Captured by cameras for the first time
The last time Leah came to visit overnight we forced her to watch three-days worth of "The Dog Whisperer," and by the time she left she was poking us in the neck with her thumb and forefinger to get us to stop chewing on shoes. We have since seen every episode of "The Dog Whisperer," twice, and now our new obsession is "Planet Earth," an 11-part series about our planet, filmed over a 5-year period in 200 different locations. We watched at least 4 of the 11 episodes while she was here, including the one dedicated to life in caves, and let's just say that any misconceptions we may have had about bat poop HAVE BEEN CLEARED UP.
"Is that what I think it is?" she asked as the camera panned up a 300-ft tall mountain of bat droppings.
"That depends on what you think it is," I answered.
"I think we're looking at a heap of bat poo." And for the next seven hours I had to resist blurting out BAT POO whenever there was a lull in conversation.
Up until that point in my life I hadn't ever been confronted with the idea that bats excrete anything, let alone the fact that this excrement would perform such a vital function in their habitat. That mound of Very Important Bat Poo provides essential nutrients to millions of cockroaches who in turn serve as food for something else, and so on and so on, and years later you're sitting there eating a chicken burrito for dinner that was made possible because some bat flying around in a cave in New Mexico decided to use the potty. SCIENCE IS AWESOME.
So we get to the end of the episode where they take a couple of minutes to show how the camera crews infiltrate these areas to get such interesting shots, and there's this British camera man talking about the suits they all have to wear while filming so that the cockroaches don't crawl into their pants, and he keeps referring and gesturing to the mountain of poo behind him. Except his accent makes it so that when he says POO, it sounds like he's talking about some sort of rare, elegant cheese you might serve with expensive champagne, and suddenly Leah's looking at me, and I'm looking at her, like, I know we're supposed to be grossed out, but this man could be describing maggot larvae and I'd still want to throw my panties at the television.
You must have a dooce® Community account to leave a comment.
If you've already registered, login.
If this is your first time posting here, snag a free account.
FM Living
J. Bo said:
BAT POO!
12.11.07 - 03:11 PM / 1Julia said:
I can't even look at the screen imagining all the cockaroaches.
12.11.07 - 03:13 PM / 2Jenna said:
We have a ton of bats in our vacation house attic and sometimes we'll go there and there will be bat poop running down the wall in the shed. I'm convinced that one day we will light a match and the whole house will explode from all the gases.
We've tried getting rid of them but they keep coming back...
12.11.07 - 03:13 PM / 3Barbara E. said:
Mound of Very Important Bat Poo is my boss's secret nickname.
12.11.07 - 03:15 PM / 4Leyre said:
Not to be super gross, but I kind of wanted to know what the texture of it was. Like, was it a mushy mountain of bat poo? Or is bat poo more firm than that? I figured it must be more firm, because they were walking on it right? I was disturbed by the amount of curiosity I had about the poo of another animal.
12.11.07 - 03:15 PM / 5Julie said:
You crack me up! Thanks for the laugh.
12.11.07 - 03:15 PM / 6RH said:
hilarious...as always
12.11.07 - 03:17 PM / 7Sarah said:
I concur on all fronts: british accents are dead sexy, planet earth (and all science shows) are kickass, and bat poo is fascinating.
12.11.07 - 03:22 PM / 8hello insomnia said:
I'm always fascinated by the lengths they will take to film the episodes. I don't have the guts to tackle that much poop, bat or otherwise.
12.11.07 - 03:23 PM / 9Lindsey said:
I went to an Arbonne makeup party awhile ago, and the consultant was preaching the evils of traditional makeup, going so far as to tell us that horse fat was in foundation and concealer and that mascara was made up entirely of bat poop. I just shrugged, because what, did I think eyeshadow was composed of rainbows and butterflies? I don't care what kind of animal poop is in mascara, as long as it keeps my eyelashes curled and defined.
12.11.07 - 03:25 PM / 10Anonymous said:
The current Planet Earth is good, but I prefer the narration of the original BBC version better.
12.11.07 - 03:25 PM / 11anita said:
That Leah is one lucky friend. Wild games of Candyland and harassment by a knee-high person seizuring to tiny tot Mormon music, a trifecta extravanganza of "The Dog Whisperer" and stimulating conversations revolving around bat excrement. Color me jealous.
