takes meds. They will question.
D. As a result of A, she is obligated to answer to keep her readership afloat. It's not all butterflies, unicorns, and selflessness for the "greater good," 'ya know. There's a personal and financial vested interest at play, and especially more so with a new addition to the family.
E. Drugs are drugs. I don't give a rat's ass how anyone would like to spin it. Some are "safe" during pregnancy and some aren't. I'm guessing the "safeness" depends on whether it is FDA approved and/or illegal. (Neurontin was never approved for depression, only marketed that way, but that's neither here nor there at this point). Some poster back above (sorry, didn't get the number..and paraphrasing) said that her child was "twitchy" from the withdrawal from Zoloft, but hey...I guess all babies are "twitchy?" And I guess a twitchy baby is cool, so long as it is not twitchy from crack. Or something. Is Prozac the same? Probably not, but it is still a drug and a brain-altering one at that. I work in the medical field. I am hard pressed every day to find ONE (yes ONE) person who is not on an antidepressant or anxiolytic of some sort/brand. It's big business. And you shouldn't have to "wean" off of anything...unless it is addictive. You don't "wean" off of Motrin or Tylenol.
F. Finally, do I care? No. But, yah, I don't get all of the "high fives" either from this, due to reasons A through E.
734. Suzette said:
I'm so proud of you for facing the issue right up front and heading the bizybodies off aT the pass.
The bump is way cute.
Sorry you've got the ickies!
735. Anonymous said:
A real twin nightmare is miscarrying them and never being able to have children after that.
This is what happened to my best friend.
You are a real piece of work.
Congratulations on your upcoming second child.
736. jen said:
you're awesome. thanks for sharing your life with us...and this new one to come.
737. kndaf23 said:
Firstly, you look great.
Secondly, #188 is not only a grammatically challenged douche-bag but methinks a bit of a racist too. As an African-American woman reader, I love dooce. I don't love the commenter who seemed to imply that there was something wrong with the shape of your kid's lips. What a jackass! Thanks #188 for reminding me that there are still douchey people out there who will always remain ignorant no matter what century they live in. Keep on keeping on Heather!!
738. Anonymous said:
I can't say thank you enough for this post. I had completely given up on ever having a child of my own until I read your post. I had asked my doc about continuing antidepressants while I tried to get pregnant and her unequivocal response was that I absolutely had to give up my meds. I sought second, third, fourth opinions, and heard the same thing. I finally bit the bullet and stopped taking Effexor, the first medicine that had ever made any difference in my quality of life. After two weeks of sobbing, rage, debilitating headaches, and general insanity, I deemed myself unfit to care for myself, nevermind nurture a baby. I discarded my hopes of becoming a mother. Your post has given me renewed hope. Maybe I, too, can find a doctor who understands that this is not an either/or choice -- that my desire to become a mother does not have to come at the expense of my own health.
739. Trisha@momdot said:
OMG, can my dickwads come hang out at your site? Stop sending your stalkers over to me. Im about ready to start an I HATE ME fan club over here.
trisha
740. Shelley said:
Dude! Is no one going to comment about the woman who suggested eating your own placenta??? Ew!
I read through ~50 comments and didn't see any negative ones, so hopefully your crazy detractors have all gone away.
I am so going to talk to my husband about having a little placenta snack after birth. (Afterbirth? he he!) Can you email courtney (comment 40) and ask her how she prepares it? (with a side of fava beans and a nice chianti?)
-Shelley (due May 21)
741. Pinky said:
Congratulations Heather! I absolutely love your blogs, you say everything just the way I WANT to say it but can't seem to get it all out. My name's Heather too :) AND I'm 36 week preggers and TOTALLY ready to have this baby.
Your bump...STILL smaller than my bump even when I'm not preggers. Good luck and thanks so much for your blogs, they always make me laugh :)
742. Kimmad said:
Just started reading your blog recently, and your post today prompted me to reply - even though I hardly ever comment on blogs. I've got 3 kids (yeah - count em) and suffer depression. For some strange reason, I decided to go off meds before the first two, and because of the type of med I was on with the third, had to go off (wasn't considered "safe" yet). Then almost immediately fell into a deep abyss. It sucked, and I'm sure made it worse for everyone around me. So I went back on meds - prozac specifically - and it was THE BEST THING I ever did. And my baby is fine. In fact, he is the cutest, most lovable little boy. I read a quote while I was going through that decision, and I live by it: If mom's not happy, nobody's happy. So keep yourself happy, and screw what anybody else says! :)
743. Heather said:
You look great! Kudos for your decision to stay sane while pregnant. Or, at least, relatively sane. But once you're a parent it's all relative, right?
Now, go eat something already.
744. Stephanie said:
I, too, have a history of depression, and the worst depression of my life hit when I was about 6 weeks pregnant. I had halved my dosage, thinking it would be somehow "safer". Instead, utter despair ensued. I took Zoloft throughout my pregnancy and even participated in a study on antidepressant medication during pregnancy where I was closely monitored. I even had to increase the dosage because the increase in blood during pregnancy made my usual dosage ineffective. ZERO problems with my daughter, and I skipped postpartum depression entirely.
