Good on ya. Nothing worse than a bad liar! :)

It's going to come in handy that Christmas where she calls out, "Mommy! Grandma gave me the new Ariel doll that Santa gave me. I don't want another one!"

My sister used to tell me that it's only lying if you get caught.

But I kind of like the successfully part better--it makes it seem like something sophisticated!

I too was shocked by how edamame heavy your grocery bill was. I was wondering if you were running a Japanese bar on the side, ha ha.

You just have to write a parenting book! It will be full skills I needed 30 years ago. It fun now watching my kids tell their kids to go back and flush!!

The first time I lied I was not sucessful; I told my mom Mr. Oser had given me the pretty purple marker and all was fine until Maria told Mr. Oser that I had taken his purple marker, then my mom was called and I was in trouble. STUPID MARIA!

Let's face it, the kid will have to lie one day, might as well do it right.

I like edamame and I was surprised because they remind me of string beans and I loath string beans.

Funny post. :)

Do you taunt concerned parents for sport? 'Cause if you do, that would make the whole experience even better for me.

Admit it people. How many of us had to Google Edamame before finishing the story? I'm number one.

In response to KMac...I caught the same vibe that she was knocking Heather when she said that. I was more than slightly annoyed.

So wait, did she go pee somewhere else maybe besides the toilet?

Maybe she's learning from Coco?

The blocks are in stock here http://www.prestostore.com/

I had never heard of edamame and thought it might be some cheese-related thing. So I googled it. Oh my, it's soya?! I tried to eat soya beans once. Once was more than enough. I think I'd prefer the cheese. Lying is an art and needs to be learned properly, from a good teacher at a young age. I think she'll be fine!

what is truth really? just a perceived reality... it is a talent to convince others of a different reality ;)

this post was nice and clever. i chuckled the whole way through.

happy sunny days.

My favorite thing about children is when they lie for no reason. It seemed kind of out of nowhere but maybe why Leta chose to fib about going to the bathroom isn't immediately apparent to me...??

I was busy eating Marshmallows and had to look up what the heck edamame is. Shame on you for feeding your child such crap as that! Tell Leta not to blink and to flush the toliet when she says she went. For good measure she will need to wash her hands also so they smell like soap, that is what my son does anyway. Clothes are so over rated.

You should add some guilt in next time. Nothing makes a lier feel worse than added guilt.

"It's not a lie, if you believe it".

G. Castanza

Tim- you googled Edamame? It's one of the essential food groups.

My older sister always needed me to come in and keep her company when she was on the toilet (luckily she has a husband to do this now). I was in the bathroom with her so often that we created a memory game to pass the time. We'd take all the various bathroom items - brush, comb, toothpaste, etc until we had at least ten or so and then arrange them all on the carpet. Then we'd take turns closing our eyes and when we opened them, the other one of us would've hidden one of the items and we had to figure out which one. Its one of those fond memories that somehow never finds it's way into conversations....until now.

I'm the worst liar in the world - hopefully the new and rising generation will be better at it. Thanks for another entertaining post.

Pfft, my parents used to HELP ME lie. In kindergarten, everyone was losing their teeth except me, so I lied to the teacher and said I had lost one, pointing vaguely to my molars. Of course you don't lose molars that young, but she let it go, and later that day wrote my name on the Monthly Tooth with everyone else. Days later, my mom brought me in early to class before anyone else was there and saw the sign with my name on it. I burst into guilty tears and freaked out because what if Mrs. Z found out?! So before anyone could come in, she erased my name and gave me a look like, "None's the wiser."

Erasing your tracks, people. That's the key to success.

Lying is a marketable skill. You should be able to add it to your resume under "other skills and/or hobbies" with a short list of your best performances. If she practices real hard, she could grow up to be President.

Screw lying...I prefer telling the truth in the most disturbing way possible. WAY more fun without the pesky moral dilemma.

My sanity-saver when my kids were Leta's age was a fabulous book called "The Mothers' Almanac."

They said (I'm paraphrasing here): All 4-year-olds lie. They have to.

It apparently has something to do with a developmental stage realizing that language doesn't equal truth. Learning that words can come out of their mouths that aren't necessarily describing reality is a heady thing for someone that young. And they enjoy repeating the experience, so enjoy the ride!

Anyway, rest assured that Leta isn't on the fast-track to becoming a felon or anything.

