in connecticut, we say it "cran".

i'm so joining word time! it looks fun, and i have a new flip cam!

Pants are overrated - here, I've brought Johnny Walker Blue.

Great video! This sudden live Dooce exposure has been really fantastic. Do you think a once-a-week video post might be do able? Live Chuck tricks! A little more in-depth video Daily Style?

Would Madam desire more alcohol whilst pondering her answer?

Cray On.

Cray-on.

CRAYON!

But don't worry - John's clogs cancel out his correct pronunciation of the word so you're still even.

Pants-less households are the BEST! And I love various pronunciations of words, how boring would it be if we all sounded like Peter Jennings? So let's see...if I twist my lower lip a bit to the left, I too can get the correct pronunciation of "crayon."

Cran- Thats how I say it. I'd fall over dead if I had to call it crown.

Yup, I say cran too. Like cranberry. And I'm a Midwestern girl so everything comes out through my nose...especially Plaza. You guys sound much better saying it than I do. At my house we spend our free time beating each other with foam baseball bats and blow up boxing gloves. You're much more civilized with your fancy shoes and indoor toilets!

"c-yan the scorr you scorrred" I'm going to be saying that in my head for days now.

The only word in my vocabulary is Dooce!

CROWN!

Although.. I must say, I enjoy saying "toilet" .. I say "toh-lut" and "oil" i say "ohl" and the name "Kyle" .. "kuhl"

Actually, Heather, your southern accent doesn't show up in the individual words nearly as much as when your just conversing. It's a very nice accent.

Crown all the way.
But I was born across the river from Memphis - so I may not count.

It's totally CROWN!

P.S. Good to see your marriage is just like the rest of ours, lol!

You know, I am having the worst week and hearing you say "crown" just totally cheered me up. Out of all the people who say crayon the stupid way, you are my favourite.

Ha! You two are adorable. I didn't naturally expect that level of adorableness.

Hi Heather-
I just started reading/following your blog a few months ago. I'm a sahm and your blog has helped me get through some very difficult days. Besides my therapist and you, no other mom has ever really ever been completely honest about how the difficulties of raising children can drive the mom to the edge.

Thanks for being so honest about the experience. And thanks for not censoring your humor. Anyone who has a problem with what you're doing or saying, shouldn't come here. Simple as that.

Best wishes to you and your lovely family.

Holly
p.s. say crayon any way you'd like- tomato, toe-ma-toe,
cray-on, crown....

I have to agree with Jon on this one -- it's Cray - On. A crown is what you put on your head, you know like all the Princesses wear! If I take off my pants, it might sound more like Crown.

Hilarious! Heather, you are awesome and an inspiration!

One word
One way to say it
TWO SYLLABLES
CRAY - ON

So do you guys say mirr-or or meer?

As a fellow Heather, I feel bad betraying you, but...

...I'm with Jon on this one.

CRAY-on. Like RAY-on.

My mom's family does this over the word horrible. My grandmother was from New York and my grandfather is from Arkansas. So it's whore-eh-bull versus har-eh-bull. Good times!

Could you and Jon please say "MIRROR" ? I need to laugh (and cry) a little more today!

And why can't I find a link to your Today Show segment? Their website is totally lame.

Ahahahaha!!

You said this is what goes on in this household on a daily basis and Jon says, "This is longer than 90 seconds." Yeah, I totally get what goes on in your household every day. ADOPT ME PLEASE! I need a sister...

And I hope you cackle when reading comments that snarkily compare what it has been estimated you earn with what you post about. Just say'n.

The two of you made me giggle like a fool. Love it!

In Michigan, it's CRAN.

Too funny. I definitely say it cray-on, not crown, but that whole debate reflects stuff that goes on in my house too!

The lace-up shoe part of this was a riot, as well as the crayola crown segment.

I know kids are notorious for mis-pronouncing words until they get them right, and it's always sad once they say them the right way ... some of my favorites from my kids:

pellow instead of pillow
livy room instead of living room
'nomen for snowmen
goggie for doggie

Mommy I'm sitting in the livy room on a pellow watching the goggie play by the 'noman.

Anyways, this was a laugh, and since you didn't have comments open on our morning show bit, I would like to wonder aloud ... REALLY OUT LOUD!!!! ... how Kathy Lee Gifford can pretend to be shy and distrusting of the internet, and a "non-user" when it would certainly make sense that she have a little education and internet skill since her precious offspring (the Cod-ster and Cass-attack) will be exposed to the internet often, and she should in the least bit learn to refrain from cowering from it with the "oh no, pedophiles!!!! everywhere!!! and porn, oh my!!!" distain to at least enough saavy to know what her kids are exposed to (in reality) on the net, and to help with homework, etc ... since we all know she's primo sit-down and be with the kids mom of all time ... okay, I'm starting to make myself barf on that description so I must trail off now ...