Research shows that untreated depression and anxiety during pregnancy can be quite harmful to a developing fetus.
Good for you for doing what's best.
745. April said:
All I have to say is to hell with all the negativie people who want to give you crap about having a baby. You don't need it in your life.
Congratulations on the baby. Your baby bump is adorable.
April
746. Anonymous said:
I took Prozac through 2 pregnancies-gave birth to 2 perfectly wonderful, intelligent kids. It was take the Prozac or become a raving psycho pregnant woman-no difficulty making THAT decision!
Best of luck to you and your family...
747. Marisa said:
This is, quite possibly, the best post I have ever read from you. I love how you just DONT GIVE A SHIT about what other people say.
748. Rayna said:
Congratulations on the babe! Happy for you that it is only one, though you would've figured out a way to deal with two had it been that way.
I found after having had just a bit of depression with my son that just being aware and knowledgeable about it and my moods prevented any bad dips with my daughters (yeah, twins, wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.)
749. Stephanie said:
I took Zoloft through both of my pregnancies (after my own miscarriage) and am glad that I did. I sincerely hope that this pregnancy is a smooth one, and that you won't have to deal with severe PPD (or any PPD for that matter!) like you did with Leta. Good for you for being pro-active and aware of what to look for this time around.
And just send any evil trolls back to troll-land, along with their unsolicited advice and discouraging judgments.
750. sarah said:
you. rule. so much. congrats on the baby!
751. Anonymous said:
Hey, if you're having one with that wannabe bump, then I must be having octuplets.
And I'm not even pregnant...
Good luck to you!
M
752. Jessie said:
Thank you for being brave enough to post this. I am one of the many women who needed to read it. I've struggled with depression for years. I've been on and off meds for years. Two years ago I went off Zoloft because my husband and I were starting to try for a baby. Two years later, no baby and I had slowly but surely lost my God damn mind. I'm on Wellbutrin now and am doing much better. We're also actively trying NOT to conceive at the moment, I needed to get my head back on straight. I'd prefer not to remain on meds if (when?) I ever do get pregnant but I am realizing more and more that that is just not realistic for me. And that's okay. Because a healthy baby starts with a healthy mama. Anyway, thank you for posting this. Thank you for saying what I needed to hear.
753. beeps said:
beautiful bump, dooce! i have the same one and the baby is 4!
seriously, took lexapro throughout my 2nd pregnancy and if anything, he's a little more mellow than the first one...do what feels right for you and give the rest hell.
754. anna cordes said:
heather,
i'm continually encouraged and humbled and inspired by your words. just sayin ;O)
755. Allison said:
I'm not sure you'll ever even see this e-mail, but to hell with "those people". I have dealt with depression, and though I don't know how it was for you I know for me it SUCKED. Big donkey balls sucked. So good for you for doing what is right for your and yours. And you're bump is cute :)
756. Norah said:
Rock on. I'd been curious about medication during pregnancy, though it never even occurred to me to wonder if you might do something that would harm your very wanted child. Because of course you wouldn't. Sheesh. Thanks for addressing the issue, and thanks for giving hope to those possible someday parents who suffer from depression.
757. annie said:
I've been reading Dooce since 2003, when I had my first (and so far only) child and suffered from post natal depression. It was a great support to me to read about someone in a similar situation, with everything to be happy about (healthy baby, good marriage, no serious financial problems, etc.), who was as irrationally miserable. We took the decision a year ago to try to have another child (not lightly taken). Fingers crossed. You have been an inspiration.
758. annie said:
though, mind you, I have a bigger belly now.
759. kristen said:
I read that nothing is working for your morning sickness. No tips here, nothing worked for mine either. hang in there is all the advice I have, oh and maybe use a hair clip so you can better balance over the toilet.
760. Deb said:
You know, I have this friend that tells me all the time how she just can't believe that I need to take antidepressants, and do I know what that does to one's personaility in the long term, blah blah blah... And guess what? She smokes pot every day!! Because that's so much better for you and won't affect your personality one bit. People are amazingly ignorant.
Hope you have a happy, healthy pregnancy!
761. Janie said:
Maybe you don't need another person saying the same thing--"great post, you're absolutely right that the baby is yours and you will do what is best for her/him and everyone else can shut the F up, don't worry-be happy".
Then again, when the trolls annoy you with their witchy tales you can go back and count the thousands of posts you have agreeing with you! So here's another!
And congratulations on the addition to your lovely family, Heather. I missed out on having children and just as with Leta's development, I look forward every day to the gory details of your pregnancy and the hilarious way you relay them to us.
We all (99% of us!!!) love you and wish you the best!
Janie
762. Tina said:
Oh no! Now I feel bad about my comment yesterday in which I recommended Zofran for nausea but then said that I felt weird taking medication while pregnant. I am not a hater and am a lifelong-on-and-off-antidepressant kind of gal. Thanks for standing up for us; in all our forms, pregant or otherwise.
763. Amy said:
As my ob and my kids pediatrician always said, "Healthy mom means healthy baby - whatever it takes to make that happen." Congrats to you and your family! You look great!
764. hihorosie said:
I love your baby bump! I have no doubt you know what you're doing to take care of yourself and your baby. Take care and all the best to you!