Love edamame, love Dooce, love realistic parenting. You Rock!

I bet Leta just wants to save water since she's a hippie kid and she knows all too well that her mother scoffs at organic chicken stock!

;p

I would have bought all the edamame they'd let me truck out of the store. Yummy in my tummy!

Leta is well on her way to a career as a politician or oil company executive if she can master the art of successful lying. Lucrative careers...perhaps you should foster this behavior.

You and Jon take terrific photos. You're enjoyable to read too. People lie because they don't want to get in trouble. Reward Leta for telling the truth(even if she broke something,etc) & I bet she'll stick with it. (all kids lie at some point, its normal)

Heather I think you need to do a post just about edamame. I googled the word and Google gave me a weird error thinking that my query was coming from a virus or something. My guess is that this post by you has generated lots of hits on Google looking to see what it is. I knew that it was something Japanese, but after reading about it, it still doesn't sound appealing. But maybe I'll have to give them a try. Don't they sell them dried too as a snack food?

For the person asking about preparing edamame-

They can be boiled, but you have to take them out of the pods to eat them. The pods are inedible.

You can also thaw them, pop them out of the pods (this takes forever) and roast them like pumpkin seeds (for about 15 minutes, then push them around and cook about 15 more minutes or until they start to get brown on the underside, put some salt/spices on 'em, and eat!)

I laughed at the title of this post because I just got done emailing a friend saying, "They are doing a story on Dooce on the local Fox affiliate tomorrow night."

Any reason not to wear pants is a well founded means to an end. Leta Rocks!

@ Carrie in comment #25 The first time I ever had sushi was as part of a health food platter in a new age sort of restaurant. Sushi was new to me and I thought that the mushy green stuff next to it was guacamole. Having never heard of WASABI I downed a whole forkful... I think my date might have laughed... maybe?

Dooce, your posts are always great! Love the writing, the photography, Chuck and Coco and your style!

You rock. This post had me cracking up. I'm trying to teach my son to blame his father for everything, but this is another valuable lesson!

Hmm. Lying is bad. So is BAD lying worse? If you lie badly, isn't the net effect that you told the truth, even though your intent was to lie? Of course, this means you would be perceived as a liar, even though you couldn't lie to save your life.

On the other hand, if you lie well, you will never been seen as a liar. And isn't perception what it's all about? A lie you get away with looks just like honesty, so what's the problem?

At about this point, if you were a robot on Star Trek, your head would blow up.

I am taking you so seriously.

1. mmmm, delicious edamame.
2. there was an interesting article about kids lying in a magazine recently. Apparently it's something of a developmental milestone. Who knew? http://nymag.com/news/features/43893/

She'll grow up to be a very successful politician. She could be president!
Waiting for the obligatory 'bad mother' comment......
nope...
Damn, I was holding the 'That title belongs to Shaft' rebuttal.

What qualities are needed to classify a food noble? I mean, I can see why sauerkraut wouldn't be...but the one time I had edamame I was too freaked out by the fuzziness. Wouldn't fuzziness be a non-noble quality? Is it supposed to be fuzzy or did I get bad edamame? I did get sick later, but I just assumed it was all the booze.

Edamame is pretty much the best thing you can eat. Full of protein AND fiber and low fat. Plus it fills you up. Food of the gods, really.

So, apparently good writers make the best liars, right? Since Leta has your Brilliant storytelling genes I'm sure some pretty creative and believable lies will eventually develop.

<3, enjolie

For some reason, I thought you were going to lead up to the amount of Edamame Lita has eaten made her poop strange and she wanted to show you... thus not flushing! Sheesh, thought I knew the ending.

I had a fit last week when I went to Trader Joe's and they were out of the shelled edemame. Since husband is a vegiphobe and edemame is one of four vegetables I can get him to eat I had a little silent freak out right there in the frozen food aisle because it has been decreed that pod-on edemame is just too labor intensive. This from a man who is a triathlete. Anywho, learning to lie properly is a life impertive. Anyone who says they don't lie is a liar.

Frozen edamame? You just put it in a colander and run it under warm water until it dethaws. Dry it off and eat it.

Also, teaching real life lessons like this, I think, are the best argument for having kids. I love it.

I hope to teach my children how to riot in the streets without getting tear gassed. Life lessons. Real life lessons.

Lying successfully is a huge part of survival in the real world. On the other hand, you don't want her to get too good at lying to *you*, or your life is going to suck quickly.