You guys are SO adorable.

Having been a Dooce fan for awhile, I knew you pronounced crayon as crown. It never made any sense to me until now, when I realized you pronounced "crown" which has an "ow!" in the middle, as a 2 syllable word pronouned "crow-on". Awesome! You guys are the best.

For the record, I'm a Minnesota gal, where "boat" is pronounced "boot", and "crayon" is a 2 syllable word pronounced "cray-on"

It's definitely Cray-on.

But it's also definitely PLAHHH-ZAH.

Did you say Leta-er at the end??? OMG You guys are too cute!

I actually don't even understand how you could possibly get the pronunciation "crown" out of the word "crayon". But then, I'm from Philadelphia, where the word is CRAN.

I am a northeast Ohioan born and raised and I just took a poll in the office and we all say CRAN.

I agree with Jon: Cray. On.

Heather, you are hilarious - I have been reading your blog for a while now but this is my first time to comment. I am so happy for you and all the exposure you have been getting recently - although Kathy Lee can take her lack of knowledge about "computers" and SUCK IT!! (Nightline was great though!)

Love seeing photos of Coco in the daily Chuck too - my husband and I have a blue merle Australian Shepherd who we just love!! Such a smart breed. (Chuck rocks too!)

Keep up the awesome work!! :)

But, more importantly, how do you pronounce W-A-S-H ???
(Was it just me, or did Heather's accent get way more pronounced at the end?)

Heather, how would you pronounce crayfish?

It's cray-on in Toronto, too. But what do we know, we call our own city Terronno.

I love how you say toilet, btw :P

I call the shoes that lace up 'tennis shoes'. Which is probably stupid, because I don't even play tennis. Anyway, my daughter pronounces crayon as 'cray-round', because that's what thinking about the two syllables does to a human being. But me, I'm pretty convinced they're crowns, but I'm from Kentucky so my opinion might not count.

And then you thought of various ways in which to massacre each other.

Hey, I got my book today!

I love how Jon says (more than once) "This is way longer than 90 seconds." And he's right. It's cray-on.

HAHAHAHA! My step-daughter used to always say, "crown," and I got the biggest kick out of that! (I'm WAY Southern, by the way. She's not.) Up until now, I thought she was alone in that. Shoulda known better! ;)

Crown? Like, Wanna knock the fuckin' crown offa Kathie Lee's fluffy head? I wrote about *it* too...entitled something like "Hog tie KLG to Paula Deen and drag 'em both through the cold Spring Mud."

Pronounced Mud. Like Dud. Which you may color with a brown CRAY-ON. Dammit.

CRAYYYYYYYYYYYYONNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

Drink more, it'll sound better. Try it with clogs in your mouth, yeah, that'll do it.

My fiancee is from the greater Pittsburgh area. I am from Indiana. We have a constant battle over the word that is spelled "roof". He contends that the double O makes it sound like "ough" as in "through". I am correct in that the double O is pronounced in "roof" the same way it is in "book".

Then again, this is the same man who says "Thursday" as if it were spelled "Thursdee".

Clearly, I am right.

heather, how do you and jon say height? it's HI-TAH! HIGH-TA! HIIIGH-TAAAH! not heigth. sigh.

("way Jerusaleum" is my verification word)

You could just stop the fight and call them colors. Thats what we say.
"Can I see the colors?"

But they are pronouced cray ons!
Pronunciation[krey-on, -uhn]
check out dictionary.com to hear and see the truth!

Like any true and proper Southern girl... "crown" all the way.

My word for you is this one... SYRUP. This word has caused screaming and cussing matches between my southern mother and my northern father for years.

But I'm totally with you on caramel. It's "Carmel"!

I love how obviously self-conscious/shy you are to be filming yourself, contrasted with your ability to be totally confident to let it all hang out in your writing. It is endearing.

I'm originally from eastern Kentucky (which is surprisingly more rural than the rest of Kentucky).

there = thar
lace-up shoes = tennis shoes
crayon = cray-on

Finally I am vindicated. Born and raised in the Shenandoah Valley, never even thought about how I pronounced the word for waxed coloring instruments until one day in college I was loudly ridiculed for my royal, one syllable pronunciation.

I should never have doubted my southern man upbringing

Caramel-CARMEL!

Crayon, crayon, crayon.

CRAY ON!