765. Leah said:
I was on Zoloft my entire pregnancy, and am still taking it (and I breastfeed). My high anxiety/panic attacks would have put my baby at more of a risk than the crazy meds.
766. Sara said:
Screw what anyone else says. Most people don't get that in addition to postpartum depression, women, including me, can get perinatal depression. It can be as crippling. I was on Welbutrin during my pregnancy and while breast feeding, with my doctor's permission. Without it, I don't know if me or my son would still be here. The depression and anxiety was that overwhelming.
767. Anonymous said:
I'm totally trying to get preggers, and I'm totally staying on my Wellbrutrin. :) Thanks for sharing!
768. theparakeet said:
you are blessed to be so tall. my bump came way early and way big and then...i was a balloon. you can see pics on my blog. not pretty :) but now there is a pretty baby boy - all worth it
769. Lin said:
I love your honesty....even about the touchy issues.
Does anyone else see the Bat signal? My dh can't be the only one.
770. mari caplan said:
If my stomach was even half that flat at the beginnning of any of my three pregnancies I'd have been stoked. You look FANTASTIC bigger bump and all. And I was on prozac for two of my 3 pregnancies and they all came out fine. In fact they are still fine 14 and 7 years later. Their mom is still nuts but you can't have everything.
771. kristin said:
you. are. the. best.
No wonder you needed a choc chip cookie so desperately in LA!
Why don't you have a book out? WHY?
772. Sarah said:
My OB also told me that Prozac was a pregnancy safe drug. Enjoy the unwanted advice and criticism!
And twins aren't THAT bad. ;) I bet you could do it. :)
773. Lisa said:
Good for you, Heather! I am really happy for you!
774. PB Rippey said:
So odd how your detractors take the time to criticize you instead of just moving on to other sites, or focusing on their own sites, as if they have to have some control over the content here--which of course they don't have and can never have. Hello? But like you say--more traffic for you and hopefully more fans.
775. rebecca said:
you don't seem to be doing very well.
you are a wonderful mother, and don't ever forget that!
ps: names?
776. Cathy said:
continued good wishes for getting through the morning sickness. can't wait for more updates.
777. Anonymous said:
you look beautiful :)
778. MereMortal said:
#740 - Yeah, I was going to comment on eating the placenta - with a show of support.
Here is more info on Placentophagy http://www.vivantemidwifery.com/placenta.html.
Some people encapsulate it, others eat it cooked, others raw.
I've personally had friends and clients that have done it and have sworn by it's benefits.
Sweet bump, dooce.
Leigh
779. Anonymous said:
I was and am and had been on effexor before I got pregnant, and during. And I had a healthy baby girl who has grown up into a delightful, loving, charming, ridiculously intelligent four year old. And when I was 7 months pregnant, my husband left me for another woman so I sure as hell was glad I was on that pill. I know what kind of person i am off of that medicine and I do not want my daughter to ever know that girl, if you know what I mean.
780. robinv said:
well said!!
you rock, as usual!
781. Smacks said:
Someone's a little hormonal! Before you cyberslap me though, you should know that I know exactly what it's like. I've been pregnant THREE times, so I know you have good reason to be a little "skritchy". (Hmmm... I wonder if your growing a little Right-winged Republican??) But still... now I understand why some of your blog posts have been such a downer for the past 10 weeks or so. I thought it was just due to the election. Super cute baby bump though! You look gorgeous. Congratulations.
782. Anonymous said:
Hi Heather,
Uhm, I hate to tell you this but there could be a sneaky twin hiding behind the other. It's happened before! Chances are, however, that you're just having a nice, chubby healthy little baby. Will keep my fingers crossed.
Best regards,
Byron's Mom
783. Julia said:
I take Prozac and always will. just try to get it away from me. Your child will be fine. good lord, my mother had a WHOLE pizza and a SLOW GIN FIZZ an hour before she delivered me and I graduated college and had a good job before I retired to raise the next generation of chemically enhanced children in our family.
784. Amanda said:
Heather,
You are truly an inspiration to me....I have read so many of your posts that describe me and my feelings to a "T", especially ones about Post-Partum. I have put off having another child mostly out of fear of feeling how I did after my first (and only) child. I wish you nothing but the best and hopefully, reading about your new pregnancy and child will push me over the hump to have another....My husband would lick your feet if you can convince me!!
Damn the naysayers!!...This is YOUR child, YOUR body and YOUR choice. A happy mom makes a happy baby.
Best wishes to you and your family! And keep these posts coming.
Amanda
785. K said:
you go, girl :)
congrats and love the bump!
786. Kathy said:
Don't you dare feel bad about thinking twins are a nightmare. I'm on my first (and hopefully only) pregnancy and it's with twins. I'm three days over due and let me tell ya, the havoc it wreaks on your body/health/finances/sanity . . . you have every right to enjoy being pregnant with one.
Enjoy it and keep on with my favorite blog!
787. Lydia said:
You look so serene in the current picture...or exhausted from puking for days on end.
788. thebenevolentdictator said:
Don't let the haters win!
For all those people that think that you "shouldn't be allowed to have another baby"...well, perhaps they shouldn't be allowed to post crap on the internet.