I'm hoping, by the way, that the part that was the lie was *not* the part about using toilet. She didn't, er, go someplace else, did she? Because that's *definitely* behavior you don't want to encourage. She could be hanging out with Coco too much.

Is it wrong that I said a little prayer to the powers that be BEGGING for comments to be open so I could see all the impending stupidity?

Thank you powers that be. My day is MADE.

I think we all teach our kids to lie on some level, don't we? All parents have a BAD side--it gives us added entertainment value. :)

I also don't know what edamame is, but I'm too busy to google it.

Oddly enough, I have time to comment here.

I figured you bought so much edamame because it was on sale! 3 for 5 dollars! I was pretty impressed, you saved 40 cents and stocked up on edamame because it was a deal!

Knowing how to lie successfully is incredibly important! Knowing when to pull out the right one at the right time is a fine tuned skill once she reaches the right age. I still remember my first good lie. I had cut about and inch off of my braid and when my mom unbraided my hair that inch was really noticeable so I blamed the bad kid that sat behind me, of course my mom went into school and he was talked to and given detention for a month even though he denied it!

I second Samara's request. Could you please post how you prepare your edamame? I've always been intrigued by it, but never quite knew what to do with it. I'd love to give it a try.

I was just thinking more about this edammame habit you've got going...if you're trying to make the rest of us feel guilty about eating chip & salsa as a nighttime snack--IT'S WORKING!!!!

I hadn't realized that I should read the entire grocery receipt when something about antics ate the market are posted. I just look at the items as directed.

But clearly I am missing out on some real entertainment, so I'll get right on it.

I love how up in arms people are about your edamame purchasing. You eat that soy and you eat as much as you like.

Successful liar = career in politics.
Even trade off I would say.

My first thought after reading this email was what the hell is edamame? My second thought was, boy is she going to get some nasty hate mail after this post! Can't wait for those..

I can imagine those new readers gasping and clutching their hands together at the thought of teachingy our child the art of the well constructed lie.

I love edamame too. I can never manage to finish the whole bag though.

Heather-

You, Jon and Leta are an amazing family and the family you have on-line just blows my mind!
Love this post... Teach Leta to lie well and she may just grow up to be the greatest politician, lawyer... she may even become a great religious icon, at which point you'll be able to proudly say that she burst forth from YOUR loins!

To Emily(57)-

What if Evil Monkeys from Outer Space scattered Plutonium 236 all over the place, wouldn't you want to know it's half-life (which happens to be 2.8 yr) before you went to the grocery store to buy some more edamame?

I didn't see the 5 second clip on FOX 13. I can't comment?!?

I don't know that my mom directly taught us about the right way to lie but she did show my older sister the right way to toilet paper a house. I too am clueless about edamame. I like the suggestion of a post dedicated to just that. Pictures before preparation and after would also be helpful.

I wasn't much of a liar but I was a REAL tattle-tale! Oh. My. God. It was bad. If I got in trouble for something, I'd bring everyone down with me and then get mad at people who didn't get in trouble (because they weren't doing anything wrong!)

No one really told me it was wrong to do - Dont forget to give her the talk about that too!

I meant to drop you an email (although wouldn't have got a response likely as you are too popular :), but when I read yesterday's post, I was like, what the hell IS edamame (I even had to copy paste it here ..).. so glad you cleared up that you love it, now, off to google wtf it is?!

BTW .. at the end of your post today, I was thinking, huh, they told what?! Right on - she will be thanking you in highschool :):)

the Other Dawn (111): Those commercials rocked my world. The one with Alfonso Robiero as kid and the old man singing, "WHO BROKE MY WIN-DOOOOOOW?"

Brink back the LDS PSAs, ASAP.

Wow. There are people who not only don't eat edamame constantly but don't even know what they are.

I am such a Californian; the receipt didn't even make me blink.

I do have to wonder whether I'd teach my kid to lie better, or just keep letting her shoot herself in her own foot. I'd probably do the latter, but my husband will do the former ("If you don't wet your toothbrush, Mom will know you didn't really brush!") Guess we'll find out in couple of years when our baby is bigger...

Listen, if Leta is going to tell stories - she needs to use-what-her-Momma-gave-her and tell 'em right. So, I say, teach that gal how to tell the tale correctly. She's a dooce for pete's sake! She has a lineage to maintain! 'Nuff said!