Say it with me.....

CRAY ON!

I say Cray-on because that's the way my Mom taught me but we also say "wadged" which is apparently not even a word. I pronounce naked ne-kid but that's just 'cause it's fun to say.

that was hilarious!

us true southern girls say "crown." my favorite is wash, in kentucky we like to put an 'r' in there, "warsh your hands."

More Armstrong video content, please!

OMG I literally almost fell off my chair when you broke out the part about the FANCY SHOES!!!

I so wish that you guys would visit NYC more often - we had so much fun meeting you!

Also, I'm sorry, but as a born & raised AZ girl (motto: "the state with NO accent whatsoever"), I have to go with CRAY-on. But hey, I own Crocs, what do I know? :-)

How the passive aggressive deals with the great crayon debate:

Me (to my 3-year-old son): Here's a yellow crown to color your picture.

Husband: What? Is he coloring with a king's crown?

Me: No, it's a Crayola crown.

Husband: NO, it is a Crayola CRAY-on.

Me: Here, son, is a CRAY-on. Don't you like coloring with CRAY-ons? Can I get you some more CRAY-ons? Do you think Daddy would like a CRAY-on?

I wrote out a sentence with crayons in it and had someone read it. We both pronounced it "craons". Which looks quite odd. We don't say CRAY ONs we just sort of run it all together without the long A sound. And now i'm going to be saying craons all day THANKSSOMUCH

I will think of you when I eat my free Southern-style chicken sandwich at McDonald's tomorrow, Heather. And I will ask it if it wants a "crown." Cause I can speak its language, thanks to you.

Heather, I totally have a girl-crush for you but I have to side with Jon on this one.

You two are awesome and look at it this way Leta is young and she can pronounce her words any way she wants and what the hell--so can you :)

Watched Nightline last night - great segment!!! Oh yeah, and this video is hilarious and you can say Crayon however you want :)

Yea, yea, yea - what went down with Good Morning America??

Hey, I'm from Memphis too, but I say cray-on. There's a Y in there people!! Then again people always tell me I sound like I'm from the Midwest, even though I've never been there. When I was growing up my mom just called them "colors" haha.

Why does it matter how you pronounce "crayon" when they are called colors!? LOL! My husband calls them "cray-ons" and I call them colors. Our children call them "crans"

PS...My brain might explode if I don't get to read your synopsis of the Today Show experience SOON. No rush. And I stayed up an hour past my bedtime last night to see you on nightline. Feel the love.

for the next video could you please pronounce the following in the manner you see fit:

Ketchup or Catsup
Pretzel or Prenzel
Pittsburgh or Picksburgh

I live in western PA and we eat Heinz Ketchup but not on our Prenzels while we watch the Picksburgh Stillers!

And I agree with Jon, CRAY-ON!

SO worth the angry look from IT for using up ALLLLLLLL the bandwith the company can afford :)

Going to have to watch this at home since my dinosaur computer doesn't have sound. But for the record, it's cray-ahn.

I'm with Jon. It's CRAY-ON. I loved the video. Thanks for a great afternoon laugh.

I'm waiting {patiently} for your post on the Today Show. If they can't get a Hi-Def TV in their green room (Thank you, Jon), I am not surprised they had you interviewed by someone that can't turn a computer on.
They totally fu-bared that one.

LC: dont forget Khakis: those things yah staht youah cah with!

I say "cran". I have never heard it called a "crown" anywhere but here.

I'm glad to know that other couples argue over things of such life-changing importance. It makes me feel less alone. I'm still, after 5 years, trying to teach my husband the difference between seams/seems and rite/right. Want to beat head into wall.

Everyone around me (in Atlanta) adds extra syllables to every word so I'm surprised that you (from TN) chose go to the brevity route with "crown." See? You CAN take the country out of the girl. My in-laws would say craa-yawn. With a break in the middle to pick their teeth and eat some boiled peanuts. Which they would pronounce "bowlt" peanuts.

I say CRAN. I know it's wrong, but I just can't help it! My mother-in-law (who is English) had the hardest time figuring out what I was saying! She's like, 'CRAN?' Yeah, you know, CRANS, to color with! 'Oh, you mean CRAY-ONS!' Yeah, whatever, CRANS. That's what I said. LOL!

Can I just say I am disturbed by the entry of a third contender - "cran" - and of the huge numbers of people who say it this way. I pronounce it cray-on.

I say it like "cran" which is probably not the right way either. You are the only person I've ever heard pronounce it like crown though. My ex came from TN and I'm pretty sure I never heard him say crown when referring to a crayon. Of course, I don't think we ever had a hankering to color either.