One irrational suggestion deserves another.
789. Karen MEG said:
Your bump is cute, the 2nd usually sticks out waaaay earlier. I was busting out all over the place at 6 weeks with #2.
Congrats on your pregnancy. And good on you for posting this for others who may need to read this. Depression is a condition that should be controlled, and you've discussed the risks with your doctor and made the decision that's best for you and your baby. End of story.
I also breathed a sigh of relief when we were assured there was only one. The thought of twins, which was a distinct possibility, was cute for all of 2 seconds.
790. Lesley said:
Congratulations!!
Trust me, you are right in not wanting twins!! I LOVE mine to death, but OMG some days I would give them away (kinda j/k). And my 12 week bump wasn't a bump, more of the 20 week variety.
791. Dawnie said:
Congrats to you Heather! Longtime lurker...
I was just wondering about this very subject the other day, and I am glad you have fully researched and made the right decision for you. I stayed on my meds with my 2nd (and last, sadly)pregnancy as well, and everything turned out fine. That boy is now 9 and the smartest in his 3rd grade class. Only you, Jon and your doc know what's the best for you. Don't let anyone else get you down!
Merriest of Christmases! ~DRS
792. Stephanie said:
Wow, your 15-week bump with Leta is so small! I'm pregnant with my first baby, and at 15 weeks, 4 days today, and literally, throughout the day I've gotten bigger in that one area! It's bizarre.
Congrats again on your second! I think you are most than capable of making your own decisions. I know it's not the same, but people tell me I'm crazy for continuing to ride my bike while I'm pregnant!
793. rb said:
p.s. if that's a 12 week bump, I'm about 30 weeks and my husband is 50 weeks. Should we be worried?
794. Anonymous said:
For the record, Leta is so beautiful. You are not so bad yourself.
795. Dawn said:
I am a traditional, conservative, pro-life Catholic and cannot tell you how much enjoyment I get from reading your website. See, not all of us religiously pious are total asses. Anyway, I can accept that we disagree about many things, but that doesn't mean that I cannot appreciate you and your views. And many times, I agree with you. Scary, huh? Twins? No way! Meds? If you can't take care of yourself, how on earth are you suposed to be able to take care of anyone else. The only thing that seems to sum up my feelings at this point is, "You go girl!".
796. Beth said:
Oh good, comments still open. I'm so glad you're not being browbeaten into quitting your meds. I kept my Wellbutrin and everything is fine, thank you, inculding the fact that I did not kill myself or my baby.
797. KSD said:
Okay, couple of things...
"A woman's uterus is like a pair of pantyhose; once worn, the shape is remembered"...doesn't make you feel any better, but it is kinda true...
Good on ya sistah...I have the twins...flippin' nightmare pregnancy, exhausting first 6 months and it gets tons better, but it's a LOT of hard work...
Fahq'em all...
:)
798. emily said:
I had a healthy, perfect baby girl on 11/24. I tried to quit lexapro when I first got pregnant, but I felt horrible. With my OB's support, I ended up deciding to take it through the whole pregnancy and I'm really happy I did. My mood was great and the post-partum stuff (all 9 days so far) has been fine. I'm a doctor as well, not OB. I have a couple of other physician friends who have had babies on SSRI (like prozac) and they all had healthy, perfect babies. Not a scientific study, but some anecdotal evidence.
799. Agi said:
Heather,
Slightly off topic, but has it hit you yet that you soon going to have to write two monthly newsletters?! One of the things that stopped our family at two daughters was the thought that I would have to do more of the annual retrospective videos that I make for each of my girls for their birthdays. ;-)
Congratulations!
Agi
800. Kathy from NJ said:
I was born in 1948 when women drank, smoked and took all sorts of (legal) drugs while pregnant. When a woman went into labor she was knocked out with ether or whatever. Mother & baby were well drugged. I was born in the elevator on the way to the delivery room and my mother always told me that I was the pinkest baby in the nursery, all the nurses remarked on my beautiful color (no ether). Although my mother smoked I came out at 8 lbs 15-1/2 oz (low birth weight from smoking?). I guess the biggest difference between then & now is the number or lawyers.
801. liz said:
thank you for addressing this issue so honestly. i struggled with PPD after the birth of my daughter 15 months ago and went back on zoloft. i will absolutely stay on medication if i ever decide to get pregnant again. my doctor agrees that the benefits far outweigh the risks.
802. Alicia said:
There are always going to be people who think they know better about your health and your pregnancy than you do. I hate those people. Physiology aside, I genuinely believe that if you want to have a healthy baby, you need to healthy yourself, and that includes mentally. So, to hell with those people. May they go bury their respective placentas under a tree and leave the rest of us alone.
I'm about a month ahead of you in my second pregnancy and we could be twins in terms of figures, and my experience has been exactly the same. It was like the second I peed on the stick I stood up and there was a bump. With my first I was almost 30 weeks before my bellybutton popped out and my still-moderately-cute outie was gone by 16 weeks this time around. Maternity pants by 12 weeks. What strange planet is this that the exact same event is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT the second time around? That said, it's kind of fun. I like the proof.
Anyway, I'm so thrilled for you and so sorry I made this entire comment about me. I am looking forward to seeing if our situations stay similar. Grats!