Guess we interneters are all the same. I saw ALL that edamame and thought (in addition to: yum) why so much?

Glad someone else asked first. My to-do list is long enough. : ) And now we get to know why.

My grandfather used to say this:

"Never tell the truth where a good lie will fit."

I've been following that principle all my life and I turned out just fine, relatively speaking. No worries!

I had to look this up too, thank you wiki.

This made me laugh though:

"Young soybeans in the pod are known as maodoujia (Chinese: 毛豆荚; pinyin: máodòujiá; literally "hairy bean pod"). "

Hairy bean pod? Isn't that a scrotum?

oh heather, how i love thee.
i want to put you in my pocket.

Just another neophyte here too. But I didn't have to "google" edamame because you commenter's have answered the question. I think I will stick to microwave popcorn!

Thank you Shannon for the link....really good article. My Daughter is twenty one now and I have to pat myself on the back.....she and I had some whopper fights and yes...she didn't think anything of them even when I was an oozing, miserable puddle on the floor! To her it was "real communication".

Dooce......YOU ROCK

Ok, I was never an edamame fan until my boyfriend made hummus out of it... you may have discovered this already, but in the event that you haven't you HAVE to try this, it's really really yummy!

http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&...

My dad told me once he thought I was the best liar ever. Not because I was his daughter and not because I lie often, but because I was willing to deny anything and everything. The secret is to never give in...eventually you will induce enough resonable doubt. (i think this only works with parents though)

I am just relieved I'm not the only one who didn't know what edamame was.

I am proud of you Heather, for allowing licorice in your cart. You are displaying tremendous inner strength.

I wish I had parents like you.

Costco sells edamame in convenient, individual sized, microwave-able portions. Poke a little hole in the plastic cover, microwave 2 1/2-3 minutes, salt and enjoy. Mmmmm...yummy. I have one container every day at lunch!

Raising a stellar liar is just good economic sense. You'll avoid spending all that bothersome bail money. :)

1) Endamame is probably the most delicious thing ever.

2) A co-conspirator is also helpful in telling a successful lie. Then you both have alibis. Hopefully she'll realize this by junior high.

Leta is just giving you things for discussion on the blog. BTW, the photo of Coco yesterday (peed in the crate) was AMAZING.

Welcome new readers!

Please people, stop microwaving plastic!

Edamame Preparation:

Pour approximately 1 inch of water in medium pot.
Dump contents of one bag of frozen edamame pods into pot.
Adjust heat under pot to med-high.
Place lid on pot and let water steam/boil for about 5 minutes.
Carefully drain water from pot. Place pods in serving dish. Toss pods with a bit of salt and soy sauce.

To Eat:

Keep 2nd empty serving dish nearby for shells.
Place pod, lenghtwise, between teeth. Gently bite down and peas will pop out. Eat peas, discard shell.

I've decided that we don't have edamame (and I had to copy and paste that, since for some reason I cannot even seem to spell it) in Canada because, for the life of me I have NO idea what it is.
But since you seem to eat SO much of it, it MUST be good right??

At least teaching them to lie well is HONEST. When I catch myself telling my 5 yo son that I have eyes in the back of my head. I mean, come on, that's no innocent Santa deception people.

I have thought about entering myself into a "lying" contest. I can hands down lie about anything. And definitely have thought about the evidence to back it up. It is however sometimes a knee-jerk reaction, why did I lie, I didn't have to lie, but it was fun, why is it fun...yada yada yada. I can honestly say, I don't think I ever read a book or an article the way I read your blog. Word for word. You are an incredible writer.

Someone tell me what Edamama is and then I'll tell you if I am concerned about your consumption (um no)...but seriously, what the heck is it?

K.

You have to teach Lete how to lie so she has a chance as a politician. Don't break that dream of being President of the US for her.

I noticed the large amount of edamame, too. I have to say I thought it was a bit of a strange grocery receipt...edamame, chex mix, and licorice? Hmmm.

I am surprised by how many people don't know what edamame is. I suppose that there are a lot of regions in the US lacking Japanese cuisine?

my first comment on your hallowed blog! the edamame was noticeable, but i just figured you people are really healthy and at least you weren't buying chips. edamame is good eats, anyway.

and YES, being a good liar is how you live life well. lying is a skill used by anyone, just like picking a fight, knowing how to yell effectively, or how to put someone down. of course, people will tell you you shouldn't ever do these things, but living in a world of HUMANS sometimes it's necessary. why not do them well, when they're called for?

don't lie, unless you know what you're doing. aka, learn to lie successfully!

good on ya. just hope she uses her forces for good, not evil.