I'm curious if you also add an 'r' to anything with 'ash' in it. Like, when you wash your hands do you warsh them?

I grew up on the panhandle of Florida with parents who grew up in Tennessee. I used to say "crown". I forced myself to learn to say "cray-on". I am the only person in my family who says "cray-on".

I definitely say it CRAY-ON, but that is because I am from Utah. Since moving to Georgia I have figured out that the south has it's very own language, even from state to state within the south. My two favorites Georgia Speak ones are:

"MASH the button to roll down the window" - OK, why so violent? All you have to do is PRESS it.

"If you are done with that you can CHUNK it in the garbage." Out west we don't CHUNK it, we CHUCK (as in your dog) it in the garbage.

BTW - love you with the southern accent best! So zexy! :)

Heather I think your fabulous but I have to agree with Jon on this one.
I'm from Michigan and have always pronounced it Cray-on.
I actually didn't know there was a dispute about the pronunciation until I read about it on your blog.
We also have Pop here instead of Coke or Soda.
Sneakers and tennis shoes.

The mispronunciation my husband says that drives me nuts is Ruff instead of roof.
So I totally understand your pain.

This was great! I loved seeing you two in action, please post videos more often.

And it's totally CRAY-on. I mean really.

Although I was sort of taken aback at how distinctly you pronounced your R's... I'm from NY (Long Island to be exact) where there is an "aw" and an "uh" in just about every word. Since you just returned from your trip to the city I can only assume you know whut I'm tawkin about.

Hey, I saw you on the Today Show, I think I TIVO’d it. Wuddup with Kathie Lee? She came off as a jealous snotty little frump. She said, “Oh, I don’t use computers because I’m dumber than a bowl of SPAM. But, I’m willing to learn.” Jeez.

Crayyun. Everybody knows tha-at.

Great video, very funny. But really hilarious when Heather doesn't know why they put particular words on the list - and then proceeds to say them in a hilarious way!

'round here in sunny central Florida, it's CRAY-on.

But, "there" is pronounced "thar".

I don't care about crayon or crown but comments are open and I just wanted to say that Kathie Lee Gifford is a complete nincompoop (for your Dad I didn't say shithead) and that you looked adorable on tv.

no. no. no. it's CRAN.

hah... well where we come from, it is "CRAY-on". But Texas doesn't count half the time when it comes to pronunciation.

I was born and raised in Ohio, and call it "cran", too. I have heard people pronounce it "cray-on" (which always sounds a little fancy to me), but never "crown". Although I lived in the south (Charleston SC and Atlanta) for several years and am no longer surprised at how the southern accent can turn words into something entirely different and make them somehow better.

Also, I loved the Nightline segment... you were shakin your groove thing on national TV. Right on!!!

This video made me smile very much ^_^ and made my partner ask from the living room "WHAT are you watching?!"

Much love!

Your biggest fan in Canada <3

I went to www.dictionary.com, where you can play the proper pronunciation of words. The dictionary site people say
"cray-on." Jon is right. Heather is wrong, with her "crown" pronunciation and I, originally from Detroit and now from Chicago, am also wrong in my pronunciation: "cran."

Brillian video!

One time my daughter's teacher told the class draw a crown. She raised her hand and asked the teacher "What kind of crown? The kind a queen wears or the kind you color with?"

Who says cray-on????

Awesome. Just awesome. But its cra-yon. You can pronounce it any way that you want as long as you post about it for my entertainment

Cray. On. Like crayfish. But not like crawdaddy.
What about words that end in -ture? I grew up with people who said it "furnit-yoor" and "temper-tyoor".

And my band director, since we played wrong notes that ticked him off a lot, said "ru-een" (ruin) quite often. "That ru-eens the chord!"

How do people say "because" in different regions? "Bee-cuz"? "Be-cawse" (with a soft "s" that does NOT slide into a "z" sound)?

Whenever I'm with my friends from Jacksonville, Florida, I'll slip into a slat Suthern acksint. It's so crazy, y'all.

I'm fixin' to head back to work. This was fun!

Man, listening to you makes me miss Georgia!! And humping my relatives.

LOVING that you're Wii-ing!

Huntsville, AL (formerly of Knoxville, TN) chiming in to say, "Crown."

Also - people tend to freak out when I call shopping carts "Buggies" - is that just me or do you get that too?

Karla Lang, ask any linguist; there is no "proper pronunciation," just different dialects.

Also, I lived in Oklahoma in my early years where I learned to saw "crown" for crayon.