803. karen said:
You should also tell everyone about the vast majority of people who support your crrrrrazy life decisions. Or you know, all the emails talking about how you're perfectly suitable masturbation material.
Or was that just me...
In any case, your lumps, your lumps, your lovely lady lumps are just super, even soaked in Prozac.
804. Anonymous said:
Not reading 800+ comments, just wanted to add my 2 cents. I had bad PPD after my first, went off my meds at the beginning of second pregnancy ( 6 years later) and had major problems; went back on the meds but it took awhile to stabilize.
Definitely stay on the meds. Baby was ok. Breastfed on the meds too. Valium probably not a good idea, I think that class of drugs causes birth defects, SSRIs were ok.
Best of luck!
805. Tamara said:
I usually never comment, but I'm so thrilled for you that every time I read your blog now I tear up a bit. My babies (kindergartners now) are adopted, and I'm a huge advocate of that method of having a family, but I envy your opportunity to raise another "homegrown" baby. Congrats, doll! :-)
806. Alyse said:
Thank you for talking about your choice to take your medication during pregnancy. Those of us who struggle with depression and medication thank you.
And congratulations to you, Jon, and Leta!
807. Anna said:
Your bump is beautiful! Two things- I'm a psychiatrist... Prozac is the safest anti-depressant you can be on in pregnancy. You're absolutely right in staying on it given your history. You have to weigh the risks and benefits and you have... right on! And my second point is about the twin thing- I have 8 month old twins and survived (yes, I almost lost it a couple times in those early months!) and I'm sure you'd be a great mom of twins. Congrats on your little bean!
808. Amy said:
Heather,
You are so loved! I want to create a widget for your computer, phone and mailbox that converts all "hate" type correspondences into the sentence: You are loved!
You are a great role model in so many ways. You are a loving wife. You are a loving mother. You are beautiful. You are funny. You are smart. You are human and you let people see this bravely. You are an absolute inspiration.
The best part for me is knowing that this baby will be easy for you. I know you think it's going to be hard but not quite as hard, but I believe it will be almost a breeze for you and I'm excited to be able to see this happen.
I look forward to your books and future writing. You are awesome!!!
809. Jessica said:
Who cares about people criticizing you about Prozac. YOU COULD BE GROWING A PENIS INSIDE OF YOU RIGHT NOW. Or not, and that's okay, too.
810. Anonymous said:
I'm sorry...am I the only one who was totally weirded by the recommendation to EAT YOUR PLACENTA to ward off PPD? How exactly does one go about getting one's placenta? Do you have to eat the whole thing or just a bite? Can you cook it first? How do you get it home? Can they put it in a cute Chinese food take-out box or do you just bring your crock pot to the delivery? Salt, garlic, or both? SERIOUSLY?
811. jenn said:
Oh, I'm glad that you can stay on the med. I have trouble when I miss just a dose of Lexapro, I can't imagine dropping the med and wrestling with pregnancy hormones at the same time.
I know you tell yourself this all the time, but you are pretty damn amazing, woman.
Keep up the good work.
Oh, and more pics of Coco, please... ; D
812. pogonip said:
Regrettably, I have no advice to offer about medications and pregnancy--but I know it's a scientific fact that bumps with a big sister or brother grow 25% faster. (Okay, I just made that up, but I definitely was wearing maternity pants much earlier the second time around.)
813. Sarah said:
Heather, I am in SLC for the first time in about 10 years and I have thought I have seen you about 23 times now....lol. My goal for my 6 month visit is to run into you or Jon...lol. You are lovely and I wish you the best in your pregnancy. If (God forbid) you start to feel the same way you did after you had Leta then you have an advantage this time and know to get help and perhaps sooner this time. You will be fine. I am a mom of 4 and an Army wife whose husband is never home and I praise Jesus for Welbutrin everyday. My doctor refers to Prozac and Valium as a "deployment coctail" because our hubsters are gone for 15 months and so many of us need a little something to take the edge off the stress and depression that can accompany such a long separation and being so alone with our babies. If you see a slightly overweight woman with short blonde hair and four young children run up to you screaming "DOOCE!!!!!!!" that would be me, I also have a charming southern accent. :-D
814. Paula said:
Hi there Heather,
I applaud your decision to stay on Prozac and to be candid with your readers about it. I am a longtime SSRI user, a psychotherapist by trade, and have suffered from depression and anxiety for a long, long time.
First, Prozac has been extensively studied for use in pregnant women and since it's been around so long it's considered quite safe. It's the bastards at the FDA who won't actually STUDY much of the effects of these meds on fetuses. What I'm trying to say is that the reports on pregnant women are more anecdotal than deliberately studied and that's why the A, B, C, D ratings for these drugs to be used in pregnancy sounds scarier than it actually is.
I went off my meds completely when pregnant with my first child, and managed to stay off them until 6 mos. after having my second baby. I wish I'd stayed on my antidepressants the whole time. I was an hysterical, depressed mom. I wasn't honest with myself about cost-benefits ratio of staying on my meds; my husband, child, and even fetus would have been much better off had I been balanced and taking the SSRI's I had been on in the past.