12.11.07 - 03:25 PM / 12Anonymous said:
How gorgeous was that mountain? Sparkly!
12.11.07 - 03:30 PM / 13Lindsey said:
The Caves episode is what nightmares are made of: claustraphobia, bats, snakes, cockroaches, and suffocating in a pile of bat poo. I had trouble sleeping the night I watched that one. Planet Earth is awesome though--I think I've given it to just about everyone for Christmas this year.
12.11.07 - 03:31 PM / 14Pete Dunn said:
Donna and I have spent way too many late nights watching these shows too. I'm particularly fascinated by the cinematography as well. Some really kick-ass technology plus sitting around for days makes for some very cool shots.
12.11.07 - 03:32 PM / 15Diana the Scale Junkie said:
I just watched again in HD, simply amazing!
And you don't throw your panties at an Englishman you throw your knickers ;-)
12.11.07 - 03:35 PM / 16Lauren said:
Planet earth is possibly the most amazing thing ever made.
Well, besides that TV show over here where they put 12 incredibly stupid individuals (they were tested on intelligence..and the least intelligent got put in) in a rocket to go into 'outer space' when in fact it was a simulator in a warehouse in London. Fantastic.
12.11.07 - 03:35 PM / 17Sadie said:
What is really impressive to me is that bat poop has its own special name, 'guano.' I mean, what other animal really can boast that?
(For some reason I am frightened and also excited that I may find the answer, later on in your comments section)
12.11.07 - 03:35 PM / 18kalisah said:
those planet earth shows are AWESOME. But I didn't watch the caves one. Ick.
12.11.07 - 03:38 PM / 19Friday said:
If I saw an episode of Dog Whisperer staring Chuck, I think my head would explode.
12.11.07 - 03:38 PM / 20Ely said:
This show is proof that TV can still be amazing with all the writers on strike.
It makes me appreciate science for making something like bat poo seem interesting
12.11.07 - 03:43 PM / 21chilldogg said:
So sad that we don't have these series in Germany.
Watching the film of leta the entry before, I noticed that there were two hiccups- the first after 12 seconds and the second one on 23. Very cute..
12.11.07 - 03:44 PM / 22anne nahm said:
.... Thus explaining the gigantic mount of panties in front of tvs for future generations. :^)
Also, Baby Jesus says to tell you Hi:
http://annenahm.com/?p=361
And Merry Christmas!
12.11.07 - 03:45 PM / 23Jennine said:
Not even a champagne truffle from Godiva would make me enter a cave with a 300 ft tower of bat poo. I hope he bathed himself in Clorox.
12.11.07 - 03:46 PM / 24kalisah said:
hey anita - I don't think "Be a Friend" is a Mormon song is it? I thought it came from a Disney movie...
12.11.07 - 03:56 PM / 25Erik said:
For more information on the power of Guano, I suggest you rent Ace Venture: When Nature Calls.
12.11.07 - 03:56 PM / 26littlefirecrack said:
I am sure that the episode with all the POOP was totally fascinating to Leta poop POOp pOOP, pooooop!
12.11.07 - 03:56 PM / 27J. Bo said:
And now we all know why Batman and Robin wear tights tucked into their boots-- it's on accounta the poo in the Bat Cave...
12.11.07 - 03:56 PM / 28Anonymous said:
Planet Earth is fascinating, but these shows aren't new. They were out last season.
Sigourney Weaver (the narrator) is good, but if the guy at the end makes you want to throw your panties and/or knickers, you should get the BBC version. David Attenborough is phenomenal.
Bat guano is awesome. Supposedly, it is a fantastic fertilizer.
12.11.07 - 03:59 PM / 29m@ said:
The bad poo is the one memory I have of Carslbad Caverns. Ah, the smell.
And I'd like to go on record saying that "Planet Earth" is the most awe-inspiring nature special ever. And not just because of a 3-story tall mound of Bat Poo.
Although the DVD's are strangely lacking Sigourney Weaver's narration and it no longer says "... for the first time ever" every 5 minutes.
12.11.07 - 04:02 PM / 30