Heather, how do you pronounce eczema? Most people say
Ex-ze-ma but my family says, "ex-zeeee-ma."

If the word wasn't spelled with two syllables, I'd, like, totally pronounce it like that!

Hi Heather

This being my first comment on Dooce.com, let me just say I find your honesty overwhelmingly FABULOUS! I guess this is the first time I felt I'm reading something on the Net written by a real human. That's the reason I hardly find it uncomfortable to be the only guy (looks like it) commenting here as of now :)

Stumbled upon Dooce.com in an Indian financial newspaper and have added you to my list of most regularly visited sites since then. You find a special mention on my own blog:
http://theperfectlifeinanimperfectworld.blogspot.com/2008/04/private-lif...

Anyway, I too was a bit surprised to find Darjeeling here. It's a mountain getaway town in India - a very popular tourist destination and the tea (mentioned in an earlier comment) owes its origin to this place too.

Keep up the great work. Wishing you and your family (esp. lil' Leta) all the joy in the world!

Duuude it's cray-on! I have these types of conversations in work all the time, as a writer I am obsessed with pronunciation.
Scone, Borough, Southwark..all words pronounced incorrectly where I live and it drives me crazy.
This video is so hilarious. Absolutely looooving the Southern accent.
P.s Darjeeling is a type of tea, my favourite type of tea.

Ya'll (you-all) are precious.

Crayon = cran.

Oregon = or-gon

you all = y'all.

One day, the South shall rise again and then won't all the Yankee scallywags feel so, so silly. (And I can totally say that, because I am part southern peach/part northern carpetbagger.)

My Captcha input was "gambling naples." I'm really sad it wasn't "gambling nipples." In the South, we'd say that: gaymbleeng neeples, by the way.

Seriously. That's some good comedy, thair.

You didn't see The Darjeeling Limited?! The movie that forced us Wes Anderson fans to walk around with our tongues hanging out of our mouths for months, because HOW THE HELL DO YOU SAY THAT WORD?

I say crown. It's so much crayonier, don't you think? Sounds like the inside lid of the box with all those colored dots on it.

You two crack me up. You are cordially invited to come visit our house and we will take you guys and Leta up to the Crayola Factory in Easton and have them settle the great crayon dispute. ;-) I also noticed from the NBC piece that Heather pronounces 'own' with two syllables instead of one. Maybe that's the origin of the dastardly mispronunciation?? Sorry, I'm with Jon on this one!

I'm from Alabama and I say crayon like crayun...but as one syllable. If that makes any sense. LOL.

Chester Draws.

Ignert.

That's all I have to say about where I grew up.

Okay, between this video and the Nightline segment, I totally need you guys to adopt me. *nods*

And sorry Heather, but it's definitely cray-on. And car-a-mel. But I am staunchly against clogs! So hopefully that counts for something...

(My verification phrase is "stores helpful". I agree!)

It's cray-on.

And does no one else call lace-up shoes runners?

But I'm from Vancouver (the Canadian one) where soda is called pop... so I guess I really don't count.

You and Jon are just like my parents. For real.

Also, thanks to your blog, I've started to write in ALL CAPS for things that are VERY IMPORTANT. My friends and family have no idea where this habit came from.

Heather, you could pass for being from North Carolina, too. Although I say "cray-on" with two syllables. My girls sound like country hicks because I sound like a country hick. But who cares?!

Great video!

Yesss! My favorite comment so far is #36 Lara said: "Um, did you know your pictures in the background are hung incorrectly?"

I love that I am not the only one who saw that and wanted to say something really, really bad! :) I'm guessing, Heather, that you do know and you purposely hung the pictures wrong. Am I right? Please, say I'm right.

Oh and by the way love the accent. I couldn't live knowing you sound like a New Yorker :) Ha!

Best. Blog post. EVER.

I'm a Michigander - and I'm all about crans.

I'll have to go with cray-on for this one.

If ALMONDS isn't already on this list, it should be.

A. ah-munds
B. all-munds
C. al-munds

or, if your from Northern California,

D. AMMINS

enjoyed tremendously!

especially the comment that it you had to say crayon correctly you would have to pause to think about the two syllables - i foraward this t om my mom who called me to laugh in my ear. I believe i have said those very words in reference to "one hundrend" which i pronounce "a hunerd"
born and raise in TX and it shows.

* side comment : i am so sorry you have to endure the dribble of commenters who think they know how to correctly hang pictures or seem to think they "know what is worthy or the DOooce name."

seriously?!? are these people real.

i love your house and i enjoyed the video. I am off now to write on my own blog about the amount of sweat I have collected whle the AC is being repaired.