My only advice for you is, after being a longtime reader and sharing a lot of your mental health issues - stay on the meds. Your baby is at much more at risk if you go off your meds. They're just starting to find out the effects of the stress hormone cortisol on the developing fetus and I'm in the camp that believes a little prozac exposure is better than chronic cortisol exposure on the developing fetal brain. (I'm by no means an expert, just a therapist and armchair neurology reader).
You might want to look into switching to zoloft after you have the baby, as if you're nursing zoloft is transferred into mother's milk at a much lower concentration than any of the other antidepressants. It's what I take and we're all a much happier family because of it.
Also, you might want to check out a Dr. Hale's book Medication and Mother's Milk if/when you get that far.
But as someone who's been there, I applaud you for absolutely doing the right thing. Bravo!
815. Anu said:
Hi Dooce,
Congrats on the pregnancy :-)
I'm sure you are making a very informed decision about being on Prozac. If someone doesn't like your choice, screw em!
816. Anonymous said:
I'll admit it --- I wondered about it. Thank you for sharing. You can't know how much your choice to share helps so many of us.
817. Mely1015 said:
I think that you look awesome!...Congrats in your baby bump, and if you want try the preggie pop hard candies they worked for me like a charm and my morning sickness were during the whole 8.5 months of the pregnancy!
818. Anonymous said:
So I have lurked here for months....just wanted to say congrats. I too as the bajillions of posters above, took prozac during my pregnancies. I hated being pregnant, suck at delivery and find the first few months of babyhood possibly the biggest afront to human survival. In addition, I drank an occasional glass of wine or beer during the first trimester and more than occasional glass during the last. (Hello, has anyone been to Europe?) Oh, and I am a doctor. A neonatologist. Get a grip people. I am glad so many of you are perfect, it will balance out my sucky genetics and lack of will power in my offspring.
819. Michelle said:
How exciting!
820. Queen of the Click said:
That's so rude that people would comment about your medical condition.
You look so cute - you are a healthy woman and will have a great baby!
Love you & Leta - Jon not so much.
821. Darrell said:
Great pictures of you and the baby.Eat healthy and listen to your doctor.
822. Amy said:
855 comments most of them good, you are a rock star!
823. Fraulein N said:
Disclaimer: I am not one of Those People, and I hardly ever comment because a) the comments are usually closed by the time I get here and b) what are the odds you're going to read my comment anyway? -- HOWEVER --
I actually have wondered about this very thing since you broke the news that you were pregnant. And not that hearing that you're still on Prozac is like the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval or anything, but it is kind of nice to hear that it IS an option. It's nice to know that staying on my meds while pregnant is an actual possibility, should I ever become pregnant. For certain I feel more comfortable about having that sort of talk with my doctor, and not quite so plagued by the fear that she might try to wrestle my meds away from me lest I give birth to some kind of mutant monster or crack baby. Stupid fear yes, but there you have it.
824. Amy said:
I've had bumps larger than that after eating a bagel. :) May I be as skinny as you when I dive into the progeny pool!
825. Kathleen said:
YOU ROCK. And those other people who may have a different opinion? They suck. So there.
Nice baby bump!
826. lewlew said:
Believe me when I say that I, too, lived with that nightmare of a possibility for 10 weeks the pregnancy after I DID IN FACT HAVE TWINS. No kidding, I waited that long to even go see the doctor because I had to convince myself it was twins again so I would be OK with it and not jump off a building. It wasn't though, and let me tell you how weird it was to only see one baby in there!
Congratulations to you and your family!
827. Anonymous said:
uhhh......I forget the number of the commenter but anti nausea meds like Bendectin have been shown to cause birth defects. (google Daubert+Bendectin) Recipes for anti nausea remedies made from over the counter drugs are not a good idea. if the box says don't take when pregnant don't take it unless you talk to your physician!
828. Abdr said:
Heather,
I'm a female follower of your blog, and am writing for the first time to register my opinion, which could be considered extremely neutral because I have never been pregnant nor used any medication like Prozac:
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE DARE TO CRITICIZE/GIVE ADVICE ABOUT SOMETHING THAT SHOULD BE EXCLUSIVELY BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR DOCTOR!
People with half a brain should be able to conclude from your blog that you are a smart and responsible mother and a person capable of doing research, talking to doctors and making an informed decision. Obviously you are doing what's best for the child, yourself and your family.
Congratulations, I wish you a very happy pregnancy.
829. Marti said:
You look absolutely lovely.
830. Taylee said:
I saw people reference to comment #188, so of course I had to go back and see what all the hee-hawing was about. KNEE SLAPPER I SAY, KNEE SLAPPER!
So since your taking your drugs, you should top it off with a spray-tanning session. I'm just saying.
Only a suggestion.
Ha.
I'm kidding, truly.
Your a beautiful Prego. And your totally prettier than your husband. BY FAR. :)
831. Jen said:
Prozac saved my life when I was going through post-partum depression, so I totally understand your decision to stay on it.
Anyone who questions it does not GET how horrible PPD is. When I think of that time of my life, I can't believe that person was me. Stay healthy, stay aware of yourself.