My parents always said that I was too good a liar and it scared them.

Now, I'd like to think that you and Jon were my parents in a former life and taught me well.

Love edamame. A little hard to find here in Western PA, but so delicious I savor it when I can get it. Also, what was it that Leta did that she felt she needed to lie? I'm very curious. Nasty people who don't get humor can blow it out their ______ (bum).

PLEASE, PLEASE, PPUHHLLLEEEEZZZ share your edemame recipe. I have no clue how to cook it........

How many times have I told the girls, "if you're going to sneak into the freezer and get yourself a bowl of ice cream without asking, at least have the good sense to put it away and wash the spoon so your mother and I don't know"

God, what a great story. You always come up with the goods, Heather. Thanks!

I teach middle school, and last week I had to teach my students how to misbehave when I'm not really paying attention to them. Step One: Don't misbehave and immediately look at me to see if I caught you. It's usually the looking that gets you busted. This is perhaps a skill to add to Leta's repertoire in the near future.

I saw your receipt and was immediately jealous at the sale price of that Edamame!! We love it here. Even my toddler loves it. Mmmmmmmmmm. Now, I need to convince my hubby that we need to have it tonight...again. :)

For those who don't know how to say it, it's:

ED-DUH-MAH-MAY.

At least, that's how we say it in Oklahoma!

Also, I steam mine, and then cover it in Lawry's Hot Salt. Gives it a little more kick than just sea salt.

I love your truthful and honest approach to parenting, she's going to fully prepared for this world!

This is a little over-the-top for me to admit, because I'm softly uptight and widely NOT OKAY with bodily functions...but I accidentally let one loose in my office. And, though short and not smelly at all, it was pretty damn loud. Since I've been back-tracking your entires [you are newly pregnant today, on my scale] and you're stuck in my head a little bit, my first thought was, "Wow. Heather would be proud. I'm progressing. I was only a LITTLE embarassed about that. ..but mostly I thought it was hilarious." And then I realized that I need to stop reading your blog.

BUT I CAN'T.

In danish, "Edamame" pretty much means "God damn[something]" or "F***ing [something]" :-)

A child her age who can lie has amazing intelligence. It takes a very sophisticated conceptual ability to lie.
Did you know only gifted children her age can lie.

Google that it's true!

Do not list "good liar" on her kindergarten application, even if it shows an advanced level of thought.

Any potty training tips? My 3 year, 3 month daughter is refusing. We've tried everything - sticker charts, cute undies, potty presents ... nothing is working. Any advice truly appreciated. (Also - my husband attended your session and met you at SXSW - I was so jealous I didn't get to go! He probably was one of the thousands of men at SXSW who met you and immediately said "my wife loves you!" And now he does too.)
Jen

I hear you on the edamame! The other day I discovered that the Uwajimaya in Seattle sells GIANT bags of it, and I made my boyfriend get one. He was skeptical that we could eat so much. I told him that we don't have to eat it all at once, but realistically? I could.

I think you are setting a horrible example for your child and all the children of the world, including the unborn ones, and I'm not surprised one bit to find out that you feed Leta edamame and *****WHOA******

Sorry about that.....channeling the Mormons again.....this has really got to stop......

Heather, you have no idea how happy I am to hear that Leta's at least trying the potty thing! I don't really, because she started after I left, but I totally feel like I had a hand in helping with that! After all, I am the one that showed her the Dora Potty. With Dora.

Hey up - thought you might get a giggle outta this, all the way from New Zealand (pronounced Nu Zeulund ;)

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/11/story.cfm?c_id=11&objectid=10505555

Nothing wrong with lying, I do it every day.

Jon is so wrong.

So. So. wrong.

Don't judge me..... but I have never had edamame before.... ever. I am most definitely getting it the next time I go to the store. Can someone tell me how to cook it? Just boil it?

You'll also be proud when she drops her first F Bomb...we'll at least the first time anyway, I speak from experience.

@ Twinsdad (#151):

I buy ONE yogurt and use it as a starter for my own yogurt. Maybe Heather and Jon have a yogurt maker? Or maybe they were making a dip? Who knows?

But mmmm. Edamame.