832. Cord Blood Expert said:
Never learned about Prozac and pregnancy. But it's true that unsolicited advice is extremely annoying when you have thoroughly researched your options and know what you're doing!
833. Kim said:
I am so f***ing happy for you! I know several women who have given birth to happy, healthy babies while continuing to take their antidepressant medications. Not taking them would have been a devasting time for all involved. Anyone who is critical of your decision is not familiar with your history and is medically uneducated. Closed-minded people suck!
834. Sarah said:
I want to congratulate you on recognizing your own issues and dealing with them like an adult, and not endangering yourself, husband, child, dogs, and more importantly your unborn child.
Its awesome to see that you know whats best for you to be able to handle things.
Forget all the people who call you a bad mother. What do they know? Nothing!
835. Meg said:
When reading this entry through the GoogleReader on my iPhone, I thought the sonogram picture said "Species : Intermountain or goat" instead of "Siemens" and "Intermountain OB GYN Spec."
Just because bad eyesight is HILARIOUS upon occasion.
And, you know it, but it bears repeating everyone : you're awesome.
836. Kris said:
Second, and subsequent babies almost always show earlier than first babies, because the insides have already been stretched out once. Me? I show almost from conception (which will NOT be happening again, my friend. Oh no. Not me! I make a LOUSY preggo).
837. Sharon said:
All I can say is been there done that. PPD with son number one 7 years ago. All hopped up and ready to go with son number two, 4 years ago. Jumped into the crocodile pond with what I thought was a suit of armour only to discover it was made out of a hardened mixture of sugar and water and probably a wee bit of mammal blood to make the crocs swoon at my presence. Until you've been through it, you just don't know how awful it can be. I wish you all the best with your pregnancy - prozac and all! I'm now a year off my anti-depressant and doing well.
838. Gretchen Kennedy said:
Awww, I think you're great, and I'm sure this baby will be just as great as Leta is! So here is what's creepy, right? I had this dream that I was all, "OMG I CAN'T HAVE A BABY," and then my husband was all, "OMG I MUST HAVE A BABY," and then he met you and you were all, "Yeah, I'll totally have your baby," and then I woke up? And you were pregnant? TOO MUCH DOOCE.
I love your honesty, I love your writing, you crack my shit up, you are totally awesome. Rock on with your bad self, momma!
839. Joy said:
YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL.
You look so happy, and that's the tiniest, cutest bump.
840. christine said:
i had pre-, peri-, and post-partum depression.
i had gone off my celexa several months before pregnancy thinking i was doing the best thing for everyone involved.
yeah... no.
the only thing it benefited was the wallets of one psychologist, 2 psychiatrists and the hospital whose psych ward i admitted myself to. so six weeks into my pregnancy i was back on my meds. i love my meds. me and my meds are BFF.
you heather, are doing the absolute right thing.
but you know that.
243656. Anonymous said:
@ #188
Wow. I really admire comments by people who can't spell and lack the ability to incorporate punctuation. If you're going to insult people, learn some basic grammar, fuckwad.
841. Catherine said:
YOU GO!
I love your attitude about your rights to be happy with your own decision.
I'm 27 weeks pregnant and haven't not enjoyed all the opinions that come at me from people I didn't ask.
I'm getting better at saying, um....You think you are saying that because you respect me and women in general but you are coming off like a fanatical christian with so much dogma that has NOTHING to do with me or my opinions or decisions.
Love that belly bump!
congratulations!!!!!!!!
842. M said:
"I'm perfectly capable of making decisions for me and my baby"
Fuck yeah! You are an inspiration to me. Keep it up!
843. Anonymous said:
I am that person! you are writing this for me. thank you.
844. bekah said:
so...I rarely comment, but I wanted to say...I am that person. I have been really questioning whether I would ever be able to have children, simply for the fact that I am afraid of the me sans medication. Can I cope without it? Probably. Do I want to chance feeling that despair again? Not really. Anyway...you have a lot of comments here, so you might not even read this, but if you do, just...
thanks.
845. Just me said:
I took Prozac during my pregnancy and had a beautiful healthy girl that got a 10 on her apgar.
I took the Prozac the whole time I breast fed her as well.
You keep on your Prozac and keep your sanity.
Enjoy your pregnancy and ice cream!
Just me
itsjustamething.blogspot.com
846. ritabby said:
DOOCE RULES! (You're bump looks bigger, because you're thinner.) Thanks for sharing.
847. caroline said:
you look effing beautiful! My official congrats to you. I have had two kids with Paxil and they are just fine. well from those drugs at least.
I am so happy that you are having another. My son is 2 months younger than Leta and I started reading you when our kids were just about 1 1/2. then I had another and my life got thrown in a blender.
your life is crazy with the dogs and all, but i've got all that too. you need more than one kid to catch up to my craziness and keep me laughing and not feeling jealous of the fact that you don't do diapers anymore. :-)
good luck! you are awesome.
848. Kathy said:
I have been following your blog for maybe half a year now and I didn't know that you were previously pregnant and had a miscarriage. My heart sank.
Glad you're pregnant now! When I read about the news, I cheered in my livingroom!
Congratulations~
849. Jeanette said:
you are fantastic. absolutely fantastic. congrats on the baby, your adorable family, the Web site, your sense of humor... happy holidays!
850. Krissa said:
Well said. (Envision pumping fist in the air.)
851. Tiffany said:
I'm a med student, and when I was on my OB rotation, the doctor I worked with put almost all of his pregnant patients on Prozac. He cited some obscure study that said that children born to moms on Prozac performed better than their drug-free gestation peers in kindergarten.
Oh, and also something about those patients not calling him at 3 am to cry anymore. (Not that I'm saying you shouldn't call your OB at 3 am to cry. Because, really, if you can't do that occasionally, what the hell are you paying for?)
852. Nikki said:
You've got crazy, hard-core guts. And I admire you and applaud your decision. When you give birth to a healthy baby with the correct number of hands, toes, feet, and fingers, then you can shove that cute infant face in theirs and say, "Told you so!"
853. Tiffany said:
And...I effing LOVE this masthead.
854. Heather said:
I hope you actually read this message. i wrote to you when our kids were just a few months old (when i started reading your blog) my name is heather, my husband's name is jon, no h. i used to be a web designer/developer. my son is 3 months older than your daughter. i lost my job due to a misdirected email much like your blog. anyway, i am writing again almost 5 years and 1 more child later. where you will soon be. tomorrow is my daugher's 1 year well-child appointment and i will FINALLY be mentioning my untreated post-partum depression. i HATE myself and my life and i avoided antidpressants due to fear of birth defects. the risk of birth defects is the least of my children's problems. i am a horrible mother. i suck at this and need that pharmacological help! i am miserable every day and i am ruining my children because of it. YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING TAKING THOSE MEDS. it will be a miracle if my kids reach adulthood in a totally unfucked way. i am you without meds and it isn't pretty.
855. Watty said:
omg. You ever sit in a daze and just out of nowhere go "Wait, WHAT???"
Congrats on the pregnancy! I had to go back to see where the announcement was after seeing your post on twitter. I was all "What the??" Seriously! I'm here often and missed it! Sorry
Hope the morning sickness goes away soon. And sorry to get off topic, but you look AMAZING on your momversation....I smiled at both your interview and talking about your 4 year old (first off didn't expect the accent, secondly, I have a 4 year old girl too...they're fun! Last week she told her brother to pick up his crap that's next to the bed! LOL)
So glad the 12 year old boy came before her, he never asked any questions really about how his sister got in there, both times I was pregnant.
Have a great upcoming weekend :)
856. Belle said:
Thank you for writing this. <3
857. Mama Anachronism said:
You look great! I have the same size bump and I'm only 8 weeks. This makes me nervous as twins run in my husband and I's family. I'm also on prozac with this pregnancy as I decided that I didn't need it while I was pregnant with my daughter and it was the most horrific 40 weeks.
858. naturline said:
Thanks for the feed.....I love your blog and you too..lol!!
859. Lynn said:
Your tummy still looks better than mine...and I'm not even pregnant! :D Hang in there, and don't listen to anyone trying to play doctor.
860. Ana said:
Congratulations Heather! Thank you for your honesty, it helps to know there are others out there!
861. Mother Liberpublican said:
Criminy, I can't believe how many comments you get about a nonexistent bump! I can't even get the turds in my family to read my blog about foster-adopting my daughter who is REAL. I must suck as a writer. Anwho, I took Prozac during my first pregnancy and the baby had a ginormous head. So keep on keepin' on, sistah. I love your 'tude, dude.
862. Natasha said:
I have that shirt in navy and blue. I also have the exact same hardwood floor.
I didn't show until 5-6 months with my first baby either. I avoided stretch marks all the way until the LAST TWO WEEKS of my FOURTH and LAST pregnancy. Still huffy about that.
And I wouldn't call that "showing". ;-)
863. Michelle Ross said:
Speaking from one mentally wacky mom to another, those people are stupid. I was on medication my whole pregnancy and my daughter is JUST fine, thank you.
864. Holly said:
Sigh. I don't like it when one person claims to speak for many.
I haven't read through all these comments so sorry if I am repeating what someone else has said, but 167's "European" experience is NOT typical here in the UK. I speak as someone who has seen the mental health system both as a patient and a social care/mental health worker. In fact, there has been widespread controversy over offering too much medication because it is cheaper than therapy, so in a sense, 167 has had an extremely well-funded breakdown.
It's a little ridiculous to suggest that sectioning someone would be seen as preferable to giving them medication, either from a mental health or budgetary point of view.
I have never been sectioned and the NHS has provided me with lots of psych meds, most of which were completely useless (it's just how I'm made, I don't respond to much) and also lots of therapy and psychiatric care. I am now pretty much as fully recovered as possible and very grateful that I was given the treatment I needed, but "free" health care has its own cost. There was a good bit of waiting around until services became available and lots of personnel changes throughout (I could have lived without telling total strangers my very intimate story of how I lost my shit over and over again, and it was only the consultant psychiatrist who could tweak my meds, so when he was working elsewhere for 6 months I was told to sit tight and keep taking something unsuitable). I was lucky in that I was not suicidal so I just tolerated it and it worked in the end.
Dooce, I really enjoy your blog. Good luck with your pregnancy. A fetus is a very robust and adaptable creature.